Spanking, Canes & Whips

Discussion in 'Spanking' started by MisstrisstoSir, Jun 10, 2013.

  1. I am the Miss (sub) in a 6 yr relationship.
    We are very exploratory in our sex lives & really enjoy pushing boundaries.
    Yesterday he introduced the Cane using that many times on my arse which i have to say was amazing, we also play with various other toys to and I do love getting slapped and being spoken down to, insulted etc.

    I have a question for other Submissive partners:
    After every amazing sex session that we both really love and fully get into our roles, the following day I am quite often really emotional. I want to know if any others feel like that and if they can say why they think it is?

    I don't think its related to the pain or the bruising or the way we speak to each other that makes it happen to me, Honestly I love seeing the bruising, the reminder of how hot it was, but i just can't get my head around why i feel so down the next day.

    We don't live together.
  2. Willy Blue

    Willy Blue Senior Member

    How long does the feeling last? its probably just a side effect of someone being demeaning towards you and well, abusing you in reality. Its not upsetting at the time but afterwards subconsciously you are upset. Who knows though, I am no expert.
  3. Manservant Hecubus

    Manservant Hecubus Master of Funk and Evil

    It can also be a come down. Sub-space is a nice place to be.
  4. kairilove

    kairilove Member

    Hey sweetie, to me it sounds like you are just having a post-experience catharsis. I am a spanking extremist, both sexually and DD, and while erotic spankings never leave me with anything other than ecstasy, discipline sometimes drains me emotionally for a while. During the spanking I go through the natural release and sensations, but sometimes when I have been particularly stressed or a complete Bitch for a while it is like the spanking breaks a dam and everything comes flooding out, occasionally lasting for a few days. I always feel much better afterwards, but it can be a rollercoaster. Maybe you are going through something similar?

    Do you practice dd or just erotic spanking? You may want to try it if you haven't, though not everyone can make the separation. What emotions are you mainly feeling?
  5. Hi Kairil.. I think you just hit it on the spot with the stress side and how the spankings breaks the dam... I am fine again now, it doesn't last long.. but of course, we see each other maybe 2/3 times a month, but we speak daily (skype) and have become pretty good at torturing each other with our ideas of what we want to do or try... then the day comes, we have a fantastic experience (yesterday from 8am - 4pm pretty much the whole time albeit an hr i guess, for food lol) and its very intense too, so yes, all the stress and hype, etc it makes sense that next day in my vanilla life i realise how relieved i am lol. Thank you for you post...although what is dd?
  6. Hi Willie Blue.. thank you for your reply however I must stress that none of what we experiment with can be called Abuse in its usual term... I am submissive but I also make a LOT of suggestions on what things we can try knowing that all of them have the potential to cause pain. It is (and i know it may seem really strange or weird to some) the knowing as well as the experiencing of that which makes it so good, so intense.. A lot depends on where my mind is focused to.
  7. Willy Blue

    Willy Blue Senior Member

    I might just understand more than you think Mistriss, thats an odd name to choose for a sub tho isnt it, do you do dom to?
  8. Not odd to us ;) And No, I do not, not as yet lol.
  9. kairilove

    kairilove Member

    Hey miss, it sounds like you have a good thing going, there is nothing like those all day erotic love fests :D I am glad what I said makes sense to you, I feel amazing after that release.

    DD refers to "domestic discipline". In most cases is refers to spanking etc. that focuses more on powers exchange and submission with the top being seen as an authority figure outside the realm of sexuality. Keep in mind though it is a spectrum ranging from strict non-sexual punishment to deep eroticism and everything in between. In my personal case there is a more stark separation, I have an extremely deep rooted spanking fetish, just the word is arousing, but I also look to spanking as a purely non sexual punishment for behavior, stress relief, attitude adjustment, self discipline and focus, etc. There are two completely different mindsets I go into that really do not overlap. Even in self spanking it depends on my intent, either incredibly gratifying sexually or remorse induced vulnerability and purification.

    Giving your response to your encounters I thought experimenting with both sides of the coin might work well for you :)

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