Ok, the story is this. After graduating college I moved from the east coast, where I have lived my entire life, to Los Angeles to be with my boyfriend. He is from here and we met in college. I love him dearly, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Our relationship is going great, however, I find myself depressed and homesick often. I miss my family, friends, and farm life, and this city with the mean people, the violence in my neighborhood etc., just depresses me. I know that the problem is my needieness....because I do not have my friends or family here I seem to expect my boyfriend to be there for me in all these capacities. I know this puts a strain on him, yet I can't seem to get my feet into the independent soil. I am a very friendly person, but I hate fake people, and this tends to be a place that abounds with them. In addition, my job is working with kids, so I don't even have the opportunity of befriending coworkers. This is why I am still nearly friendless after 4 months here. My boyfriend also has a lot of friends, and he has a fairly regular routine such as going to play basketball every Sunday. I understand this, but it makes me jealous that he can go off with his friends any time that he wants, while I cannot. I understand that everyone needs time apart in a relationship, but I have no one to go to, and the last thing I want to do is spend more time by myself. I don't know what I am asking really. Maybe if anyone has been in a similar situation and found useful coping strategies, or can reccommend something that might help me get over the homesickness and loneliness.... I don't want to drive my boyfriend away by being so needy. Thanks
join a clube or somethign where you have regular contact with other adults, even say a martial arts class or a cookign class or something like that. go volutneer once a week and interact with real people that way
The plus side of living in LA is that there are a ton of things to do. The only way that you are going to make friends is to put yourself out there to make them. I moved from L.A. to middle of nowhere Montana if you want to talk about culture shock! Hell, I moved from Florida to So Cal..... My mom once told me "every child should live at least 1000 miles from their parents for at least a year. I have found her words to be true. Living away from my "support network" forced me to become more independent and seek out new friends. Good luck in L.A. and try to get out and enjoy the variety that L.A. has to offer. It is an extremely diverse city, and there is always something you can be doing. Join a gym, get a dog and go for walks, take classes, volunteer.....tons of options right on your doorstep. Yeah, some people aren't too friendly....but that it true of most places. Many of my closest friends still live in L.A......
