Shrooming for adventure.

Discussion in 'Stoners Lounge' started by Thories, Feb 14, 2009.

  1. Thories

    Thories Member

    Hey guys. Kinda quiet day for me, sitting back watching transformers and Narnia getting my way through this amazing bud I picked up the other week. (Been putting up with mids for a few months)

    Anyway It has rained for the last 4 days and its been about 75-80 degrees during the day and overcast. Which over this ways means the the mushies will be popping up faster than I can harvest. Not really but a good 300g wet should be very easy to find. (I LOVE tropical climates)

    The only problem is that I have to go alone. Not trying to sound scared but there are a few problems. Well one problem. The bull. He will always be somewhere along this belt of grass where everything grows nice and green (guess it the best grass). The problem being is this is where 90% of the mushrooms grow. Oh and that he will charge at anything that gets in his face, for a bull that's anything within a good 200ft!

    I would say this bugger is about 900kg! No idea why this aggressive bugger isn't hamburger. As the aggressive ones are normally not used as breeders.

    Does anyone have some good tips to deal with him or how to not have to deal with him. The guy who owns the place told me to be really careful as his horns are bare and full (apparently that means big and pointy) and will gut me in a heartbeat.

    Do any of you guys have any experience with bulls? I know the general rule that whatever distance the bull is from you, be half that from the fence. But if i just jump the 3 ft high typical wire fence is not 900kg of bull going to run the thing down if it chases me?

    Any advice would be much appreciated.
     
  2. weedwhacker

    weedwhacker TFM Bro!

    holy shit, that's scary. people will probably tell you to not wear red, but mythbusters tested that and proved that bulls don't go after specific colors...
     
  3. CannbisSouL

    CannbisSouL Smoke 'till you toke. Lifetime Supporter

    how about getting chased by a bull while on shrooms :D
     
  4. Thories

    Thories Member

    Yeah I don't think bulls see colours :p. But I was going to wear green/blue just so I can blend and appear less threatening for the bull. Which has only just moved into the paddock. (apparently this makes him worse too)

    I think I will just keep about 100ft back and keep and eye out.
     
  5. Thories

    Thories Member

    .... I cannot think of anything that would send me into a psychotic breakdown any faster :p
     
  6. Mother's Love

    Mother's Love Generalist

    "(Summer 1990, Canada) Although this story does not qualify for a Darwin, I'd like to share the most spectacular case of extreme stupidity I've ever seen. I was a soldier of the Lord Strathcona's Horse, an armored regiment stationed in Calgary. We were hosting elements of the British Army at Canada's main training center in Wainwright, Alberta. We took some of our new British friends to town, to party at the Wainwright Hotel bar. Around 1:00 AM, we decided to save cab money and walk back to the base. This was a trek of about three miles, because one must detour around a large, fenced pasture to reach the front gate.
    That pasture holds some of the last Plains bison in Canada, a herd of about 40 animals. Bison are not the friendliest ruminants on the planet. Safety signs are posted every ten feet along the fence, and warnings read, "Unless you can cross this pasture in nine seconds, do not attempt it. The bison can do it in ten."
    We reached the pasture and started to walk around it, but one of our drunken Brit companions decided that the warnings were fake. "Real, live buffalo don't exist!" Despite our protests, he opted for a shortcut. He hopped over the five-foot fence and disappeared into the dark field.
    We watched and waited.
    Seconds later, a high-pitched and very un-British profanity was heard from the pasture, and our friend came tearing back towards the fence at a speed that would have done credit to Donovan Bailey, the fastest man in the world. A fully mature and quite unhappy Plains bison thundered behind him.
    The only reason the young gunner survived was sheer, fear-induced acceleration. He vaulted the five-foot fence without breaking stride. His rear foot caught on the top rail, sending him spinning into the grass on the safe side, half a second before two thousand pounds of extremely unfriendly hamburger smashed into the fence at full steam.
    The fence is constructed of extremely solid steel pipes, yet the two-foot dent made by the bison remains to this day. The animal staggered, snorted, shook his head, and rumbled off with a splitting headache. Our friend escaped with a broken ankle, moderate concussion, dislocated shoulder, and a great deal of bleeding from his uncontrolled landing.
    Had he not cleared the fence, he would have been pile-driven to smithereens by the huge bull. Fear had drained the alcohol from our systems, but we were still laughing too hard to be too sympathetic as we gave him first aid and summoned help."

    http://darwinawards.com/personal/personal2003-08.html

    distract the bull, or don't go for it. i bet the farmer keeps him around so that he can get all the shrooms.
     
  7. Thories

    Thories Member

    .... Maybe I will give the bulls paddock a miss. Pitty it always has nice perfect Cubies.

    also how on EARTH do you distract a 900kg bull without making it angry?
     
  8. tculi

    tculi Senior Member

    how big is this area the bull is in? hmm i dont know how you would distract him if his food is the grass the mushies are in. Is there any way someone else can go with you? that would make it a whole lot easier.
     
  9. Thories

    Thories Member

    The bull is in a 2 acre fenced section with the bigger cows (You would think the angry bull would mount them all day long, or do cows like that?) ). The bull seems to like the middle of the area. Right along the green band where everything grows. 90% of my mushrooms came from this 2metre wide belt that stretches for about 150ft across the paddock. Its the best spot ever, and he knows it!

    Also there's no one that can come with until mid next week when I imagine they will be very little left if we get the suns and high temps we expect.
     
  10. †ù®Ké¥ š†ûƒƒïñg

    †ù®Ké¥ š†ûƒƒïñg Eminent Herbalist

    Lol, I don't know the hunting/gun laws in your area, but maybe you can get some tranquilizing darts?
     
  11. Thories

    Thories Member

    For a 900kg charging BULL. Do they make those? Surely they would kill a person.
    As for handgun laws. I don't know. Um Nobody has guns in my area. Actually Ive cant think of anyone i know who has one (exceptions being farmers and skeet shooters)

    Nice idea however i would probably be better off standing/laying still than ticking this bull off
     
  12. Bad.Fish

    Bad.Fish Sex wee pon de babylon

    I dunno man, our mushy season (semilanceata not cubensis) was around halloween and on feild which had some lovely mushy groups also had three psychotic horses. The owner was an old man who died a few years back and there was no family to pass the land or the horses onto so they've been in that feild for long fucking time with no human contact...I tried going in there once and all of a sudden i had three huge horses galloping towards me.

    I didnt have time to run and wasnt close enough to the fence to get away but by the time id thought of what to do they were all around me anyway. They towered above me, there was one on either side of me and another close by, they were only a few feet away, easily within touching distance (or stamping distance for that matter) I was pretty freaked out but i kept a cool head and picked up some grass to feed them.

    They took it fine but when i reached down to get some more they suddenly went mental, the one on the right hand side of me reared up on its hind legs, I thought I was fucked but it galloped past me only a few inches away this time and the other two followed it.
    They had'nt gone far when they wheeled around and came galloping towards me full pelt. This time I thought I was done for but they galloped straight past me, again with two on either side inches away.

    I got out of the feild grand and even fed the horses hay a few times over the fence, haha and talked to them while I was picking in the next feild (which was better anyway)

    But i never went in that feild again, its pretty fucking terrifying when you can feel the ground vibrating from galloping hooves right next to you and watching three nutcase horses charging towards you with nowhere to run or hide.

    If i was you I would just find another field, not worth getting gored over a few mushrooms, there will be better fields if you take the time to look. Does the bull have a chain in its nose?? here if a bull weighs over a certain ammount and if it still has its horns then there has to be a big thick chain from its nose to the ground, deters it from charging but still...there not much that would stop an angry bull. Sorry for the essay :p
     
  13. Thories

    Thories Member

    Thanks bad fish i always enjoy a good story when I'm smoking! Those horses must have been terrifying!

    Hmmm I wonder if I should be checking horse paddocks for shrooms as well as cows.

    Now. last night started pretty crappy with my bike tire exploding with the sound of a gunshot about 10 seconds from my house. So I put the bike back and started the long walk to the field. I get to the cow paddock and manage to get tangled in barbed wire that had broken and i didn't see. A few minutes of careful extraction and I get out scratch free and decide that a nice J would be a good thing to calm me down after my battle with barbed wire. (I like hunting for Shrooms high, I find them easier to see)

    So I start walking along following the green grass with lovely growth when i see a FIELD of mushrooms. I mean a freaking field. I spotted it from a good 40 meters away! I pelt up the slight rise away from where i normally find the mushrooms. When I get to this gleaming white patch I sit myself down to start ID'ing any possibles, noticing that the ground is very very wet.

    Unfortunately I quickly see that the mushrooms are all inactive. It was right at this second I had one of those "somethings not quite right" Moments. So I slowly stood up and turned around knowing damn well what I'm about to see. Mr Prickbull (Name I gave to the huge and overly aggressive bull) was standing about 20-25 meters away chewing on a patch of grass, not caring about me at all. Then I stepped on something crunchy. I swear it must have been the only bloody dry thing in this paddock and my foot found it right near angry bull. Well it crunched/snapping sound. and Mr Prickbull Suddenly looks up I honestly recon he hadn't noticed me because the look he had was total shock! It was a bulls *WTF* moment.

    Then a good 3 seconds later, with me stock still this guy got mad... REALLY mad. Muscles started bulging out of his back. It was like watching the hulk transform. He went from big and powerful looking to a bulging steroid chomping freak! He looked murderous standing side on glaring at me over his shoulder. I could just see his desire to decorate the fields with me so I start walking backwards trying to avoid stepping on anything loud. Luckily i was walking down a slope to a very wet part of the field where there was a small & deep creek i imagine the bull wont be able to or want to jump (4 and a half feet wide) Once I am about 40 meters away I turned and bolted and leaped over the creek. Landing in some ankle deep water but i didn't give a damn!

    The bull stared for a while. But went back to his grass. I avoided that whole area for the rest of the night. Such a shame because it was probably the only place for good growth as the rest was under about 1 inch of water. Amazingly I still found about 40 g of cubies that were sticking right out of the water! I even had a small cow come up to me to see what I was up to. The cow was very friendly but slightly annoying as she kept trying to chew on the patch of long grass I was searching. After an hour and a half of searching only getting 40g I decided to call it a night and walk home.

    Wow that's allot of text!
     
  14. yea.. like 1mcg of Carfentanil would totally fuck you up.. if not kill you..
     
  15. †ù®Ké¥ š†ûƒƒïñg

    †ù®Ké¥ š†ûƒƒïñg Eminent Herbalist



    Hell yea man, I got some that say for 1000-1500 pounds on them for bears , lmao I'm sure they'd work on a bull. They wouldnt kill a person, but it might make them trip balls lmao.

    You could just try to stand down wind and hope the bull has its back to you, and not make any quick movement or noise?
     
  16. Thories

    Thories Member

    Wow there does seem to be some damn strong darts! lol 10 000 the strength of morphine wow!

    Anyway I've already encountered the bull I won't be again! Tonight I am going with a friend, and we are staying well clear of him, and someones keeping an eye on him at all times.

    Hoping that the water has subsided overnight/today and we might have some very nice young cubies popping up! They would be under 48 hours old so hopefully they will be small which gives the best potency/weight. Seeing as I don't sell them this is perfect!

    Lets hope I can avoid that bull tonight eh.

    Ps turkey thanks for the downwind idea... Totally slipped my mind :eek: Lol With all the game hunts I've been on and i forget about smell. Wtf! Thanks dude for reminding me!
     

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