Sex with a pumpkin

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Chiefnut, Oct 25, 2019.

  1. Chiefnut

    Chiefnut Member

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    Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year old white male, resident of Wimbledon, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 pm Friday. Davidson will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the County courthouse on Monday.

    The suspect allegedly stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he decided to stop. “You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn’t.” He stated in a phone interview from the County courthouse jail.

    Davidson went on to state that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged “need.”

    “I guess I was just really into it, you know?” he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Davidson apparently failed to notice the Wimbledon Municipal police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

    “It was an unusual situation, that’s for sure.” Said officer Taylor. “I walked up to [Davidson] and he’s … just working away at this pumpkin.” Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Davidson.

    “I just went up and said, ‘Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?’ He got real surprised as you’d expect and then looked me straight in the face and said, ‘A pumpkin? Damn … is it midnight already?'”
     
  2. AstroShark

    AstroShark Member

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  3. Visexual

    Visexual Member

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    Funny joke but, it seems it's only a joke.
     
  4. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    That pumpkins junk is tidier than some real women. :p
     
    Mike Literous likes this.
  5. hotwater

    hotwater Senior Member Lifetime Supporter

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    As punishment he should be forced to screw this pumpkin



    [​IMG]
     
    Grand prix likes this.
  6. I'minmyunderwear

    I'minmyunderwear Newbie

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  7. deleted

    deleted Visitor

  8. wilsjane

    wilsjane Nutty Professor HipForums Supporter

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    Living in Wimbledon, I thought that is was a joke.
    But then I discovered that Wimbledon is also a small town in North Dakota with a population of 191.
    Strange things happen in places like that, :yum::yum::yum::yum:
     
    Visexual likes this.
  9. Adamskiffle

    Adamskiffle Members

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  10. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    Lol I like that one.
     

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