Sex problems with girlfriend, need advice

Hello, my name is Dave,

So, i have been with my girlfriend for 5 months, but i started living with her 3 months ago, nonetheless, we were sexting, i fingered her a couple of times, she gave a blowjob couple of times, but nothing sex related.
Now, we are both 21, and we are both virgins, she acts like shes ready for sex, making me buy condoms(which i have bought like 2 and a half months ago), saying after her period and everything like that, she is hella insecure about her body and i am in love with it. I figured its best not to rush sex with a virgin, but i didn't even actually see her vagina, i didn't get any blowjobs or anything in 2 months and im trying not to masturbate.
Please advise me if i should wait longer until shes comfortable, if i can do something to speed it up, or any advice really. I am confident and i am not shy about the sex talk.

 

The best I can say is try talking it out, "babe, I really need this, and need it from you". Don't deny yourself, masturbate some, just to take the edge off, otherwise you'll be super resentful of her. I don't understand why she's not at least giving you a little action, considering you've had some before, what's changed? Maybe she has a man brain, and has to have it spelled out to her, A, B, C. If we're not doing A, I need B, or otherwise I'll have to do C. Plan a nice night, buy flowers, have a few drinks and when you get home just hit the bedroom, undress and once she sees you there, she'll have to do something - I've learned you can't be shy about things you want and need. Make sure you get FAR past this before you consider putting a ring on her.

 

Hey, thank you for replying,

I have no clue what changed, everything is the same, at first for example, she would let me easily play with her tits and stuff, but now she has gotten sensitive as hell about it, she comes home from work at midnight, we eat and watch something and by the time its over its basically late, i ask her then but she says "its late we should sleep", but i feel like shes just pushing it to the next day and next day and so on, we usually watch something we are both really invested in and actually watch and not as a background noise, so whenever i try to do something while we're watching shes really into the movie so she tells me to watch. we wake up late, its so late, that she has to instantly go to work, 10 mins to get ready and thats it, she can't wake up earlier. before i moved in, it was only sexting, after i moved in, maybe 5-6 days passed and she wanted to give me a blowjob, then there were times where i slowly went towards it to finger her, and maybe get a handjob while doing so. After that the next time was like 1-2 weeks after when i asked her and i got it, but it was only once she offered a blowjob or anything sexual like that, its surely impossible thats she doesn't get horny once in 3 months. So i thought i would talk to her tonight about me being so pent up and horny, and if she can one of these days help me, and im sure i can help her too.

 

Been there done that several times. My best and extremely important advice is, sit down with here with absolutely no distractions at all. Hold her attention like your life depended on it. Tell her to look into your eyes because we are talking deal breaker here. You MUST discuss SEX extensively because for 2 youthful people it is very very important. I was in that situation and I got vomiting nausia headaches and almost lost my career. Then I caught her cheating on me. Then we split and I was relieved. Communication is more important than sex by far.

Sex is not a bargaining tool and it seems like it is starting out like that. Once she sees that you will do anything for the pussy YOU ARE FUCKED FOR YOUR ENTIRE LIFE WITH HER. Not something a guy needs to beg for. Every woman has a vagina, many fish in the sea. This is probably the best advice you will get on this subject.

I had a friend who wanted to have sex with his new wife who flat refused. He felt she was beginning to make it a, do for me and I will fuck you then marriage. He said if you don't then someone else will see you later and he left for 2 days. When he returned home they never discussed if he fucked someone else but the marriage began to work out well. You gota show you have some balls and are equal in all aspects. A guy is a human with needs. Just because she thinks she has a gold mine in her panties don't fall for it. You also have a gold mine in yours. Find someone who will appreciate your dick as much as you appreciate her vag. Please please don't make a mistake.


Read the Pandora's box story and that will give you a much clearer picture of what I am talking about

 

Yeah, something's up. Being busy is no excuse. Anti-depressants? He's right, up there - you need to get this straight now, otherwise it's tolerated behavior and you're headed for disaster. Sex is not a reward or something to be earned, it's a natural thing between two people in love.

Sometimes, from my experience, I think the longer she goes without it, the less she wants it - and the less she thinks I want it.

Good luck. And a good fuck....I'm hoping for you.

 

Talk to her. Losing your virginity, particularly for women, can seem like a huge, daunting thing - if shes worrying about it then she isn't going to feel sexy or in the mood for other sexual acts either. Women enjoy sex most when they are relaxed, and you certainly want her to feel comfortable during your first time so find out why shes gone a bit cold, is it fear of losing her virginity, genuinely tired from work or loss of interest or anything else. Use the time to find out what thoughts or ideas excite her about sex so you can try and implement them when you finally have sex. Don't starve yourself of masturbation because that will only make you more frustrated. Particularly with a virgin you have to be caring and considerate of her, people tend to remember their first time and you want it to be a good experience for both of you.

 

Why does a cheating relationship work better than a sex deprived marriage? Because there is sex. You are her equal not subservient. Masturbate 5 times a day if you need it but keep your dignity with your head held high. Don't become a puppy begging for a treat.

 

I know I am giving a lot of advice becauseI went thru it. Example: my wife tells me all the time, please don't rub one out, I am always here and willing to take care of business. This it the mind set of partner a man needs to live a happy sex life.