I was invited to a quiz night by some friends and my fuck buddy was there. I saw him, I know he saw me, he bowed his eyes so we wouldn't make eye contact. I'm sure he initially thought I may have shown up there like some creepy stalker chick and that I would try to talk to him and that must have freaked him out and made him uncomfortable. I never attempted to contact him or flirt with him from across the room nonchalantly. I had to walk past his table to get to the bar so I never made it clear I knew he was there. I was there to enjoy a quiz with my friends and not to see him, so I would like to think he got that, because I did. It was weird. But I have worried that it bugged him a bit that I was there. I think he goes there all the time and it was my first such event. He can't tell me not to go back because he was there first, but I don't want things to get weird. I hope he realises that I was there with my friends, and I hope to god that he thinks I never saw him there. But what should I do if he brings it up and mentions that it was just too weird and thinks we should call it a day? I hope he's more adult than that but its hard to tell. Has anyone ever run into their FB in public while with friends and was it also weird?
Xia, I think you done the right thing. You should act normal. My wife had a fb. We were new to the swing scene. The first party we went to, my then girlfriend, hooked up with him. He helped us meet other couples, but after a while he asked if we had any friends, who might be interested in meeting him. We invited him to a small party one night. No one had any idea what the connection was. He knew we wanted to be discrete and he respected that. And your friend should do the same.
HAHAHA! Childish fuckbuddy idiots think there's no consequences. You all know what you are doing is wrong or there wouldn't be a prob eh?
maybe he thought this girl was married? Either way if it is going to be tense, just ignore them. If the situation isn't stressful, she could have just said to him...hey, fuck ya later homie...
I would explain that your friend invited you and you didn't know he would be there. As long as you don't make a big deal out of it i don't see what the problem is. It's not like you announced to everyone that you are fuck buddies. I see my first true love at the store often. He usually smiles and winks at me. I usually smile back. We are both usually with our current spouses (or his current baby mama). There is acknowledgment without drawing attention to it. Our spouse's have never noticed i don't think.
What's up with all this secretive winking and looking away? OP, why would you fuck a guy who doesn't acknowledge your presence when he sees you in public. If my fuck buddies saw me, they would come up to me and say hi. Crazy4cock, why doesn't your spouse know that you saw your first love? Why is that something you keep a secret from your soul mate?
It's nothing that I keep a secret. He knows about him and sometimes i say "there is (name)" He knows how I feel about that guy. I will always love him because he was a very important person in my life. I lost my mom when I was 15. He was the only person that was truly there for me every second of every day through that. I will always be grateful for that. He was a much better friend than a boyfriend. He was the kind of boyfriend that when we would break up and i thought i was over him and would start dating someone what he would pop right back into the picture. He knew I would always pick him over anyone else. We would get back together and it was the same shit so we would break up and do that scenario over and over. Finally i met my husband. The ex popped back up and tried his old shit. I didn't fall for it that time. They both showed up to my house one day at the same time. It was time for me to make my decision and i told the ex he had to leave and it was over for good. I asked him to please leave me alone because it was time for us to both move on. He did for the most part, only occasionally calling before it stopped. 5 years after i was married he called me out of the blue after not speaking to him for almost 7 years. He said he was going through a really tough time and needed someone to talk to. I felt like I owed it to him for everything he had done for me in our teenage years. I talked to my husband about it. I never would have met with him behind my husband's back. My husband told me to go. I met him in public and talked to him. I finally thanked him for being there when my mom died. He was having baby mama drama. I talked to him for a few hours then went home. All those years later he was still the same person. Baby mama found out we met and he lied telling her i contacted him because i was having problems in my marriage. I called him and told him i was done forever. I don't need that in my marriage and he will always be important to me but he will never be back in my life in any way. I told my husband all about it. We have no secrets but I just don't think he needs to hear every time i see him across the grocery store. If we actually ever spoke to each other i would tell him.
Thanks. I have not texted him, or messaged him in anyway about the event or seeing him there, and just like normal, we are maintaining little to no communication. I will not bring it up with him, if he brings it up with me I know what I will say - i was invited there several times before and had never been able to get the night off work for it until now. Yes, I saw him there, but I didn't go there to see him- he was with his work mates and I wasn't going to embarrass him. I wasn't going to not have fun. If he asks if I'll go back again, I'll be honest and say no, work prevents it. Of he never mentions it, neither will I. If he is spooked by it and wants to call time I will have to then have to go into damage control mode. I think every Fb situation is different. He wants to keep this on the down down low. He's not told his friends or colleagues and I will respect the privacy he wants from this. This is his first such endeavour so I think he is still uneasy, so my fear is that I have scared him and he won't want a close call like that again and suddenly decides to break it off. A knee jerk reaction I think, and I hope he does not do that. I won't know until I contact him for sex.
I don't know man. Why is it so weird? You pretend like you don't even know each other? Cause what? If you greeted each other like you do know each other, everyone would instantly know just why and how? What if someone introduces you, then you gotta look each other in the eye and continue to pretend you don't know each other. Awkward... I guess I've never had a "fuck buddy" I prefer the "friends with benefits" though I'd still use the term fuck buddy because I like it better I had this dude I knew super casually, like totally acquaintances, before we had sex come up to me at a party and start talking to me. I had a knee jerk reaction at first like "we don't have this kind of take special attention to talk to me relationship" and then I realized instantly that absolutely no one would notice or give a fuck And I thought maybe he even thought I needed it, to like not feel like he was ignoring me and it might even be a little bit sweet.
You have to admit there is something not quite "balanced" with "lets put our genitals inside each other and engage in the most intimate and bonding act possible between two human beings . . . but it has to be secret, our friends can't know, don't acknowledge me in public, don't like me, don't love me, and don't contact me unless I tell you to." Doesn't exactly scream "healthy". These things do not work out well and in my opinion the people who engage in these things are using them as "placeholders" in their lives until they get their internal shit sorted out and actually meet someone they actually connect with. Just my two cents . . . but I don't even like casual sex, I get really, really turned off when a girl wants casual sex with me, it just seems like "you, and we, can do better." I feel like its settling for less. But I also COMPLETELY understand that there are needs to be fulfilled and that maybe such people arrive in your life at a time when they are able to fulfill those needs, despite some dubious and likely unhealthy circumstances and conditions.
I think people have a right to choose whatever kind of relationships they want, but will probably be happier if there is at least some level of positive personal connection.
I can't seen why it would be particularly weird seeing a FWB in public. It has happened to me plenty. The only situation that I can think of that would make it awkward is if I was messing around behind my partner's back - and I have never done that.
I am actually friends, or working on becoming friends with anyone I fuck. I can say hello to them I public. I can be seen with them in public. I spend time with them in public. If we run into each other, we might invite the other's whole group to join. If I run into one on a date with another woman, I keep my distance to avoid cockblocking, but if we make eye-contact I smile. Typically, I am called over and introduced as a friend. Sometimes I'm not, and I assume the other lady is prone to jealousy, or isn't known well enough to be sure she isn't. But, to be unable to speak if our other friends are around? I'm nobody's dirty little secret. That's disgusting.
