I'm not sure if I can make this work, but here goes! My name is Carrie. I currently live in the Chicago suburbs in a cookie-cutter apartment that costs me way too much every month, a menial job that barely pays the bills, and an ex-boyfriend who is moving out in December to go live out all of the plans which we'd made together....with someone else. I've been out of school for over four years now, and I've been miserable since then...and long before that. Sure, there have been bright spots. But the last time I was truly, utterly, and deeply happy was when I was in high school, and had friends which I could go camping with (amonst other things). I've always been fat, but I'm just getting progressivly larger as time goes by, because I spend all day sitting around at a depressing job, and then I come home, maybe make dinner, and then sit in front of a computer, read a book, or work on needlework or craft projects. I need a change. A drastic one. And dammit, I want to build my own cob house!!! *ahem* Anyway. The thought of communal living really appeals to me. Unfortunatly, I don't think I would be able to live in a lot of the communities out there. I, like the vast majority of people who have tried to live a modern life and failed, have credit card and student loan debts. As such, I need the ability to make several hundred dollars a month in order to keep those bills in line. I would need to live somewhere that has access to jobs - not well paying ones, but ones that would allow me to keep everything kosher in case I ever decided/needed to move back to the regular world, and I wouldn't be able to give everything I make back to the community. I also wouldn't have this job right away when moving in anywhere, nor would I have any money saved up for rent/dues/application monies. A lot of places I'm looking at also require an impossibly long "trial" period. Sure, if I wasn't working and didn't need to work, I could manage to do this. But I am tied to my lease here until the end of May, as well as keeping up with those Other Bills. I cannot afford to take that much time off work, nor would it be approved. I need somewhere that I can visit for a weekend or a week, and if I like it, be scheduled to move into at the end of May. I am also an avid meat eater. While I do not judge those who are vegetarians, I refuse to give it up entirely. I enjoy vegetarian meals, but I will not limit my pallet to such things. I have two cats that also would either need to be accepted into the community, or I would need help finding homes for. I do not want to be an irresponsible cat-mother and dump them in a shelter. One is four years old and fully armed, while the other is eleven and front declawed. My ex is willing to take the younger cat (and yes, I do trust him with her. He's an idiot, but not a complete ass) if I am moving into a situation where I cannot keep her, or it is in her best interest not to do so. But I still have the other one, and finding a home for a senior cat is always difficult. I would want to be somewhere with at least some modern convienences (electricity, internet access of some flavor, television, running water, etc). Ideally, I would want to be as far from Chicago and as close to the ocean (either one) as possible. But the right living situation is more important to me than the location. I have looked on multiple websites, and I have found a lot of information. But I don't know if what I'm looking for even exists. Any input, suggestions, or pointers in the right direction that anyone could provide me would be greatly appriciated. If you wish to email me privately, you can do so by emailing "c dot kauzlarich at comcast dot net" Your help is sincerely appriciated!
I enjoyed your post. It sounded very sincere and honest. I wish i could help. I also feel that i'm in a rut that is hard to break out. I live in a bach apartment and work only 35 hours a week at a job i really don't enjoy. But sadly to say its what i know. Communal living concept has appealed to me greatly. All working together for the community. There is know I, you all work for the collective goal of the community. Using the skills that we are blessed with to make the community work. I sure there is a place out there for us. Don't give up and keep looking. Just don't let your surroundings and situation get you down. Good luck and peace...
Well it is a nice post and all I can say is to go do it and damn the consequences, I've been at a job I don't like for 24 years and did all the right things such as raise my children, work ovetime to give them things and the thing that they wanted most was my time...I didn't neglect them but I wasn't home as much as I could of been, even now I work overtime so I can save money to go visit. I wish I would of had the balls to do things that normally wouldn't of been accepted such as communes, hiking the countryside and attempting to live off the land. But alas I'm getting older and lucky wiser but also the aches and pains of growing old. Get out and do what you want when you're young and able, there will be time for work later, college bills are tough but they aren't going to throw you in jail if you get behind in payments, they can garnish wages, tax refunds and pensions later in life, but if you can't pay them don't let it get you down, I'm paying a bunch for my daughter but if I didn't have the money they would be the first bills I would drop. I've been responsible all my life and to chuck it all into the wind doesn't fit me anymore but I do dream of it. I dream of a self sufficient lifestyle, garden, farming, and whatever it takes to live off the land, but being not wealthy the commune appeals to me. So you say you are a large person, there are people out there that seek the inner beauty much like in the movie "Shallow Hal" the trick is to recognize them when they come by and see their inner beauty also. Go live your dreams, at least you will be able to say you tried. Don't wait untill it is too late. If it fails then you get back into a normal life...take the plunge. Good luck Dave
Thank you for the kind words. I'm afraid to chuck everything to the wind. If I were to do that I wouldn't just stop paying things, I'd file for bankruptcy. Still that would force me to live in a commune-type environment for at least 7 to 10 years...and what if I don't like it? What if I get sucked into a cult-like situation and I need to escape? I couldn't go back, and I don't know how I'd go about joining another commune if I didn't have the join fees that so many of them have. Maybe I'm overanalizing things. I don't foree me living anywhere that completely cuts itself off from the outside world. There are still some things that I assume I would still want access to - you can't build a computer out of sticks and leaves for example. Therefore I'd still want some disposable income for myself. In reguards to the whole inner beauty thing...I wasn't so much looking for that, because the chances of that are even slimmer than me being able to do this I'm looking for a more communal/natural lifestyle in the hopes that the activity required for daily tasks would help me to lose weight. Not to impress anyone, but just so I can be healthier and have greater stamina and mobility. I'm also not truly young anymore...I'll be 28 in March. I'm not saying I'm old, but I'm not 19 and full of boundless energy. Hopes and dreams I have aplenty, but now I understand most of them are pipe dreams. If this works out, great! But the reality is that I'll probably either move into another cookie-cutter apartment, or tie myself down to a shitty condo, or *gag* move back home. Thinking about moving to a commune makes me happy, if I can push reality away long enough.
Before I had kids to provide for I always romanticized dropping out of traditional housing and living off the land, and working in town at the same time. Not to really push this as a viable option for you, but I can picture you packing your essentials in a car, moving to a new town where nobody knew you as that girl under society's toe, with job/place/cc/TV/no vegetable-eating vegetable, purchasing only a gym membership and a cell phone, registering with the local temp agency, working, working out, parking the car at safe places near a state forest, national forest or other free wilderness, and walking or biking into your own private campground where you spend the night. Have a bank account that all your funds further free you from your debt, and in ten years you'll be able to emerge completely fit, gorgeous from all that fresh air and healthy living, with the funds to purchase a house in time to still have kids even if you want. Of course if you get richer sooner you can always do what you want then, even a year living out of a "place" can save you 7 - 10,000 dollars. This can be done, and I've friends who do it, right in my backyard in Utah, although I don't kid you that winters can be tough (but not really in the South, though there's less jobs) but my happiest times were doing this in California. I didn't save my money in those times, though, 'cause I spent fifty bucks on fancy dinners with the wine and the lobster three times a week, but it was sweeet living yeah baby. Even just a bike, a cell phone and a gym membership (to shower, change, groom, watch TV as well as work out it's essential to feel less like a hobo) with some of your stuff stored in a permanent gym locker, a locker at work, or a lockable bike trailer will free you. This whole post was a nice revisit to my own little fantasy, so sorry and fahgeddaboudiht if you're soooo not interested and I was just assuming you don't have kids since you didn't mention it. But you know, even living this way just for the summer, when you get out of your lease in May, will earn you enough for a commune fee (btw think you could post some of your searched links on that I'm curious) by fall. Anyway, cheers for your spirit and best of luck to you! Becca
Hmm. How can I do all that stuff without a permenant address though? The bank needs one. The cell phone people will need one. The gym will want one. Though I suppose a PO Box would satisfy them. But what about the post office? Do they care? The temp agency will ask for ID, and don't I need a driver's licence/state ID for that? I know they won't take a PO Box. Or do I just still pretend to live where I do now? Is that the trick? And how badly will that get me in trouble if I get caught? There also arn't a lot of places around here that I could seriously pull that off at. The forest preserves that do exist don't seem like they'd be safe places to pull a stunt like that, and they're patrolled by their own version of a police force. How do I find a place to set up camp that won't get me thrown in jail? IF I could pull it off though, I would. The problem would be telling my folks. They'd insist that I'd be "better off" living with them and not having to pay rent, and they'd never understand. They'd fill me with horror stories and any confidence I had about the idea would be shot out the window. And I can't keep telling THEM I live at the same address...they'll want to come by at some point, or want to give me things. I'll think about it though. I'm just trying to think the idea through, not invalidate your idea. And no, I don't have any kids (nor do I plan on ever doing so).
As for the links, I've been looking at the places on ic.org, and a lot of links about cob housing. But a lot of those are workshops, not communities.
If you were doing it for just a summer or a year or so your Driver's liscence address (even if it's not valid) is enough to get a job. They changed mailbox etc. address structure so you can't make it look like you have a street address anymore to fool you parents, that's what I did, for a year they thought I had a place when I didn't, I visited them not they me. But a PO Box is OK for a job and gym and cell phone, sometimes not a bank account so for that you could still either forward mail to your PO Box from your DL address or you could check in with the Community services, local homeless shelter, in Utah they let you use their place as a mailbox in special cases, which you would be no doubt! Thanks for the link, remember some community living happens on the streets, in the woods... Becca
Right now I live in Rolling Meadows, but that's only until May. I'm trying to figure out what to do with myself after that. I'm looking at a full-range of options, from moving cross-country, to moving downtown, to buying a condo, to moving back in with my parents and paying off debts, to what I posted above. Hey, you looking for a place to stay from January to May? I've got a second bedroom I need filled
move to minnesota!!! its a great place, lots of wilderness, lots of outdoors to explore. But, if you have lots of debts, movin in with the 'rents sure helps you get those debts cleared up fast, cuz that'll be all you have to pay for
*sigh* That's a lot of debts, espically when you include the student loans. I'd be looking at at least two years living with them...and I'm already miserable That woudln't help matters, that's for sure.
The go with moving to minnesota, i've known alot of people that have moved from chicago to where i live, i dont really care for it though, cuz most of them bring unneeded violence and drama that this town doesnt need, bunch of gang bangers and shit, that wanna be able to walk the streets sporting their rags and colors and not get shot at. But kind folk..... we'll always take them
Yeah, I'm not a gang banger from the city I don't know what I'm going to do yet. Knowing me, I'll end up at home because that's the "smart" option, rather than the "make yourself happy" option.
I've lost track of how many places I've stayed in the last 3 yrs...last time I changed the address on my driver's license was Dec.2002. I haven't given the post office a change of address form in a year. If anyone needs to send me anything then I hope they have e-mail otherwise I ain't gonna get it.
