Relationships and romantic love...

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by hippie_chick666, May 16, 2007.

  1. hippie_chick666

    hippie_chick666 Senior Member

    Are bullshit! This is my opinion. I believe that romantic love is based upon demands and unrealistic expectations for partners to be "perfect." No one is perfect; we all make mistakes. We all have flaws. Relationships tend to ignore these flaws until they come out in fights and arguments.

    What is real then? Friendship. I believe your life partner should be your best friend, someone who you accept despite their flaws. REAL love is about acceptance, not demands on who the partner "should" be.

    What are your thoughts?

    Peace and love
     
  2. Allonym

    Allonym cheesecake slut

    love isnt about thinking someone is perfect, i dont know who the fuck told you that piece of idiocy
     
  3. hippie_chick666

    hippie_chick666 Senior Member

    I came to that conclusion based upon the people in my life and their demands on their romantic partners. Each one had their own idea of what their partner should be like and when their partner didn't measure up, when one of their flaws came out, then there was a huge fight and/or breakup. So yes, I do believe this is true of all ROMANTIC relationships. Please provide some evidence to contradict my position, if you can.

    Having sex with a partner doesn't equal romantic relationships, BTW.

    Peace and love
     
  4. hippie_chick666

    hippie_chick666 Senior Member

    Also, I specified romantic love. I wasn't talking about REAL love. REAL love is about acceptance of your partner, with their flaws. I feel like I'm repeating my OP.

    Peace and love
     
  5. Allonym

    Allonym cheesecake slut

    i love my partner romantically, i love himi truly, i love him for who he really is. i suppose you have yoru own defintiion of romantic love however that not everyone is gonna agree with. if youre arguing about different words, you need to define them better sugar
     
  6. such a complex subject. because everybody is different with everything. personally when i used to have emotions, i needed someone to have many of certain qualities. thus the ideal person For Me. as for friendship, i was only interested in that when not in relationship. i could never of loved a friend, just value the friendship.. but there was only one that i was bothered about.
     
  7. Freekowtski

    Freekowtski Member

    Today we can't trust in anybody around us.
     
  8. mlee27

    mlee27 Member

    friendship first for me is a must. but isn't that how a realtionship should start off to become more?how many people do we actually know who had a one night stand and it grew into love? i honestly don't know anyone. i think the word love is used way too loosely now a days. people mistake sex with love. and what about love at first sight. it should be lust a first sight.i have been in love for 7 years and i didn't love him the minute i saw him i grew to love him as i got to know him.i agree with hippie chick friendship before love...always
     
  9. hippie_chick666

    hippie_chick666 Senior Member

    Then how do you define romantic love? You never defined your own definition.

    Peace and love
     
  10. hippie_chick666

    hippie_chick666 Senior Member

    I believe that friends of the opposite gender should help each other out when they have sex problems, such as not being able to get laid. At this particular point, one friend should ask the friend with the problem if they want to talk about their problems. Then the latter friend should say, "I can't get laid." The former friend is required to say "Can I help you with your diliemma?" In other words, can I have sex with you, purely as one friend helping out another friend. And the latter friend should answer "yes" because it is rude to turn down a gift, especially the gift of sex. Then, when the time is right, they should copulate and if that experence is a good one, continue. This should be the code of male and female friends. At least, this is the code that I live by. Too bad none of the guys in my life are able to consumate this code. Which is why...

    I don't believe in relationships. How can you only have sex with one person for fifty years? That seems like my version of Dante's Hell. Only having sex with one person for about 7 months made me go insane with thoughts of sexual relations with other men, even some that I wasn't attracted to. I just had this everlasting itch that needed to be scratched, and I couldn't reach it. It got really bad when I couldn't have sex for a month at a time. I NEED sex like I need water. If you haven't been able to tell by now, I am a nympho, although I never have cheated on a partner, mainly because I believe in total honesty with people you care about (assuming that one cares about their partner).

    So why do people have closed relationships? I can't quite figure it out. I think many people fear that if their partner had sex with other people, their partner would leave them for those other folks. It is based upon insecurity and a confusion about sex and love. I will address the first issue in this paragraph. People, especially women, are insecure. I have normal insecurity issues, but I don't let them interfere with my thinking. Some people let insecurity take over their lives. Insecure people often feel unworthy and believe their partner will find someone better than them and leave them. This poison of insecurity will rot anyone's mind, if they let it. I believe that relationships are based on the feeling of security by having a partner to rely on. That security is very comforting, but it is false. In the end, you can only rely on yourself. No one can do it for you, especially a partner. This is a trap that fuels many relationships, especially codependent relationships. People want someone to be there for them, through the good and the bad, which is why they need to be in a relationship to begin with. NO ONE NEEDS TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP!

    And on to the sex and love confussion. One particular boy told me that he had sex with my after he knew that he loved me. Yeah right, we had only known each other for two weeks and had just started dating. He made a common mistake, confusing good sex for love. They are not the same thing, not even the same sport. Sex is completely physical. Some sex is good and some is bad, whether it is due to the size of genitalia or experence of the participents. If the sex is bad, stop having sex with that person and find someone else. If the sex is good, keep on keepin' on!

    Love is supposed to be about caring, about trust, about helping. I guess I can't really expand love more than that. Romantic love is bullshit. I love everyone on here who is tagged and many more who aren't. I would give my right arm for you guys. That is true love. Romantic love is based on demands and expectations for their partners in order to be "loved." This is bullshit. If you really love someone, you will accept them for who they are and forgive them for the mistakes they might make. Instead, most romantic relationships end when one person doesn't live up to the expectations of their partner. This is not real love at all, but people being selfish, thinking only of themselves.

    I hate relationships because they are based upon unreasonable expectations (usually). I hate relationships because romantic love is confused for real love. Relationships can create enemies out of friends. They are so draining and take up too much energy.

    What do I want, if I don't want a relationship? I want friendships with men, something that can last even when the sex is gone.

    Peace and love
     

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