red flags

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Boogabaah, May 28, 2006.

  1. Boogabaah

    Boogabaah I am not here

    one of my ex's has been trying to sweet talk me into being with him again. i've been trying to tell him i need a friend more than i need a lover. he butters me up saying he agrees and then ask me to come over ONLY when we can be alone. :confused:

    okay i'm getting a big red flag. usually my dumbass would ignore this because i HATE being single. i can tell you exactly what will happen if i ignore it.

    i'll go over there. we'll have great sex. he'll be as sweet as pie. i'll leave feeling "high" on him. then he won't be online. won't call me. months later he'll have some lame.. " the family needed me" excuse and it'll start all over again.

    so please tell me that i'm doing the right thing. it's gonna be hard because i already said i would, but then after thinking about it.. i KNOW i shouldn't.
  2. RetroGroove_Grrl

    RetroGroove_Grrl I'm a big girl now

    you have to play it right by your feelings babe. unless you can kep it purely sex, dont let this dude waste your time
  3. Boogabaah

    Boogabaah I am not here

    yeah and i do not want a "friend with benefits" i want an actual relationship:&

    you boys are so confusing.. i'm sure us girls aren't any easier to figure out
  4. RetroGroove_Grrl

    RetroGroove_Grrl I'm a big girl now

    Well, hes an ex for a reason, and it sounds like you already know the reson... just keep him a friend without the benefits
  5. Suncatch22

    Suncatch22 Member

    Awww ... I know the feeling.

    I think you're doing the right thing ... as difficult as it is.

    Best of luck ... I'm on your side! :)
  6. Boogabaah

    Boogabaah I am not here

    thanks both of you..

    i am weak. i try not to be, but then i do dumb stuff anyways.

    he got online but didn't message me.. probably because i have my status as "sorry but i think i'll pass" .. i'm sure he knows it's for him
  7. Boogabaah

    Boogabaah I am not here

    nope.. i spoke too soon.. he's messaging me asking what that means.. i'm just gonna tell him
  8. steffan

    steffan puffin

    you deserve more respect than that booga, expeciely if you demand more respect than that.
    dont let yourself be used
  9. Boogabaah

    Boogabaah I am not here

    i talked to him.. told him what i thought.. and

    he wasn't even hurt.. you'd think if he really wanted to be with me.. he would have been hurt at least a little :confused:

    i'm sure i'm right now
  10. ihmurria

    ihmurria fini


    You're doin the right thing babe
  11. YankNBurn

    YankNBurn Owner

    yup keep that wall up to keep you two apart, seems he is a user is all. I know you likely want to be loved and all but you know what he wanted so look for the real deal out there, its there someplace for ya.
  12. Gypsy_girl

    Gypsy_girl Member

    YaYeah this guy is a user and like someone else said he's an ex for a reason. From the way he's been treating you I wouldn't even keep him as a friend but hey that's up to you, but definitely not more, it'll only end in heart ache for you.
  13. starkmojo

    starkmojo Member

    no you're not..

    As to the situation i say go with your gut feeling; it feels wrong its because it is wrong most likely.
  14. lynsey

    lynsey Banned

    stay away all exes want is sex usually. stay strong
  15. Boogabaah

    Boogabaah I am not here

    hhmm.. and then i get two offline messages from him asking me how i am, hoping i'm well..

    he's a nice man.. BUT i wonder if its all part of his game. since he wants to play.. i'ma play right back. i had told him i needed a friend not a lover.. so he can just chat with me online.. and i'm not going to tell him anything he doesn't need to know. but as far as hanging out with him.. alone.. it's NOT going to happen. .. because i know what'll happen.
  16. spooner

    spooner is done.

    To be fair, whats happening here is pretty simple. Its just not what you want to hear.
  17. Boogabaah

    Boogabaah I am not here

    not really.. he says one thing.. but means another.. i'm not a mind reader.. so i'm just gonna go with my gut feelings and not hang out with him
  18. starkmojo

    starkmojo Member

    yeah have to go with that first feeling... alays best...

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