Recurring dream about a man that's not my husband

Hi everyone! I'm new to this forum. I'm hoping someone can help me understand a recurring dream. I am going to give you a brief description of me, how I dream and a long description of my most recent dream. So I'm sorry for the essay!

So I believe that dreams have meanings and have done since I have been a child. Mostly I'm the only person I know in my dreams. Sometimes I'm on my own, sometimes I'm with strangers. I do dream about people I know but it's rare. Sometimes I have dreams that come true - rarely about me or anyone I know but things that happen in the world like plane crashes, big fires etc.

I am married and have two children. I am in my late 20s. I am a bubbly outgoing person but lately I feel like I've lost some of my spark. I have a full time job - not the career I want to be in but I am really good at what I do.

So now to the dream .....

I keep dreaming about a guy. I don't know him really well, we've only met a few times in the last year. I keep dreaming about him ever since I met him the last time a couple of months ago.

I do think this guy is handsome and charming and we've had some nice chats when we met but that's all! I also respect what he does! He does a lot of public speaking and travels a lot! That's how I know him - I've been to events he has been working at.

So my dreams started at us just being friends.... a bit flirty but usually we would just be chatting and having fun! This went on for weeks (in my dreams). Not every night ... I would say he appears in my dreams 3 - 4 times a week.

The last couple of weeks it has been more intense and it ends up that we sleep together. So I will describe my dream from last night as I remember most of it.

This guy was public speaking with some other people and I was at the front. He invited some people up on stage - me included. He talked a little with everyone and then came to me last. He talked to me for ages and was flirting and putting his hand around me. When I went to sit down he came over to me again and was chatting to me for ages ...... then I woke up ..... it was the middle of the night so I eventually went back to sleep .... and continued to dream about him.....

this time the event was over and we had decided to go back to his hotel room - I told him nothing would happen ( not cos I'm married, in my dream Im single). We had to walk my friend home first (she sometimes comes to these events in real life). As we walk back she accidentally slips into the river, but then we realise that she didn't (very random). As we are walking I ask her to not tell anyone I am going to his hotel - she agrees.

After we drop her home we go to his hotel. It's really odd. It's a boutique type hotel with white French style furniture and the rooms and floors are different sizes, shapes, uneven. We go to his room separately - he goes first, I follow and I find it odd that we go downstairs to his room instead of upstairs. Even though I am dreaming I'm telling myself that I am only going back to his room as friends but as soon as we get to the room we get physical! It doesn't feel seedy in any way and it feels like it was meant to happen! It doesn't feel like a cheap one night stand - it's something we both want! I'm aware that he wanted this to happen because he wants to be in a relationship with me and I guess it feels like we are loved up!

Then I wake up ..... it took me ages to realise this dream wasn't real. It basically echoes the other dreams that I've been having about this guy! When I wake up I feel so guilty because I think I've actually done it and it takes so long for me to realise I was only dreaming.

Can anyone interpret these dreams? I know it sounds strange but I feel like I'm cheating when I wake up and it's stressing me out! Does it have something to do with my relationship with my husband or does it mean something else? Thanks.

 

i'm pretty sure there are lots of men in real life who are not your husband. if you have lots of dreams with people in them, it kind follows that its kind of probable they will be in them too.

one thing to me, is that dreams take place in a different universe then we are awake in. one in which some very basic fundamental physical principals work differently then they do here. which is one of the ways, for me the only way with the kind of dreams i have, you can tell which universe you happen to be in at the time.

i should come as no surprise then, that people in dreams who look like people in this world, and it can go a lot deeper then just how they look, more often then not, have absolutely NOTHING to do, with the people in this world their appearance resembles.

it follows likewise, that someone dreaming at the same time, that you know, even intimately, from this world, might look nothing like, and act very little like, how that person does here.

you know i'm not big on cookbook interpretations, for the simple reason, that each of us have our own internal symbolisms, that aren't nearly as universal, as we, or those who write catalogues of symbolism, might otherwise imagine.

i'm also not convinced that most dreams are even meant to be symbolic at all. even when they represent a world as our more intuitive and less analytical sub conscious might experience it.

so you may see dreams as "having meanings". i see them as real but separate places, where things just happen to work a little differently then how they do when we're awake.

 

I can interpret it: You think he is sexy, and were you single you would definitely go for a guy like him. In your dream its all good because its all your reality. Hes probably got things your hubby don't got.
Its that simple.
I constantly run into women I would fuck were I single, but I don't do it because I take comfort in the relationship I am in now, and I would lose that comfort if I had cheating on my conscious. Im a pretty damn stable person and I know just what I want out of life, and so I know not to do things that would hurt the people I care about most.
Probably not a good idea to feel shame about it, your just going to confuse yourself. It's not like a dream really matters anyway. Your thoughts and your dreams are your own. There's no need to feel like you got cheating on your conscious, because you most certainly have not cheated.

 

the dream world is a seperate reality. you can make friends in it just like you can here. they're just not the same people, even if they look like they are.