I've figured out that you'll never completely be who you really are. People matter, they have to. It's our existence, and we have to mold into something usual...we're human and we have human tendencies. We live in the past, everything we know in books, on the televsion...has already been written one way, so we have to continue living in the same way because we know nothing else. We become a part of everything and everything becomes a part of us. We are what we see all around us. People take away from our individuality and we take away from theirs. There will always be someone watching you, judging you, picking you apart...and we'll notice and we'll change. We'll become what we think society wants us to be in order to feel better...to be oblivious. If you chose to not care... you'll travel on another road where nothing is familiar....you'll lose the way;noise and traffic become obsolete. And you can't take anymore because you know different, and you're tired of the normalties, the repetitiveness, tired of habit. And you can't share this...they won't know what you're giving them...and they'll look at it, and they'll laugh at you. Because that's what they do. That's their first instict...and it's silly...and they can't see it how you see it no matter how hard you pull on them. So you let go, you become detached, and you're all alone now...with this world inside of you. No one understands, will they ever. So what it trickles down to is what is more important? Being understood, following this inustrial, political, unearthed path, or what you found in you, but alone. Layers and layers to peal away, no one wants to take the time...you're too complicated. You don't make sense. You're misunderstood. No. I refuse to believe that. screw it.
