Polygamy vs Monogamy

Whats your stance or thoughts on monogamy vs polygamy? And would you be in a polygamous relationship or a monogamous one?

 

Although a polygamous relationship doesn't sound like a punishment necessarily (but it very well could be ) I prefer to not try it out myself. I don't see why I should be against other kind of marriages if they don't involve me in any way :biggrin:

 

Do what you want . I think it's a fun idea, but I'm not sure if it's for me!

 

I'm asking in what kind of relationship would you be (if you were in one)? And why?

 

The definition of Polygamy:

"The practice or custom of having more than one wife or husband at the same time."

Is that what you mean? Or do you mean swinging?

 

yep, thats what I mean... would you marry/date more than 1 person? In some countries, polygamy is legal.

 

monogamy. polygamy is not my type of thing. if it works for some people, fine, but it doesn't come naturally to me.

 

Relationships are kind of a pain in the ass if I'm being honest. 1 relationship. More than one would be way too much trouble.

I'm in a healthy relationship and all but deep down I am kind of selfish and I don't like to compromise. With one person. Much less two

 

It works for some folks and not for others. My wife and I tried this with another man, back in 1985, but it fell apart after half a year because of jealousy issues (mine). Another couple that we know tried it with another woman and it lasted for a couple of years, before failing (again due to some jealousy issues.) FYI, we lost touch with our male friend many years ago when he moved out of state. The other couple are still great friends with their lady partner, and the husband still has sex with her on a semi-regular basis, but they're no longer a stable triad.

Yet another set of friends of ours are in a very stable triad (two men, one woman), and have been for at least 30 years. In fact, the trio has two grown children (one boy and one girl.) Each of the children was fathered by a different one of the men.

So, it can work. It just takes the right mindset, some effort, and constant communication for all involved. In all those respects, it's really no different then a convention (two person) marriage (hetero, gay, or lesbian.)

 

It depends on a lot of things:

Polygamy would be a mess in terms of how one files taxes financially, and for simplicity I say monogamy.


But because there exist situations where say 1 spouse isn't really all there anymore (physical or mentally gone from an injury or otherwise like a coma) then, I don't shut the door on marrying a 2nd or more individual, as long as one's commitment to the first isn't put aside.

And I also think that the addition of a spouse, and the adoption of each successive spouse, needs unanimous consent and agreement from all current spouses, and thorough back round checks done before all marriages are amended and sealed.


Furthermore I think all marriages should be closed in instances of polygamy, otherwise there really becomes no difference between being married and not at all if both "wife" and "husband" are sleeping with other people and they all know about it. That's just an open marriage at that point in my view.

 

Poly is not the same thing as an open marriage. Poly is having committed relationships with multiple people, although the definition of "committed" is dependent on the people involved. I'm in a poly of sorts and it works good, but takes more work than monogamy and, I think, a clear dynamic of one person in charge. You need mostly go-with-the-flow follower types or everyone will be butting heads and jealous. It can get more complicated with insecurities, differing sex drives, kinks, financial goals, etc, but you should have figured this out long before moving in together and already aware of the problem areas.

So, is poly worth it despite all this extra work? I think so. Here's why: most people in a monogamous relationship let themselves go. They get comfortable and don't try, which makes both people unhappy. Being in a poly is like continually dating... you're always working on yourself and accountable to multiple people so you don't just let yourself go near as easily. Of course, there's all the obvious stuff: men aren't built to be with one woman; putting all your sexual needs on one person can be tiring for them; putting all your emotional needs on one person can be tiring for them; financially easier with more incomes, etc...

 

i commented in all the other top threads , why stop now..

i like to stick with my honey, and no use any other brands..

 

I just play monopoly.

 

Monogamy, but an open relationship. It works for us.

 

Monogamous.
I am very much against polygamy and even open relationships.

 

for me personally real monogamy is right (non-open)

as far as the others I figure as long as people know and are honest fine it is you life.

I don't like people who cheat, lies are something I can't stand

 

Honesty and fidelity are more important in poly than monogamous ones... poly relationships are more fragile and affect more people.

 

I love sex with new people constantly, but when it comes to real friendship/relationship/marriage, few people are compatible with me and I like to keep them. I'm fiercely monogamous in everything but sex partners, if that makes any sense

 

All for monogamy. Too jealous to share hubby with another. He feels the same way- wouldn't share me with another man, so we are both happily in a monogamous relationship.

 

why not creating a new family model in which a number of men marries an equal number of women and children are raised by the whole tribe. stop with claustrophobic couple relationship in which one man and one woman learn to hate each other and if one of them decides to split or dies children are fucked up.