i know this is a lesbian forum but i feel as if i will get the best answers from you chicks here.. so if you could just please take the time out to read this, i would really appreciate it. i usually dont go posting my problems on forums looking for answers but i feel so completely lost right now.. i have figured out within the past year that i am bisexual. im not some ignorant highschool thats like "i would kiss a girl but NEVER date one".. i here that ALL the time. well. i have been best friends with this year for about a year and a half (i know, the 'best friend' delima.. i bet you get alot of these topics) but really.. ive grown to love her so much.. so much. i get so nervous around her now that i know how strong my feelings are. im so afraid of her rejecting me... i dont even know anymore. ahh. i can be all chill around other chicks im not this attracted to or whatever but around her.. i get butterflys. i would LOVe to have a relationship with her and wouldnt give a shit about what ANYBODY thinks sometimes i feel like she feels the same. but doesnt say anything. the was she smiles and blushes.. but then i see her talk to other people.. and ill be like oh thats just her personality. its weird because we talk about alot of stuff.. sex with guys.. but the topic of bisexuality rarely comes up. but i KNOW she has had feelings for girls one time in the begginning of our friendship she told me about how when she was with her last bf a year ago.. she had a thing for this older chick who played guitar (and she does too) and they had this connection and would make out alot. but she told me 'im so glad i never touched her vagina.. because i found out later that she had herpes' hah. BUT.. i sometimes feel as if im not good enough and i have jelousy issues. ive always had them.. but with her.. its like crazy when i find out shes hanging with another girl. i turn green with envy is the girl is hot. but the thing with this girl shes been with.. thats the thing.. guitar.. she loves guitar.. they both did.. i feel im not good enough because i cant have that connection with her.. and if i did. we would be togethor man i just like her so much. and things have been rocky in our friendship within the past few weeks. shes been depressed because i have been struggeling with drug issues and i keep telling her im done. and i finally am but i feel like she doesnt trust me. girls. i like her so much sometimes when were togethor.. and i really really think she thinks about it to.. and then ill play times in my head weve had that will make me be like.. no it cant happen like this one time she was like 'everyone thinks were lesbians because were always togethor.. hope was like, are you guys fucking?.. and im like dude no.." i didnt know how to respond to that.,.i was just like "uhh haha." were like eachothers only good friends. were smoking buddies.. were so much alike yet so different. were yin and yang. we balance eachother out shes more of the dominant one though. conversation starter.. im just so SHY around her and NO ONE else. im constantly wondering what shes thinking about me. then other times ill think about how maybe it could happen im not crazy obsessed or anything i just have a good memory with things like this.. i mean comon.. you know when u have feelings for someone you remember every good thing theyve said about you.. at least i do but the only times i feel like we have actually come close to something happening.. is when were drunk. but now she doesnt drink anymore.. and is all against it so im like DAMN . i would love to have another alone drunken night with her. im so sorry this has gotton so long i just REALLY needed to vent shes so beautiful man. anywho. i bought two tickets to see ani difranco, her favorite muscian at the end of JAN. one for me, one for her. i was too nervous to give it to her on her bday in NOV. so now im saving for christmas... and im planning on giving it to her tomorrow before she goes away for a week. i hope she really really absolutely LOVES it thanks girls peace & love
fuck. lady, this is one bittersweet story. at least you have reasons to believe that you are fishing in the right pond, so to speak. it's not like you're hardcore in love with a girl who's super straight and homophobic. this friend of yours seems like a real cool bean and i honestly think that you gotta go for it! you two obviously have such a great bond, and you feel so strongly for her that it would be a shame not to. i understand you're nervous, but what about making plans with her and calling it a "date" (unless you do that already, in which case there's always ways of dropping hints that it's not just a friend thing). ani tix! my girl that's amazing, i'm actually jealous! you probably gave them to her by now, what did she say? good luck sister! peace atcha
i just gave them to her a few hours ago. she started crying because she was so happy.. and i dont think she was expecting me to give her such an amazing gift. i went up to her and hugged her.. i felt myself shaking.. i want to be myself around her so badly.. but i get so nervous and i hate it. any tips to help me chill the fuck out.. hah.. but other than that.. we watched a movie togethor afterward.. i just am so afraid to make a move because i dont want things to get akward.. i dont know how she feels mannnnnnnnn ahhhhhh
