Parents Making A Fuss About My Decisions

Discussion in 'All in the Family' started by Metal Groomp, Jul 31, 2015.

  1. Metal Groomp

    Metal Groomp Members

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    So, today my parents found out I was a witch and they didn't respond so nicely. They are Christians and I knew they wouldn't like it. Then they started ranting about how it's evil and they don't understand how it affects my life and how I make that decision but they won't listen. It's so frustrating being around them and always judging me and my choices. I'm not evil or anything but they sure do treat me like I am. I hope it'll calm down sometime soon.
     
  2. Sleeping Caterpillar

    Sleeping Caterpillar Members

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    Parents can be a real drag, especially if their tied up in religion. Do you know how deep their roots actually are though? I basically found out my parents only went to church to set an example for us kids. Feel like I was played into a nightmare.

    Point is, you might have to accept that they won't come to an understanding of your wiccan beliefs if their pretty serious christians. Those folks are truly convinced in goods and evils.
    But if there's a chance they only adopted religion mostly out of having a family, maybe they'll lighten up a bit in due time.

    Either way all you've got to do, is what you've got to do. Can't say I understand wiccans so much, how'd you become involved/interested?
     
  3. rollingalong

    rollingalong Banned

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    who is pictured in your avatar?
     
  4. Metal Groomp

    Metal Groomp Members

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    Thanks for the advice. I'm not really asking for support but to just accept the fact that I chose this way and how it fills the holes in my soul and I can feel one with nature as part of it.

    Sorry if my post seemed childish, my parents were argually ranting about sending me to a professional to fix me up and sending me to live in youth centers or something so I made this pretty hastily.

    Dave Mustaine from Megadeth.
     
  5. rollingalong

    rollingalong Banned

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    of course...metal....that's unfortunate ....lol


    ive done a spotlight on megadeth....maybe even twice.... they opened for some other band...maybe judas????????...i'm old and it is all a bit foggy
     
  6. Heat

    Heat Smile, it's contagious! :) Lifetime Supporter

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    Part of gaining maturity is knowing that others will not think all your decisions are good ones and are going to be supportive of them and accepting that.

    You have a right to your own beliefs as do they. Compromise could be letting the subject drop or further discussion so that they understand more why you feel the way you do. Only you know them and the right approach will depend on that. Often time does help as acceptance comes with that.

    Smile, someday this will seem like a small blip in your life. I did say someday. :)
     
  7. rollingalong

    rollingalong Banned

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    little wiccan thing...1.50

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOd05l6gD-U
     
  8. Meliai

    Meliai Members

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    I've never told my family I'm not a Christian. My mom is actually super cool and laid back and couldn't give less of a shit but my siblings, cousins, aunt and uncle...the reaction from them would just be annoying. Its not worth it so I keep my mouth shut and it mostly works. Just don't involve them in that part of your life.
     
  9. Metal Groomp

    Metal Groomp Members

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    I wasn't planning on telling them until I got out of the house and living on my own but apparently they went snooping through my stuff and found my journal which contains all that information about it and proceeded to yell at me and all that nice stuff. It was just so unexpected, I didn't think they'd do that but now they can't trust me anymore.
     
  10. FireflyInTheDark

    FireflyInTheDark Sell-out with a Heart of Gold

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    My mom is a church organist. Has gone every Sunday and played in two churches since she was 11 or 12 years old. That said, she raised me with astrology and crystals and reiki and ghost stories galore, so I had an introduction to other things later on. Even she didn't react well when I told her I identified more with paganism during one of my few times per year visits. I explained my philosophy to her and she just got so uncomfortable... She got up and paced around and straightened things and talked about how she was a traditionalist and she would never change, and I said "okay, you don't have to, but this is what I believe and I can't go back." I drove 8 hours back to my apartment the next day and on the next holiday, she sent me a witch's almanac. She actually said she had perused it a little before she sent it to me and that she thought a lot of the articles were interesting. I knew she had taken her time and made peace with it. I wish the same for you, though I know some hearts are more difficult to change...

    Just know it's the fear talking. They have been taught, probably from a very young age, that if you don't believe this, your soul is in danger. They accepted it and don't question it. You believing something else not only makes them afraid, but it threatens their belief and makes them question. And then they fear that if they're questioning, their faith isn't strong, and then they're afraid all over again. Christianity teaches not to be "yoked together with unbelievers," which basically means they should not associate with you. They now have to make peace with that. As dumb as it may seem to you, you've presented them with a dire spiritual dilemma. It's not your fault, but try to understand where they are coming from.

    Unless they abuse you over it, then screw 'em and get out as soon as you can.
     
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  11. deleted

    deleted Visitor

    maybe you should of told them you was a muslim first., then when they got pissed about that , give it a week naw ma and pa, Ive decided to be wiccan instead..
     
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  12. GeorgeJetStoned

    GeorgeJetStoned Odd Member

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    The best advice I can give is to play the game until you are on your own. Forming an adversarial relationship with family only sucks more and more with each passing year. When you get your own place, it will be you who makes the "while you're under MY roof" kind of rules. Until then, play the game so you don't come home to conflict every day.

    I realize this can seem like capitulation, but it doesn't have to be. Jst try to understand that no matter how old you are, your parents still see your entire life span to date including your childhood. It's a catalog of complicated feelings that goes into a kind of fast forward/reverse when you get into an emotional conflict with them.

    I will also suggest not attacking or belittling anyone for being a Christian. Most of them are decent people who don't cause conflicts in anyone's life. However, there are a LOT of faux-Christians who have memorized a few lines from the book and feel like they are everyone else's moral authority. Those are the ones spouting endlessly about "John 3:16" but know nothing of the other chapters in the book of John. Like the whole concept of judgement laid out in chapter 7.

    These days bagging on Christians is very easy since the real ones rarely fight back. But that doesn't mean they won't. There is no Christian mandate to always take it on the chin. My own family is riddled with "Holiday Christians" who used to make events like Christmas miserable by showing up to settle old scores and judge others. Feel free to call them out, but crack the book so you can do it right. Noting shuts down a fake Christian like the real words of Christ.

    I'll never forget a woman I worked with telling me "The bible says, do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Well, that's the Golden Rule, and it's not in the bible at all. Just as the term "Anti-Christ" is not located in the book of the Revelation. You can usually drive these charlatans back into their self-serving hole with a few genuine verses. Acts 10:42 also throws them for a loop!

    Try to have fun with it. You'd be amazed how they will back the fuck off once they realize you have done your homework.
     
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  13. GeorgeJetStoned

    GeorgeJetStoned Odd Member

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    As a parent I have managed to raise 2 children without feeling a need to search their shit. My parents did that sort of thing and to this day I don't trust them at all. Of course they gave me plenty of other reasons. I think some parents actually prefer to have a tense relationship because it gives them the feeling of power (not control). It's an illusion they fool themselves with.

    Neighbors are another story. You should hear the way they gripe when we sacrifice a goat in the front yard for Saturnalia!

    Fkin bigots!!!!
     
  14. Metal Groomp

    Metal Groomp Members

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    I wish my parents could be like yours. Mine are firm set in their beliefs and it looked like they almost had a heart attack just finding it out. Now, they're wondering where they went wrong with me and how they raised me good and sheltered me and I give them this? I knew they'd reacted badly to it but not bad as in sending me to a correctional facility bad.
     
  15. Moonglow181

    Moonglow181 Lifetime Supporter Lifetime Supporter

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    I don't know anything about wiccan rituals and witch craft, but does it include sacraficing animals? ...because i hope we are more enlightened that that if it does.
     
  16. Mattekat

    Mattekat Ice Queen of The North

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    Thats tough. My parents aren't religious, but I definitely had a few moments when I was younger that they were less than proud of, like the first time I tried dating a girl. Most things they will either get over eventually. For the things they don't get over as easily, I have found it is much easier to play along when you are in front of them. I hope it works out for you.
     
  17. Wizardofodd

    Wizardofodd Senior Member

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    No. It doesn't. In fact, if anything, it would promote respect for animals as a part of the Earth.
     
  18. Wizardofodd

    Wizardofodd Senior Member

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    More like....you can't trust them. They went through your shit and they are the ones saying their trust has been violated? How old are you? Just wondering as a point of reference.
     
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  19. Metal Groomp

    Metal Groomp Members

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    I put those items in a place that I knew no one would look at but then they go and just open up and I don't know why they don't trust me either. They said that I was ruining their lives when they found out.

    I'm 16 and a half, by the way. Yep, I'm still a child.
     
  20. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    I would go as far as saying, thats what most are actually about

    Stuck in their ways, following what they were taught to believe as a kid, or its just an act for the kids, or to fit in somewhere or the rest of the family

    And dont not necessarily believe any of the stuff that spouts from their mouth, certainly not follow it or only if it suits them

    The ability to open your mouth and have words come out doesnt prove any of tthose words are truth
     

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