Hi everyone, so my wife and I have been married for 4 years and thankfully we have amazing sex so I don’t masturbate often. However, when I do masturbate I find myself thinking about some really really filthy fantasies that involve my wife ( some I know she would never want to do, and others I’m not sure fully myself haha) rather than picture our sex from last time. I stopped watching porn right before our marriage as I definitely used to have an addiction. It’s all mental images now. Do any other guys have this problem? If so, what do you do? Do you block out the fantasies or indulge in them alone?
The root of your problem is that you believe it is a problem in the first place. Understand that fantasies, no matter how weird or twisted or gross, take place on a very private stage. Whatever your imagination conjures on that stage is yours and yours alone. You are under no obligation to share it with anybody, no matter how intimate you are with that person. Fantasies that seem dark and evil are normal and we all have them. As long as you confine them to the inside of your head, they can’t hurt anybody — including yourself. That we all have them is just nature’s way of clearing our minds all the mental shit we accumulate simply by having to live in a complex, ambiguous, and stressful world. Only your words and deeds to your fellow humans determine whether or not you are a good person. The demons that hide in your darkest fantasies cringe and tremble each time you say or do something that brings happiness to others. The demons may live in your head, but they cannot control you.
I have a powerful imagination brain, I can imagine and fantasize about anything in detail. Since my childhood, I used to sit alone and think about birds, the sky, stars, animals, and many many things which most kids are interested in. Later, as a teenager, I was involved with the sex fantasy to wank off daily. After marriage, I have had fantastic daily sex with my wife for many years, but I have never been able to stop masturbating. I think masturbation pleasure is different from partner sex pleasure. Masturbation is mostly based on fantasy but intercourse is involved physically with your partner. So, both are normal sex activities. You can have sex and masturbation with your wife and enjoy yourself together. This is the best way
You're welcome. You can talk to your wife and engrave her to do mutual masturbation which mostly ends with sex.
That sounds hot! I’ll definitely try that later on today. Too shy to tell her what I masturbate too though haha
