I'v never told this whole story to anyone before, so I hope you enjoy it! It all started when I was driving home after 6 months at sea with the NAVY. I lost control of my car and crashed it into an irrigation ditch, which ruined my plans for the weekend. I decided to go with my friend,Chris, down to Long Beach since I didn't have anything better to do. That's where I met my girlfriend, Michelle. The first night we met, the four of us decided to head accross the mexican border to T.J. for some fun, I had sex with her in the morning and then Chris and I left. Just a fun weekend, right? Wrong, I fell in love with her that weekend. We saw eachother almost every weekend for the next year after that. It was perfect, then on one of my visits down to see her, I did some coke and didn't tell her. We had a Drug test when I got back to the base and 2 months later I got kicked out of the NAVY after 3 years of service. Michelle had a nice place with some friends from college, so I moved in with her. A few months later we got our own apartment in down town Long Beach. I was working at a car dealership and she was working at a large department store, things were going smooth. Then I lost my car sales license along with my job. She started stressing over money and eventually moved out of my place and in with her parents 1 hour away. We were still together, but it sucked not waking up with her in my bed every morning. She started to get insanely suspicious and a little crazy. No matter what I did, she would always think I was lying and cheating. Then one weekend we went to see Bruce Almight, afterwards she left to go stay at her brothers house 3 hours away. The next day she accidentally called my cell and left a message with her saying goodbye to someother guy, and I guess I could just hear it in her voice that she was going to fuck him. When she got home and called me, I told her to swear that she hadn't slept with him, but she couldn't do it. A few days later I took a makeup letter over to her work, but when I got to her jeep, I saw a picture of this dickhead in her car and relized she wanted to acctually be with this guy she had just met 3 days ago instead of me. I felt like I didn't have anything to live for anymore so I started selling speed. Smoking meth took the pain away, and I fuckin smoked every single day. She finally called me in sept. of 03 to say hi, I invited her to Disneyland and we got back together. Things started getting better, although by this time I was addicted to meth, until she got pissed at me one day and let the truth out. She told me she had gotten pregnant while she was with him and that she had an abortion.Well, whatever scrap of life that I had been holding on to went up in flames right before my very eyes. I still sell meth, cuz she just dosent mean enough to me anymore to make me stop. We were doing it during most of this, and I though we might have a chance if we stopped, so I told her stepdad she was doing it. Hey, she told my dad that I was selling it a long time before that, and I was greatful to her for it. I didn't see her for about 2 months after I told her dad. She has come over mabey 10 times since her parents found out, and it almost seems like it would work, now that we don't dope. Getting all that out makes me wonder why I would put up with it all, and still love her. The reason I put up with her trust issues, and her lying, and her cheating, is because of her uncle. You see, when Michelle was a little girl growing up without her real dad and a mother that was never home, her uncle would put his dick in her mouth and make her suck it for candy. She told me that somtimes he would come and she would choke on it. And Michelle never told her parents, so she would have to shake this motherfucker hand at family reunions. I told Michelles' stepdad about it, and uncle tony don't come around no more!
thanks for the input bro, I need all the encoragement I can get. It feels really good just to actually get it all out. P.s. I love this new social distortion cd Sex Drugs and Rock&Roll
wow, yeah what george said... hope things work out honey, and that you can kick the meth *supporting hugs*
