Need some tips please =)

Discussion in 'Genitalia' started by Arrowhead Water, Jul 3, 2006.

  1. Hello, let me start by introducing myself. Male ofcoarse, and I picked the name Arrowhead Water, becuase its the first thing that i saw sitting on my desk when i was trying to think up of a name.

    So, iv been dating this girl for about 8 months. I'm actually ashamed of this, but need to get help sometime right? My problem is, that through all the months, iv never been able to get her to an orgasm. Be it by hand, or tongue, iv never been able to do it. Its just literally impossible.
    Now just let me explain myself. The story behind this, is that she happens to be one of those girls that discovered her clit at a young age. Were talking young...maybe 6 years old or so. Now becuase of that, it just seems that shes been doing it for so long, that it would be impossible for me to actually nail exaclty how she does it, and get her to one. Also, im her first aswell, so shes had no experiance before this relationship, and nor do i. It's funny becuase iv tried so many times...sometimes for 40 minutes straight.
    I hope this really doesn't get out of hand, but im really asking for just some structural advice on getting her to an orgasm by hand, or mouth. She definitly does not like direct contact, so she prefers areas around. I know certain moods are required, and im really willing to do anything at this point to get her to one, even if it means lining up a whole room with scented candles and etc [​IMG]. Some do's and dont's could be good, and a girls point of view aswell.

    Thanks in advance.
  2. His Eden

    His Eden Queen of Mean

    Sex can be satisfying without the "big O" and all that happens when you try to force the issue is that it won't happen. (Think "a watched pot never boils" ) Instead of trying to get her to orgasm why not just have fun and let it happen as few things are more enjoyable than an orgasm that sneaks up on ya ;)

    but.....Ya might suggest a clitoral hiatus (ie: stop playing with it!) and that will make it more sensitive.

    Good luck
  3. Fastswitch

    Fastswitch Visitor

    What great advice, Eden! Do as she says. Took me ten years to learn that on my own.
  4. ihmurria

    ihmurria fini

    if she likes a certain kind of touch, don't stop right after she's told you it's a good kind of touch

    Ask her to masturbate for you, so you can get a better idea of the kinds of strokes she uses, where she touches herself, etc

    Mental arousal is different for every woman. Some want the bed strewn with rose petals, others want to be pushed down to their knees and a cock rubbed in their face. It's such a different and personal thing, we can't really predict what your woman would want
  5. Hmm, well shes gone on vacation with her parents. I would have gone, but shes chinese, and i guess when they say family, they only mean family haha. But anyhow, thats a whole month of not seeing me. What do you think? Maybe i should try right after she comes back?

    THanks for the advice haha.
  6. BigKing

    BigKing Member

  7. dibblydowcus

    dibblydowcus Member

    I agree with Ihmurria: Get her to guide your hand into the places she finds work for her when she masterbates.

    Also I'd mention that you may be thwarted by the clitoral hood, if you run your finger from inside up to the top of her vagina you might find yourself uncovering her clitoris more completely than before; added to that if you are using your tongue you may find when she is very wet and turned on a small 'iron' taste of her clit which is where you want to be.

    (It must be something to do with the blood close to the thin tissue in the nerve head of the clit that gives it the 'iron' tang!).

    Another approach I'd echo from Ihmurria is the sensitive about ways method! I've found that a full body massage with 'baby oil' (you don't mention where you are from but what I mean is the oil used in changing nappies {dippers}). First over her back, buttocks and legs - then turn her over and caress her breast and thighs. Once shes relaxed and beckoning, then gently use your might want to use this time to involve her by asking her to guide your hands.....she might think it a wee bit kinky - but hell thats all the better - eh?
  8. Thanks for the advice!
  9. astrobreaux

    astrobreaux "pan"

    one thing missed> some women have an underlying mental block. some will actually turn it on just to keep you trying and coming back. i've had a few that i spent hours trying, repeatedly, day in and day out. i see those as a challenge! if she can make herself come, you can too. but she has to let herself. watching how she gets herself off is the best start to solving this. another thing is bringing her to such a state of relaxation through massage that she's about to fall asleep and SLOWLY reversing things to bring her to an aroused state often helps. it's actually just a good practice to do all the time and doesn't go unappreciated. tension, stress and moving too fast too soon are all orgasm killers in both sexes, mostly for women and older guys. men are like lightbulbs, turn it on it's hot quick, turn it off its cool in a minute and they almost always burn out faster than you expect. women are like irons, turn it on and it takes a while to get hot enough to do the job at hand, turn it off and it'll still be hot a long time after, and they seem to last forever. most men need to learn how to iron!
  10. now?

    now? Member

    BUY A GOOD VIBRATOR--let her use it on herself while you two are having sex, or you are licking her or whatever.

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