need help interpreting an undefined "urge"

For the last several months, ive felt a growing desire to push my limits (physically and mentally), and find and odd contentment in the feeling of the oncoming 'crash". Unfortunately, I recognise that any attempts at sleep deprivation would not go well with a university schedule, and am stuck feeling a bit too "bland".

this is not in anyway a depressive thing. Its more a desire for something spontaneous and/or random. I have the attitude of 'why not, in the end itll be SOO worth it"

However, I have an irritating trait of not being very outgoing unless "pushed". My voice of reason doesnt like to be muted...

In the fall, I will be attending burning man, where i plan to push all my limits, mentally and physically, for a week. i think this is what I need, but is only a single event.

any input on this? felt i may stick it out there and see if theres any good ideas

 

burning man, i am so jealous

i would not think of this urge as some neurosis or whatever

rather, it is your deepest Self, seeking to know itself better

we only really know ourselves at the edges, right

what you are feeling is healthy, and i encourage it

 

oh, i definitely encourage it. unfortunately, my "logic" tends to prevent me from "letting go". I want to do something impractical, yet my mind doesnt want me to... :SIm the guy who you cant really tell if drunk OR stoned. on either substance, i just get a bit more chill and hang slightly outside the circle of people.My goal this summer is to make a good job, go to burning man, and who knows? maybe ill try to travel around the country for a few weeks? (but then, "logic" tells me that will use most of my summer, and i wont make as much money...see what i mean?)

 

it's not a situation of "or"

it's not

I can do X *or* I can do Y

it's a situation of And.

I can go to burning man, change my life forever, *and* i can make some money

or no money

it's ok either way

don't miss the forest for the trees

 

Increase dose.

 

hahaha pretty much

you need to be shown, very profoundly, how small, limited, and limiting logic is

its a human mental invention

 

logic can tell you that by enjoying yourself with travel or long festivals, you will have less time to earn money.

but it cant tell you which option is better

 

why not?...i plan on doing alot of thrid eye stuff this summer, as for now iam getting my shit togehter and plan on getting as mentally clean as possible and then its off to space :cheers2:...good luck in your decison and have fun !

 

one more thing i say go with your instinct, my insticnt is tellling me to wait so thats what iam going to do...if you have an urge to do something then why the fuck not do it lol

 

call it the "human condition"