My lifes passing in nothingness...

And i feel guilty as hell about it. Every day passes really quickly, and at the end of it ill have done absolutley nothing. Im currently in college studying to become a translator, but ive been there for 2 years now and have another 6 months or so before my course is over. Every day in that place is the same. All my friendships have faded into disinterest. I dont do much work...i just sleep, daydream, drink...

The daydreamings a big problem. Ill spend hours sitting on my bed just thinking, or drawing pictures or writing poetry. Im in a relationship at the moment but my boyfriends away because of family probs...I do have plans for the future, but...God...jus seems im in a period of stasis at the moment.

Anyway, there, its admitted

Love-Maxi.Xx

 

"And i feel guilty as hell about it. Every day passes really quickly, and at the end of it ill have done absolutley nothing."- Unless you do something really outstanding, nobody will remember you when you die anyway.

"All my friendships have faded into disinterest."- You sound depressed.

"I dont do much work...i just sleep, daydream, drink..."- Minus drink thats great.

"The daydreamings a big problem. Ill spend hours sitting on my bed just thinking, or drawing pictures or writing poetry."- Cool, try writing stories and your thoughts and stuff too.

"I do have plans for the future, but...God...jus seems im in a period of stasis at the moment."- You don't seem to have much stress in your life, based on what you said here.

 

Just think time will improve your life, because it will.

 

Your looking at things in the wrong light. Okay, so maybe you don't solve cancer, global warming, or some other world-wide epedimic on a daily basis, but you do learn somthing new every day right? You act like drawing and writing poetry is a bad thing. But hey, at least your doing somthing artistic with your spare time, Instead of, say, zoning out in front of the Tv or wasting free time on video games. Your in college, your young, and you havn't even started your carrer. Stop worrying so much over things, go have some fun, productivity comes later in life.

 

Yeah i think youve got it right, im a worrier. And i always think too big, too...i want to be going through major life changes and to be changing the world, but youre right, and it just wont happen. Not now at least.

Thanx for the advice that really helped actually.

Love-Maxi.Xx

 

Hope youre right

Xx

 

Well, its not really a case of wanting to be remembered. I just want to make a difference, really.

I dont think im depressed. Ive been through real depression and it felt a lot worse than this. Its more just...numbness?nothingness, boredom.

Yeah thats a good idea with the writing i do love to write.

and no, not a lot of stress at all...which is maybe why im worried. Im used to stress. But youre right, things are good its jus me bein impatient and wantin to get out there and really live, i guess.

Thanx,
Love-Maxi.Xx

 

hi verseau_miracle,
i remember being sad and depressed when i was l7 years old. it was kinda a troubled time for me, l7 is between being a teen and being an adult. you're getting ready to graduate from high school and not really know what lies ahead of you in that big old world. in 1965, when i graduated alot was going on. president kennedy was killed in 63, and the viet nam war was raging, the world was in a uproar from protests and upheaval, just like it is today. we have the iraqi war, a president that is destroying our foreign policy, so much trauma and political unrest and all the hurricanes/tornadoes, ect. it can be very scarry in todays world. i found during my lifetime that the times i felt the most vulnerable were in times like these.

i also have always felt that there was something i was supposed to do to help heal the world, that there was a greater purpose to my life. i was raised with alot of guilt and abuse so i thought everything was my fault and that i had to save the world. now, at 58 years old, and after a lot of health problems, cause i was always so nervous and kinda scared, i have finally realized that all i have to do is take care of myself, be strong and just do what i can in my little part of the world. if i can be a loving and peaceful person, try not to harm anyone and love myself, that is really all that is required of me. i am a free-lance writer and that really helps me feel like i am contributing. i write political essays, stories, ect to newspapers, magazines. i don't make a living doing this, just a hobby. i am also a poet and that is very theraputic.

so if you are feeling sad and don't have a direction in your life, i would suggest a support group, meditation, yoga, spiritual guidance, anything to help you find true love for youself, that to me is the most important love. if you have self-love you will find love, for you will shine brightly to all creatures great and small.
hippiewise