- Mushroom Magic trip report -

Discussion in 'Magic Mushrooms' started by RELAYER, Jan 20, 2009.


    RELAYER mādhyamaka

    Namaste! I’ve been inspired to finally write out a trip report from last year due to Mr. Writer’s thread detailing how he’s discovered that magic mushrooms bring the most profound experience known to man. I’ll be honest before I begin and admit that there are many revelations which came to me that I either can’t remember (due to intensity) or I am still struggling to settle into.

    This trip took place last summer shortly after my wife came up to Philadelphia to stay with me from the Dominican Republic, and it was her first mystical experience with psychedelics as well as my own most powerful experience to date. Believe it or not, the Cube’s came as a hand down through one of the members of the Bloodhound Gang, so that right there is reason enough to expect nothing but pure, ridiculous insanity.

    My neighbor upstairs, a lifelong friend, grabbed a ½ oz. and split a ¼ with a friend (drummer I used to play with) and made a tea in their apartment, while my wife and I split ¼ and ate them as is, drinking the caps and stems down. My son had gone to bed and the light was soft, mostly the glow of the muted television in the bedroom and a weak light over the kitchen. We sat in the living room immediately after ingestion, her on an easy chair and myself on a small couch L shaped next to each other.

    I remember in less than 5 minutes, we were talking to each other and I suddenly had my vision split as if between two inhabitants, one source of perception was looking at her talk and hearing the words, and the other was at about a 45 degree angle (using her as the base of reference) behind and beyond my head, sort of like I was both aware of my physical eyes observing her and aware of myself from behind myself. As quick as this strange disconnection came about, it disappeared and I felt forced back into my body again; I recall remarking to her how bizarre I felt in detailing the sudden split.
    Shortly after this we both started to get goofy and slippery with the typical visuals; bubbling carpets, breathing walls, dual vision going into each other and back out etc. We went out front to sit on the cement steps and have a smoke, and my two friends from upstairs came around the corner to join us, both with plastered stupid smiles and babbling on about nonsense.

    While we were bullshitting there, a massive thunderstorm (minus the rain) came in out of nowhere, and we were all standing on the hill next to the house watching the night sky burst open with lightning and sparkling rainbows streaking across the sky. The sound of the thunder roared past and I could feel my entire body reverberate with the force, like amplified bass at a concert in a modest hall. Needless to say the 4 of us were all pretty blown away by Nature’s welcome display, but as it got too intense and the grip of the mushrooms put pressure on us, we split up again and Aura (my wife) and I went back inside to take a moment of silence and reflection.

    We sat on the floor facing my exposed kitchen stove, which I used as a back wall for my prayer/meditation altar. At the time I had a painting of Parvati devi hanging, some incense burners and candles, flowers that I picked daily on my way home from work in offering, and some other small spiritual figures. At first, a bunch of random silliness went down, trying to catch the cat like a fish, laughing at the values society holds collectively, but then we went into a lotus posture facing Parvati and the weirdness began to sink in.

    The last moment of coherent clarity was looking down into my hands which were put together the way Christians and Hindus pray, and in between my fingers was the expected blooming neon spiral effect, but as I gazed into it, I realized I was seeing such enhanced microscopic detail that I was convinced to be staring into the molecular level (Bhuloka), then the subatomic (Bhuvarloka), and as this zooming effect continued pushing my depth perception with deeper force I thought to myself “Wow, this is too much, I should not be able to see this” and suddenly my vision went into an interstellar void. This is when I noticed that my left hand went numb, like pins and needles, and I felt it slowly advance up through my arm and shoulder, across my chest, and spread from there into every extremity. All of my limbs and head were buzzing and burning with increasing pain and I fell back to the floor into violent convulsions with flashing psychedelic lights replacing my absence of sight. I realized that I was having a seizure, but had never before gone through more than mild brain ‘jump starts’, and as the pain moved from the level of terrible discomfort to unbearable anguish, my first thought was that I had eaten poisoned mushrooms and should call poison control, but I became aware that I was entirely paralyzed and was going in and out of seizures, rendered helpless and entirely immobile.

    What would happen between the seizures was that I would quickly regain awareness of my body but I was seeing dreamscape imagery as if my eyes were closed, and this first came about accompanied by a vision of looking into my hands again (while I was clearly sprawled out on the floor) and again observing the neon dots, but as my hands unfolded, I saw a flower bloom in between, which turned into my mother’s legs parting during my own birth, reality itself split in half, and the seizure came back.

    The next time it subsided, I had visions of my past incarnations, and I was shown all of the evils, greed and obsessions I had accumulated and assimilated through progession, gambling, killing in wars, vengeful attempts left unfulfilled, and so on. I believe I was able to communicate something to Aura during this moment, but I have no idea what I may have said.
    Another vision included the both of us as we were in reality, but we were moving our bodily positions both in posture and in location in what brought feelings of colliding ancient memories of tribal ritual and feng shui, and what was composing my consciousness felt as if it was being directly manipulated by a spirit, though I was and still am confused as to the nature of and intent behind what I perceived to be spirit.

    After this came yet another vision, only this was more of an emotional/spiritual sensation rather than a visual one. There was a state of transcendence attained, I knew that God, whatever God is, had localized itself and was seated in front of and beyond me, at the same 45 degree angle in relation to my split senses of self from earlier in the trip, but I was unable to look up at it because of a brilliancy of light which physically and mentally hurt to look at. In this moment, I saw everything collapse, first Aura and I became as symbolic of human evolution and went backwards, I felt like I was experiencing the compassion of Jesus dying on the cross, the blood of Abraham coursed through me like blackened water and made me fall ill, I was Krishna’s disciple, I was Adam stepping back into the Garden as ignorance is bliss, I was animals, single celled organisms, the elements, and then I watched as material creation closed up and the big bang went in reverse back into spirit, first with light reversing and then space finally arriving at the nothing. The initial emanation of light, the utterance of Aum from Brahma, and then silence.

    I don’t remember anything from this state, but just as creation went back in, it banged right back out again, life of the collective biosphere and noospheric collective receptivity flashed before my eyes as reality happened again in an instant, evolution unfolded again, and Aura and I were back in our bodies looking into each others eyes and I knew that we had both just watched the same thing. The look in her eyes was like looking in my eyes, I could see infinity reflected reaching out for something or someone to make sense of it, and then the seizure struck me once again.

    When I finally awoke the seizure seemed to have left me for good, and I assumed that what had just happened was the peak, but I had no concept of time with which to judge my position in reality. I got up off the floor and immediately thought of my son, how I needed to just go be next to him and experience familiarity of the sober love kind, so I walked into the room and sat on the bed next to him. Just as I did, he woke up and looked at me, and I literally watched time go in reverse, he fell back asleep, I went backwards in time and was back out on the floor again. I stood up and again walked towards the bedroom, increasingly becoming aware that I was not in control of my body and can only describe the experience as the most powerful sense of déjà vu imaginable, so intense that I was convinced that I was being shown how reality is programmed entirely and that free will is an imaginative gesture on humanities part in coming to terms with God. Anyway, after I went through the process of sitting next to my son and watching him wake up again, I went into the kitchen to pour him a bottle of milk only to find that after putting the milk back in the refrigerator, the same reverse-time process happened again and I was back in his room, thinking of how I should go get him milk, followed through with it, again, totally out of control of my actions, and brought him the milk. To keep it short, this happened over and over again and I began to panic, thinking to myself that I am dreaming, none of this is actually happening, am I laying on the floor? Am I trapped in a thought bubble of potentiality which keeps playing out possible scenarios for my waking state?

    I have to cut this off for the moment because Im at work but will finish it later. Had to leave out a bunch of visions and waves of confusing spiritual communications which were bombarding me that I may include as well.
    Namaste -
  2. salmon4me

    salmon4me Senior Member

    Holy crap, those were some good shrooms huh?:) Nice trip report so far.:cool:

    RELAYER mādhyamaka

    Yea lol, must have had some voodoo magic layed on 'em :tongue:
    I'll keep going, but probably not until after work
  4. bekyboo52

    bekyboo52 52~unknown~52

    nice.... i've never eaten a 1/4... i only got to the 3 g point....

    RELAYER mādhyamaka

    I've eaten nearly a full ounce dried, but this was 1/4 split between my wife and I, so it was just over 3grams. I've eaten well over 1/4 tons of times, but never had such mind fuck as this trip lol. And they were regular cubes, the time I ate the ounce included a few Psilocybe Cyanescens and didnt even come close. It's all about where you are at mentally, wether or not you are able to give in and die to see what there is. I had always assumed I was for years and well over 150 mushroom trips, but boy was I wrong :tongue:
    God bless -
  6. Wow, sounds beautiful.
    I am yet to experience anything other that marijuana and alchohol.
  7. Autentique

    Autentique wonderfabulastic

  8. Monkey Boy

    Monkey Boy Senior Member

    Wow, that sounds intense. I've experienced the split visuals (45 degree angle) before. It was exactly how you described it. How did you keep your calm during the seizures? I think I would have panicked. Nice report so far. :)
  9. Mr.Writer

    Mr.Writer Senior Member

    I wrote some words, but saw this and knew this was one of those times i should shut up and point to something
  10. DroneLore

    DroneLore h8rs gon h8, I stay based

    My thoughts exactly.

    The way you fluttered in and out of consciousness/visions reminds me of the first time I tripped mush, except nothing as intense as seizures (that would have really freaked out me out), but I would drift from relative coherence to a state where I was essentially oblivious to my surroundings, groaning and trying to put my fist in my mouth.

    RELAYER mādhyamaka

    Interesting! I've never heard of anyone else having that split before, how cool :D
    But to be honest, during the seizures, I've never been in so much pain and fear in my life. Not
    even close, I truly thought I was dying from poison, not like ego death I mean I just wanted to
    have a nice trip with my wife and share the love lol, and next thing you know we both think we
    are really about to die. I wish I could claim that I was in fact able to remain calm, but the
    truth is that I was flipping in turmoil in my head, but was so paralyzed with the pain that I
    didnt even have the option to run wild. Pretty much any movement I made was rolling over from
    one side of my body to the other, sort of like when you have the flu or alcohol poisoning.

    RELAYER mādhyamaka

    Yea, I get the in-out dreamy effect when I trip alone mostly, because I used to eat a few full mushrooms and lay down on the floor in my old room and let the visions take me without interruption from the external world.
    But yea I dont know why I got the seizures, of course I've had multiple methaphysical speculations, but this was very real and very painful. I dont have epilepsy and I've not since had a waking seizure (Ive had plenty during hypnagogic states from opiates and sleeping on my back though).
    Honestly it made me have so much respect for mushrooms that my entire perception of what they are and what purpose they serve changed dramatically, but for awhile I feared that I would never grow the balls to try them again. I think Im ready now though, I just needed a long time to let the peices come together only to realize that there is just no way to know what it was I communed with, we can only accept it and be thankful for being allowed to live afterwards :tongue:

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