Most Men Don't Practice Chivalry, Why???

I'm sure, if I took a poll, most of the women would say that they've come across very few men who practice chivalry at all. Let's talk REAL LIFE. I mean how many men actually do these things for ladies?

I was told that a woman must DEMAND men to do things like open doors for them and carry bags, but why should these things that should just come natural be DEMANDED? Seems to me that if he wanted to do these things a woman wouldn't have to demand anything.

I don't want anybody doing anything for me that doesn't WANT to do it. Demanding a guy to treat you like a lady is like forcing him to do it.....why should I have to force a MAN TO BE A MAN???

And guys always say, they don't like it, when a woman says, she's independent. But we HAVE to be, when it comes to chivalry. If we don't do it for ourselves, it won't get done.

Look around you people. When you're out in the street, how many men do you actually see practicing chivalry? I see more NOT doing it, than I see doing it.

Now...let's keep it real!!!

 

you're really into gender roles and stereotypes aren't you?


I'm not a guy who practices chivalry. Its not a conscious decision on my part to not 'be a man' (in your terms) - its just not me. My girlfriend sometimes has a problem with this and because I want to make her happy, I do what makes her happy most of the time, opening the car door etc - chivalry in your terms. Sometimes I forget though as I can be rather oblivious to the world - i.e. space shot. Like I said though, I always want her to be happy, so if something as simple as opening the door for her makes her happy, then I'm going to be thinking about that and do it most of the time.

that being said, I really don't care for gender roles. I don't have any expectations of my girlfriend to do certain things because 'that's what a women is supposed to do'


So let me turn this around on you. If you expect 'chivalry' from a man, in return does your man come home to a sparkling clean house, dinner on the table with clean and pressed laundry ready for his next day at work?

 

Micheal, I'm mildly amused that you paint yourself in this thread to be a man who wants to treat your mate like a 'goddess queen', that you indeed are a man who practices chivalry, yet you just posted a thread about all the women you want to fuck. seems rather contradictory to me

 

um, why is having doors opened for you important? I mean, don't yank it shut in someones face and yes, it's nice to hold it open a couple seconds longer so the person behind you can catch it - but I do that for guys and girls, and both girls and guys do it for me. Just courtesy, not chivalry. I don't expect a guy to hold a door for me and I think it's rather ridiculous. Nor do I expect them to stand when I enter a room, pull out my chair, or fight to the death for my honour.

 

Whatever. Sorry feminism. If I am with someone I expect them to treat me well. I agree a real man will hold the door for you.

 

umm yea right. thats an old thing that they did while they didn't let women vote or anything like that. I mean like it is good to hold the door for other people but i do it for boys or girls or whoever. its just being nice. thats a realy dumb stereotype and as that dude said gender role

 

Well, I can see your point Micheal.

I guess my whole contention with this thread is that it is very gender specific

Tarzan is 'supposed' to do this (is what BrownTripleQQ is saying)

and hence I assume

Jane is 'supposed' to that


To me that's bullshit. I may not always open the door for lynsey, but that doesn't make me any less of a man because 'that's what men are supposed to do'. She doesn't always do the things that in the same line of thought 'women are supposed to do' and I honestly don't expect her to nor really care if she does. I really have zero expectations of her to do anything because 'that's what a woman is supposed to do'

There certainly are many personality traits that I desire in my lover and once those are met and we are together, all I really desire is great conversation and intense intimacy - I could give a shit if she does the things that 'women are supposed to do'

 

I wouldn't like my boyfriend opening car doors for me. I have arms and hands and opposable thumbs, I can do it myself. I do think it's a bit rude if a guy is in front of me and doesn't open the door for me, but I think it's rude if a girl doesn't do the same thing either. I've been brought up to say please and thank you to EVERYONE.. so much that lunch ladies give me extra food because they're impressed (not kidding..), so I always open doors for anyone behind me naturally and expect the same courtesy shown to me.

Why should a woman compromise her strength and power as a woman just so men can be chivalrous? It bothers me to think that men are expected to carry bags and open doors SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY'RE MEN. On the same coin, does that mean that women are expected to cook dinner for their husband/boyfriend every night and clean up alone while answering his every wish while he drinks beer in front of the tv? Gender roles are pointless.

 

I USED to open doors for women/carry their bags/pull out chairs for them. NO FUCKING MORE.

A few of them I did open doors for/carry their laundry/groceries to their car said "What do I look like, some helpless woman? Men always treat women like theyre weak and stupid. I don't want you helping me, it makes you feel big and strong doesn't it?"

Know what I say to a woman who asks me to do something like that for her now? "Fuck you, do it yourself." I'm tired of getting stepped on by calous bitches. You want equality? You got it!

Edit: Sorry if I seem really heartless, but women have been taking advantage of my kindness/stepping on me/lying to me my whole life. A woman should be able to do things herself...and if she can't, I say fuck off.

 

you actually tell people to fuck off when they ask for your help? That's just... awful. How do you know they haven't pulled a muscle or have some other problem that makes it difficult for them to carry all that stuff? I mean, I carry my groceries home by myself but there have been times where my arms were so sore to start with I was amazed I managed to get home with all my groceries, and that's only two blocks to walk.

 

I do find myself to be very chivalrous. I still hold doors, open a door for a woman to let her out of the car, offer protection from rain, always let her order first at a restaurant....I have always believed in chivalry; always will.

 

What about just being pollite to your feelow human?
I open doors for men, sometimes they open doors for me, same with women, its not about chivalry, its about courtesy and consideration.

It would be damn rude for a guy to open a door for a woman and then slam it in a guys face, same for a woman.

I think men dont practice chivalry anymore because they don't know where they stand. Modern women in many ways havesteered them away from it, some women are offended when a man opens a door for her because she sees it as chauvenist practice.

If we all just treated eachother with respect and courtesy, there wouldnt even be this question

 

Cause most men are ass-holes!

 

You have quite a skewed perspective don't you? And I mean that in the worst possible way.

 

It's no big deal whether or not a guy opens the door for me or pulls out my chair. I think nowadays it's all about equality...if a guy DOES open the door for me, I reciprocate the action he took by unlocking the driver's door for him. It's about being NICE. I open doors for men, women, children...etc.

It's not a big deal like it used to be. It doesn't make me feel differently about a person if they hold doors open for me or not. I don't know...it's not that big of a deal to me.

 

old ladies are made of molten lava from the depths of hell

 

To me I think if I was with a guy that always did that it would get annoying quick cause it shows he thinks and beleaves in gender roles. Which I will not accept from someone I'm planning on spending most of my life with. Like if they where to always help just women carry things but not a guy. Why do that? Just because I have tits and a vagina I suddenly can't lift something? Now, helping someone that you can tell is having a hard time lefting/carrying something, not based on thier gender then that's fine cause that's just being nice to a person that needs some help. Same with a person was to open the door for a person, just because they where there or they had thier hands full, and not based on thier gender. Then that's fine with me. That's just being nice. I don't freak out on guys on the street if they offer to help carry something. I don't know if they do it for men and women or just women. Most of the time I just say "no thank you, but thanks for the offer". But I just don't trust people enough to carry my stuff. Who knows if they might take it and run. It's happened before. If they hold the door for me I say thank you. And if there's another door in front of me (you know how some stores, resturants, whatever have two doors?) I hold it open for them. But with the doors I have had about the same amount of women and me hold the door for me. And I do it both to women and men.
To me though it doesn't matter if the person opens the door or not, offer to help if I'm holding something really heavy, or they pull out my chair. I won't think less of a person if they don't and I won't think more of the person if they do.

 

All I do is give and give and give, and get NOTHING in return, not even a "thank you", and thats all I ask for. I'm tired of people taking advantage of me, and lying to me..thats all people ever do in my life. Someone wants some help? Fuck them, they can do it themselves...I'm never helping anyone ever again, and thats just the way it is. Sorry.

 

Then don't ever expect anyone to help you. Not trying to be mean to you or anything just being honest. I've seen so many people that say they give up on helping others but then they expect people to help them.

 

I dont ask anyone to help me. I do everything on my own, like always. I dont trust people to do something, because they always let me down.