We are buying a house (which mean we will have a yard where we will actually live for a number of years), and my due date for the baby that died is coming up in August, and I would like to plant a tree. The difficulties in this are that a) DH being the sensitive bastard that he his, actually scoffed at the idea. But screw him I'll plant my own tree...but b) I am really, really bad with green things. Does anyone have any ideas for hardy, easy to plant/care for trees that could be my memorial? We live in KY, so it's a pretty warm climate. Thanks in advance. This miscarriage is still hurting me, maybe even more as I get closer to my due date. And one of my close friends is due a week before I was. I hate to say it, but I am glad we don't live close; it would be too hard to watch her belly grow. NOBODY gets that it hurts still. And if no one else is going to care, I can at least have my own little memorial tree to visit. Of course, I hope that doesn't die too.....sigh. Sorry, I'm a downer. Tiffany
*hugs* Plant your tree if it makes you feel better. The best way to go is probably, if you buy a tiny tree, because raising one from seed is where the most mistakes happen. Make a visit to one of these gardening stores, that also have greenhouses, ask them what will grow best in your climate, and what is easy to care for. Heal, sister! Love, tanja
I also think this is a truly beautiful idea. Like Kastenfrosh said, go to a green house and ask them what they think is best. I just moved back to Canada from S. Ohio, and there are a lot of options open to you and your blessed climate! One of my favorites is the Yellow Poplar, i don't know how fussy it is... but it is native to your area!
I live up North, and I don't know what grows well in your area. Magnolias are beautiful. Do they grow well in the South? A bush might be nice, too. There is a type of rose called a "Fairy Rose" which is about impossible to kill. You only have to trim the runners every spring. You get beautiful flowers. I got very weepy when the babies I lost had their due dates. And with the first miscarriage, I was actually pregnant at the due date. I was crying all morning and couldn't figure out what was wrong, and then I realized that it was the poor thing's due date. I felt bad, because I had Moon in me, and she wouldn't have been here if I hadn't lost the other pregnancy. You'll get through it. The first due date is the worst, and then it gets better. Blessings.
That sounds really sweet. Some cousins of mine in Socttland were having a baby, which she carried to term and then about a week before the due date, the baby stopped moving. She was induced and held him for a while before he was taken away. After this happened, the mom asked that all family and friends plant snow drops in honor of him. I think that it's a really important thing to do. It helps the healing process and it's like you're watching your child grow in the form of something else.
