Make An Absurd Description Of The Last Object Posted

I will describe my salt shaker.

High blood pressure in a bottle.

.

Doors

 

teleportation devices that put you right back in the same place


rocking chair

 

A device that you ride to the exact location that you are already at.


Automobile

 

Large metallic conveyance that implies an inverse relationship to the size of the driver's dick.

Malanga

 

A word that can not be looked up because of shitty internet and jobs to do.

Astroturf

 

Outdoor carpet that you don't need to vacuum.

Scottish Kilt

 

Big fat cock cover

Box of tissues

 

Things that are advertised to be used for cleaning up snot and tears but get used for cleaning up loads of other messy things.

Socks

 

A pair of hats for your feet.

Motivational posters

 

Put up by employers to remind those they promoted that they got where they are for being as stupid and unmotivated as they a ... I mean a fine way of improving workplace productivity.

Interstellar dust.

 

well, it revolves around its sun many times looking for someone's nostrils to keep house, until those nostrils sneeze it back into orbit again


black holes

 

Universal vacuum cleaners

Clouds

 

fluffy beings floating around to make people smile, only they get sad sometimes and tear rain

computers

 

portals to an absurd dimension




cheese

 

Delicious when firm, as well as creamy. Sometimes smells like feet after a long day. Women love it, even though they won't always admit it out loud.

Paste

 

sticky thicky

the ocean

 

the best place to swim naked unless a fish bites off dangling bits of the anatomy.

music

 

stuff young people will never fully understand







cream of mushroom soup

 

Nasty seman looking food that often gets mistaken for snot.

Fun dip

 

always fun until you open it and see you picked one with a broken stick





a leaf rake with broken handle