Love at first sight, or did you run in fright?

How did you first respond when you met your spouse or significant other?

For me, it was RUN IN FRIGHT. LOL. I didn't actually run away from him but when I saw him, I had this gut reaction to stay away from him. He was across the room and there was no interaction. He didn't even look my way. Yet I had this internal warning to stay away from him. Several years later we became friends and dated. Married a short while later. We've been together almost a decade.

How about you? Any other "run in frights" out there?

 

"Run in fright" used to be my initial reaction to any relationship. The dating was fine, the second it got serious I was out of there. My first two relationships only worked because A) he was super patient and sat through many panic attacks and B) I already lived with the guy and literally could not leave.

My current partner and I have only been together for three months now, but he's the first person I've felt no inclination to run from. Not that it was love at first sight or anything, but he's always felt "safe".

Only time will tell if that means something, but I'll let you know once we've been together a decade haha.

 

Very cool question. Ive always run when it comes to matters of attraction. A past regret i guess. Luckly ma current partner was very patient and didnt mind me being dead silent to begin with. Know he sometimes wrestles to shut me up. . Im glad tht despite u being hesitant at first, your now have something vry beutiful im ur life. :sunny:

 

I'm curious though, when you first spoke, first started dating etc, how did the "run in fright" response disappear? Did you just have to talk to him for it to feel safer or did it take several weeks?

 

@ Abyssinian i tottally get wer u are coming from. with my current bf, i kinda knez i liked him. we really connected, but when we became a couple i went all weird, quite n scared .

 

I only had that response the first time I saw him (at work). A couple of years passed and we worked the same shift and became friends. He fell for me but I was clueless. A couple of months later, I fell for him and we began dating.

I learned later that he was in a bad relationship during the time I first saw him.

 

I wonder if that's where your bad feelings were coming from! That's the best kind of intuition haha, "... and that guy there is in a bad relationship and should be avoided." The kind of intuition everyone should have. x)

 

Run in fright, usually.
One guy was set up to have a coffee with me by a mutual friend so I knew he was going to ask. Our work place set us up to train others on a long machine just because we knew the job as it happened not long after our friend started the whole thing.
Turned out both of our trainees were taking it on quickly so neither of us had anything to do but watch em. He asked me to go with him for an unscheduled break because we were allowed usually to wander off if things were stopped or running well so we did. We took a walk outside the building and after some casual talk he started to ask me for a coffee date and I said "Ok, see ya back inside" and he wasn't gonna let that go. He said "come back, I have a question for you" and so we dated as intended for a coffee which the date went on for the next 48 hours, it was a match and we both knew it.
BF now, I met online, usually I met guys in a work situation but this time once I knew I needed someone back in my life I went on a dating site because my work kinda makes it hard to just meet people now. So I met a few, jerks looking for meat, lying about their age, married or not done with their old relationships, and then this guy had similar interests so we talked lots in text and email, then I dumped him. He waited and flagged me later. We yakked again electronically and finally met.
Why I run I have no idea, it's not to piss them off, it's just me thinking something could go wrong, it's too good to be true and I want nothing to do with it but somehow I do manage to run into peeps like me and they seem to know they did too I guess. BF laughs about it, he was never offended, he just knew if it was meant to be his next attempt would work out, if not he would have let it go or tried once more later and then let it go. He just didn't want to give up without trying first. Once we met in person I felt better and it happened. Online was something I had never done before so it was kinda spooky for me.

 

It's interesting because when we watch those romantic movies, it's always the guy running. But, in real life, from my observations of others, it's always the girl running.

 

It was neither for me. We met, didn't get along very well but had to see each other almost every day for 5 months so kept our distance. Met again about 4 months later and it was kind of like love at whatever sight. We hit if off and we've been together ever since. That was almost 18 years ago.

 

My current girl friend i fell in love with from first sight. I was working on a farm and she arrived as a volunteer worker and as i was foreman at the time i was in charge of new workers xD. This made it a little hard and exciting at the same time. I never wanted to run though i just felt i HAD to be with this woman no matter what, so i tried my hardest and was very successful xD I used to be very scared of many things when i was still teenager but my father was a very determined and very often cheeky man. He would always ask people for things or try different things, and if it failed would just reply with things like "hey, if you dont ask you dont get" or "nothing ventured nothing gained" and would never be embarrassed or anything just laugh it off and continue onwards this helped me alot.

 

If I were to fall in love on first sight, I'd have to make an appt to get my eyes checked. Then I'd probably make a psych appt. To find out what he heck I was thinking.
Seriously, I'd be cautious, let it happen naturally. If the other person is feeling it, you can usually tell.