Lets all together tell a story

Old cemetery behind her house. The fairy then brought all of the corpses to life and the wierdest sickest necro-orgy ever ensued. When it was over it was all she could do just to......

 

Keep in her enthusiastic thanks for the hours of great love-making. When she was finally able to leave (after the cheery hugs from half-decomposed old men), she left through the cemetery gate and walked the couple blocks home. She was pretty sure that no one had seen the disturbing site; but a couple weeks later a very grotesque video was released on the internet. She sat back in shock as she saw herself in the middle of dozens of horny zombies on her computer monitor...

 

so she sued the corpses for sexual harrassment, but when presesnted with the odd case, the judge put her in a mental institution where she got a lobotomy, and her Indian firend had to kill her with a pillow and escape to Canada

 

The Indian man had lived happily in Canada for years, but missed some of his family, so decided to make a covert trip back into America for a few weeks. Unfortunately he was intercepted half way to the reservation and put in prison for his old charges, and the new peyote charges.

 

Halfway to the to the prison, Chicken-Jesus came and laid the biggest cleveland steamer in front of the prison van and freed the prisoners. The prisoners then made thier way to the Valley of the Reclining God when all of a sudden....

 

...they all lived happily ever after.

But that's not the end. Oh no, no sir it's not!

See, there was this cow who decided she was a goldfish dreaming she was a cow dreaming she was a little girl licking ice cream and talking to a goldfish, who in turn was dreaming she was a cow dreaming she was a little girl licking ice cream and talking to a goldfish, who in turn was dreaming...

 

that he was playing golf with Godzilla and Abraham Lincoln while John Lennon caddied. Godzila got made because he kept hitting the ball to far, so he ate Abe and came after the goldfish, who by this point didn't know what was a dream and wasn't so he just stood their and Godzilla ate him. In the stomach of Godzilla The Goldfish met Sylvester Stalone and said "so that's where you went". And Stalone said "Something I can punch" so he punched the goldfish so ahrd that...

 

he flew even farther into the stomach. there he met prine albert.( yes were going thriugh the whole prince albert thing again. ask vegout he'll tell you the story.) they talked for a while then they heard a noise. it was...

 

Godzilla farting, so they flew out of Godzilla covered in...stuff, saw they were in someplace where they dint know. SO they went around asking people where they were. One guy was very nice and brought them to his house, and gave them some tea, which tasted funny, and made them want to have sex with the man, but as the man picked up a knife, the police came in and...

 

hold on are we talkin about the real police or the band. ill make it the band.

they started to strip dance and have a blast. but then the real police came and spulled out there guns. then, being brave, albert steps up and said...

 

plase take me away. I hate the Police, and Sting is naked over their, and kills calling me over their. So the Police arrested Albert, but he told them thats not what he ment, so he had to devise a way to break out of jail. so he got a wire hanger, an alarm clock, and a par of dice and...

 

he built a time machine. yes i know those are not time machine building materials but its all we got. sooooo, he went all the way back to the year...

 

0. and landed on some guy with a beard. The guy looked pretty hurt so ALbert said. Hey who are you. Are you OK. the guy said "I'm Jesus you Dibshit. And I have a 5 o'clock preaching. I'm not gonna be able to make it now. You have to go. So Albert bought a fake beard and some white robes and went to the preaching and said. "When i was back their in seminary school, their was a person their who brought firth the proposition that you can petition the lord with prayer, petition the lord with prayer... YOU CAN NOT PETITION THE LORD WITH PRAYER." and all the people said...

 

sure we can. and albert as fake jesus said you know im just not gonna listen to any more prayers so there. and all the people started to

 

Jesus betrayed us. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. SO then the real Jesus came with a crutch and said "good lord, what did you say." and Albert said "you know that song the Soft Parade" and Jesus said no. and Albert said. "well if you don't listen to The Doors who do you listen to, but at that moment the romans came and said. which one of you is the real Jesus, and Jesus pointed at Albert and said. Him, crucify him. So the romans did. and Jesus lived in the hills and went to the hipforums under the name VegOut024

 

then later on the romans found out that they crucified the wrong jesus. just as jesus sat down to relax he got a knock at the door. it was...

 

a stripper dressed as a roman soldier the stripper did his dance and rubbed his pee-pee in jesus' face and then they all went out to the stable where jesus turned water into wine, some sage into weed and they all had a huge paganistic orgy.

 

so jesus finally said "fuck dis" and he left the orgy. ok this story is totally messd up

 

...and as Jesus was leaving the stable God came down and said to him "Hmm...I really think you found something there with that weed." And so God planted seeds all around the world and labeled it as "God's Gift". That made Jesus mad that God took the credit and so he...

 

got really really really really really really high. he got so stoned that he forgot he was mad at god. so god took one look at the stoned jesus and said...