how come communes aren't trying to get more families involved in this lifestyle? or even single moms and their kids for that matter...?
A few random thoughts: A lot of communes have funny spirtitual ideas and maybe kids would be considered a distraction. There is also extra "overhead" with kids about... many communes can be hard work and time has to then be separated between care and providing for the children and working for the commune, this compromise may not be acceptable to many communes and maybe a cause of friction for some commune members. Having said that, the concept of a commune consisting of many parents and single mums sounds interesting, and would be a nice environment for the parents and children concerned if responsibly developed. I guess ultimatly it depends on what the commune is trying to achieve. It will probably be a more suitable environment for children when a commune is more established. Just thinking aloud! Anyway, enough of my wittering - there are plenty of communes that *are* kids-friendly. According to http://www.ic.org , over half are (54% to be exact - or 758 vs 642!).
I have totally skipped over the subject of education, and the concept of home schooling - though I think this is a whole subject in itself.
our place is made completely of single parents . 5 people over age 16 9 people 15 and under.... for us it works out fine the kids all have minor chores. like cutting hay for animals and other feed projects depending on age . and we all take turns taking the children to and from school. down here they dont bus children you go to the nearest school to where you live. so the older children usually walk to their own school and the younger children are taken by one of us. and for us we have found that the more parents we add to the communitity it makes things a little more easy on us all by having more people into the rotation for taking turns. and we prefer families with children because they usually have the childrens intrest in mind. and are not so wild as to do things to harm them. anyways thats my 2 cents opinions are like ass holes everybody has one
Hello folks - I rarely get a chance to write on the boards these days, what with taking care of a 7 month old and an 11 year old, doing customer service for our seed business, and being visitor liason for Acorn, but wanted to get a post out! Acorn Community has openings right now for all kinds of folks, but as a mom and a huge advocate of families in community, my personal interest lies in getting good families out here. We are especially interested in a family with a peer (perhaps 9-13) for our 11 year old girl - particularly a female peer who can hold her own with a lot of talking and energy and who isn't too into mainstream media stuff or being "cool." Those whose kids are not into being "cool" will know what I mean here...lol... My personal feeling is that Acorn would be a fantastic opportunity for a single mom of an older kid - as a former single mom myself, I know how difficult it can be to really want community but be unable to even get accepted for a visitor period at a community! For those who don't know, Acorn is an egalitarian IC about 8 miles from Twin Oaks, on 74 acres in rural Virginia. We run Southern Exposure Seed Exchange, an heirloom seed business, in addition to our farm. A few caveats: We have a good relationship with TO, but are very different! We are omnivorous, but the vast majority of our meals are vegan and vegetarian. We are much smaller (around 16 people), and work by formal consensus. We are far less organized and don't assign work, other than a once-every-two-weeks dishwashing shift. We don't have or want tv (we do have internet). We rarely have big parties, and the ones we have tend to be somewhat "nerdy," like our Fried Green Tomato party where we ate them while watching the movie. The huge upside to all this? The smaller size of Acorn allows for total involvement in all aspects of how the community works - our policies are always developing and are flexible for each personal/family situation. Our seed business was recently voted one of the top 15 seed companies in America by Mother Earth News, and is doing about 3x the business of this time last year - it's an ethical, environmentally sustainable way to earn a living and carry out activism at the same time. We are typically a friendly, laid-back, happy group, and try to address conflict as it occurs. We are also far more open to families than many IC's, and are actually actively seeking peers for our older child! Acorn is great for people who are independent and want a lot of personal freedom in their lifestyle, who are outgoing and friendly, people who are not much into mainstream media (aside from occasional video watching), who enjoy vegetarian/vegan meals, who can cope with some disorganization, who can work independently and who are looking for a close-knit, smaller, extended-family-type situation rather than a large institutional sort of thing. Acorn does have a website, but it is currently in the process of being completely overhauled, so if you look at it you can keep in mind that it is not really accurate (especially the members page and the part that says we aren't accepting kids). It's a good overview, though, and has some good pictures if they're working. www.ic.org/acorn - we're also listed in the communities directory at www.ic.org with a more current picture of the members. If you'd like to contact me, the best way is our community gmail account - acorncommunity@gmail.com - our regular mail has been dumping letters into junk for some reason. Or you can give me a call at 540-894-0595. Or just write back here! Spread the word, please - I am really working to increase the peer scene for our older child in particular, and am excited about welcoming more families into our community! Peace, Goody Weaver
We have all girls, the only problem is the oldest is 4, the middle 2 1/2, and the youngest is 2 months old. So joining a community would be very difficult but I feel like I am domesticating my children into the mainstream without really trying. They are hooked on tv, we try not to let them watch too much, a movie here and there (they are watching Fergully right now) and they aren't too crazy about the idea of always eating vegetarian which we are and my partner is vegan. So it's hard to say what will become of us. Maybe someday we will make it to an intentional community but for now, we are pretty much tethered to babylon one way or another.
acornweaver, why was your community initially not open to kids? Was this because it wasn't a really suitable environment during the early stages of the community, or someting else?
