Journal #64, September 10: How much I would like each gender to want me

I've been thinking lately about how much I would like each gender to want me.

Would I like a guy to want me, to think about me all the time fondly, to want to be around me, to touch himself to the thought of me and so on? And the answer is...no. As much as I wanna have fun with a guy, that's just not the attention I want from a guy, or wanna deal with from a guy. I guess it could be a nice ego boost in theory but the idea actually kind of repulses me. I would like a rockin' good time but insist afterwards we part ways and do our own thing, open to hooking up again maybe but still.

Would I like a girl to want me, to think about me all the time fondly, to want to be around me, to touch herself to the thought of me and so on? And the answer is...hell yes! I'm not holding my breath this will happen, but even if I wasn't interested it would be welcome. It would make me feel better about myself knowing someone's thinking about me in particular, that I'm special. It would make living feel worthwhile and enjoyable.

 

You probably stand a better chance getting that kind of attention from another guy. This begs the question of whether or not it really and truly matters as long as you feel special and that makes living feel worthwhile. Even if the guy just wanted hot, sweaty sex from you, wouldn't that make you feel better knowing that he's thinking about you and in some very carnal ways? That he's touching himself thinking about touching you again? And as funny as guys have been getting about giving up their body to another man, would you not feel special that he wants to be with you like that?

And I noticed that you said nothing about being in love and/or in an LTR, but you don't have to be involved with either thing in order to be wanted by someone and in a way that would make you feel special and living feel worthwhile and enjoyable... unless you'd care to expound on what you mean by "want?"

 

The thing is I really don't care to have that kind of attention from a guy. I'd like to have the fun no doubt, and I wanna know he wants the sex as much as I do, but in the long term that's all I crave from the same sex. But as far as craving me the person, beyond the hot, sweaty sex, I couldn't care less. The "want" is where the opposite sex really comes in.

 

You're talking about being in love with a side of LTR? Romantic attention versus purely sexual attention?

 

Not quite but something close, but that too. Not looking for a guy to be in love with me, or "in love" with me. Not a privilege and responsibility I see myself enjoying at all even before we begin to talk about how I'd feel about such a guy. Even with a girl I wouldn't want her feeling such deep feelings if I didn't feel the same. Wouldn't seem fair.
But to take a step back what I was really trying to describe was more of a longing, a feeling that someone is "special." I'd like a guy, or anyone else, to be into me when we're in the sack. That's the point of sex, isn't it? And I'd like the both of us (or however many of us are involved) to be looking forward to meeting if we agree to hook up on some date in the future. But I wouldn't want any guy to be too into me specifically. Maybe there could be something about me that turns him on but I'd like that to be it.
Of course time will tell how that plays out. Could go either way.

 

Thanks for that bit of clarity! I grew up thinking and believing that I could never, ever be into a guy in ways that weren't sexual... then I learned something new, that having a boyfriend who loved me and made me and my life even more special was one hell of an eye-opener on top of the other eye-opening things my bisexuality revealed to me and I was privileged to experience. At the same time, I had a wife and the mother of my children that made all of this better and dare I say interesting?

Jump ahead a lot of decades and experiences. I don't necessarily want or need, well, shit, anyone to fall in love with me and if they only want to be into the sex, I'm okay and used to it be it with a guy or a gal. I understand how people can get into their feelings and I'm not afraid or opposed to that because I can't do anything about how they feel... except to accept that this is how they feel about me and that's special and I'd already learned that life is worth living and can be enjoyable.

The sex or gender of the interested people isn't that big of a deal or, perhaps, it shouldn't be.

 

love this post…thank you for starting this ..,

Before we started this journey or earlier I wasn’t worried about this ….as we got into this hotwife cuck lifestyle I become notice the details and how would others desire me

as more more we became active …I began to transform how I looked and how I presented to opposite sex or same sex ….

I began ti work out …built body , worked on my peachy ass …my abs arms etc …I got lazer treatment done as I wanted smooth body for my opposite sex and same sex experience ….

my clothing became more fashion and attention grabbing as I wore tight cloths …..

As 33 man, feel soo proud of myself how i transformed myself to be craved by the sexy hunks and ladies …thanks to my wife who got me noticing and getting me competing with her lovers
Feel great …being in in public getting the attention..self care and health is important

 

Don’t think it different for me just like being wanted