Jodie Foster: Lesbian. Bi? Hypocrite? WTF?

Let me start this thread by stating that I admire Jodie Foster. Big Time. And I have been aware of her tremendous talent for close to 35 years. She makes acting seem so effortless. And even during the early years of her career, she exhibited a kind of strength and integrity that is rarely found in adults (well alone teen actors).

So what's up with all her defensive posturing? I mean, every time a reporter asks a question about her personal life, Jodie immediately insists that what she does in private -- has absolutely nothing to do with her acting career. In part, she is correct. But what about the fact that since she is such a respected public figure -- she is living proof that lesbians and gays are much more than about sex: That some actually make major contributions to the creative industry.

I mean, what is she so afraid of? There are many out lesbians. And there are many out gay men? Their careers continue to prosper (Ellen and Rupert Everett are only two examples). So why stay stuck in the closet? I can't understand why she remains so secretive? Jodie is somebody that other gay and lesbian folks can look up to -- proof that one's sexuality need not hold you back. So why not join the club, instead of insisting it has little value or importance? What are your thoughts on the matter? Is she merely being selfish? Or is she doing the smart thing?

--QP

 

She is technically correct. And the problem is if you're gay, a lot of times the press are more interested in that than any films/music you make. Your sexuality is only a small part of your life, but when you're gay, that can be blown out of all proportion by the media and the general public. If I was her, Id probably be annoyed if people seemed more interested in my private life just because I'm a lesbian, than my acting abilities. What she's doing isn't really right or wrong, but I can see why she's doing that, and I respect it.

When an aspect of your private life seems to be getting more attention than the work you want to be admired and respected for, then you'd probably want to downplay your private life. I know some heterosexuals in the entertainment industry probably don't like discussing their private affairs publicly, why should a gay person be any different? Anyways, she thanked her female lover in an awards ceremony, so its not like she's ashamed of it, or anything.

 

What you say is so true. I agree with you 99%. But why did it take her so long to openly admit she is lesbian/Bi? I mean, I'm not a famous sort. And I got a lot of flack for publishing openly queer poems during my twenties. But by the time I hit thirty: I said, to hell with all this dishonesty. If the publishing world insists I must change my pronouns (in order to get published), then they can go screw themselves. I'd rather not be published. And I actually stopped sending out my poems. I certainly never pretended to be straight -- or said my private life was nobody's business.

Hell, if you are a writer or actor -- you are opening yourself to the public. And if people are responding to you (fans), then I think you owe it to them to be honest about yourself. Even if it means less book sales or not having a Top 10 movie. I can't get over the fact that people still argue with me that Jodie Foster is straight. WTF? And she has been acting for more than 35 years? What part did her denial play in all of this? And why did it take her so long to come out? That's what I'm genuinely curious about. It just pains me because I have so much respect for her as an artist. Truman Capote once said that Jodie Foster would be perfect for the lead in Breakfast at Tiffany's (if Hollywood ever did a remake). I must say, I tend to agree with him. The woman is a genius.

--QP

 

BTW, I am not advocating "outing" every LGBT person in the world. I am merely questioning why anyone would choose a career that is heavily dependent on the public -- if they are more comfortable having a private life? There seems to be some sort of missing link (IMO)?

I am questioning psychological motives/reasons. Some I understand (homophobia is real). Some I do not (why pretend homosexuality is not an issue --AFTER you have become famous and respected)?

--QP

 

I dont really blame anyone for staying in the closet. You said she's been acting for 35 years. Im sure 35 years ago it was even harder to come out as gay than it is now. Homophobia is the main reason why people find it difficult to come out, and it can potentially harm your career, especially back then. You sound like a very strong person, some people are not so strong. And lots of people struggle with their homosexuality, because much of society seems so unaccepting of it. And Im sure 35 years ago it would have seemed more unaccepting than today. People who say Jodie is straight, are just stupid. Just because she doesnt go shouting it out from the rooftops at every opportunity, doesnt mean she's straight.

You may have never pretended to be straight, but lots of gay people have felt the need to do that. And Im sure decades ago even more gays than today felt they had no choice but to live a lie or be persecuted. Its like me, Ive always identified as female, even though I was brought up as male. I never ever pretended to be a male, but I know lots of people in that situation do try and fit the mould people try and force them into, because they think it's too difficult to be true to themselves. I think Jodie has been honest, just because she doesn't discuss her private life regularly, doesn't mean she's being dishonest. I think gay people in the general public would probably be happier if more gay stars were more open about their private lives. And it can also give inspiration, that just being gay shouldn't hold you back in your ambitions and dreams. The thing with a lot of todays stars. is they came out while they were already famous. You do have to wonder if they'd have achieved as much success, or recognition, if their homosexuality was known right from the start of their careers.

Elton John, Ellen, Jodie Foster, George Michael, Rob Halford, Ian Mckellan, all these people, and many more had been famous for many years before their true sexualities were disclosed. I think we are living in an age now where it might be a bit easier for a star to make it big with their homosexuality known from the outset, but I think there's still a long way to go yet unfortunately.

 

You are correct: There are many valid reasons for staying in the closet. In fact, just staying alive (e.g., Matthew Shepard) -- is more than enough reason. But I guess I'm questioning true gay/lesbian heroics? I mean, maybe it really is possible for someone to be enormously talented (like Jodie Foster), yet to be cautious and timid in real life? For example, Gertrude Stein was not shy about Alice? And Quentin Crisp and Truman Capote -- never tried to conceal their true natures? And this was long, long before Miss Foster was ever born.

Yet Quentin, Gertrude, and Mr. Capote -- all made a name for themselves. In fact, Truman Capote (thanks to IN COLD BLOOD) -- became one of the most famous writers of his generation. And we're talking more than forty years ago. So coming out of the closet can not be used as an excuse for instant failure.

If one has true talent (which Jodie Foster certainly has always had), then most people are likely to focus on that -- straight or queer. Otherwise, queer folks like Wilde, Stein, Capote, Tennessee Williams, etc. -- would be little more than a footnote in history. That's what puzzles me about Jodie Foster. It's almost like she was only half as brave as her film characters. And I would be a liar if I pretended not to be disappointed by that fact. Still, she remains one of my favorite GLBT folks. And I understand that the world can be a dangerous place. So please don't misunderstand me. I just have a great amount of admiration for those that are willing to be open and honest about themselves -- even if it means risking society's scorn. To me: This is truly heroic.

--QP

 

I haven't walked a mile in Jodie Foster's shoes, so I am awfully hesitant to say what she should do. When I think of Ellen DeGeneres, I tend to think of her sexual orientation before I think of her pleasant personality or her talent. Maybe that has something to do with the way her coming out was such a big issue in the media. I think one reason her career hasn't suffered is because she isn't playing romantic parts. If I saw her in a movie where she ends up with some guy, I'd probably start giggling so hard that somebody would slap me.

QueerPoet, the reason people argue with you about Jodie Foster being straight is because they see what they want to see. A few years ago I was in a restaurant with my sister, my sister's female lover, my male lover and my godson.

There was a group of people behind us, and I overheard part of their conversation. One woman in particular was very curious about us. At one point, she said, "I've got it figured out. The guy in the purple shirt [me] is obviously married to the woman in the white blouse [my sister]. The guy in the blue shirt [my lover] is his brother and the woman in the red blouse [my sister's lover] is sister. And the blond kid [my godson] is obviously the son of the married couple.

Wow. She really got it wrong. But that isn't the first situation like that I've ever encountered. I also think of Liberace and all the little old ladies who were convinced that he was perfectly heterosexual even though he was possibly the most flamboyant gay man who ever lived.

Maybe Jodie Foster doesn't want to have to talk about that aspect of her life in all of her interviews. She has acknowledged her female significant other, so I hesitate to think of her as being closety.

 

i admire jodie foster for refusing to speak about her sexuality..


unless i am trying to bang her i dont give a shit if she is a stamplicker

 

jodie foster is gay? wow

 

this is none of our business what she does in her private life, and whether she's bi, lesbian, straight, whatever. it doesn't concern us. she has every right for her privacy and she doesn't owe answers to anybody. if she wants to keep it secret it's her right to do so.

get on with your own lives and stop minding other people's.

 

I agree that no one, celebrity or obscure need to discuss their sexuality publicly unless they are so inclined. Now, being a celebrity, this goes more noticed because news & gossip wonks have no decorum about asking rude and intrusive questions THAT ARE NOT NORMALLY ALLOWED IN POLITE CONVERSATION.

So, I believe celebs have a right to their privacy and would like to see some kind of control of these hounding paparazi who cause grief and accidents trying to feed the lucrative obsessive curiosity of the public that has no other life.

I never even thought about Jodie Foster being gay, but now that you mention it her bearing sorta triggers the gaydar. (BTW - what about George Clooney? He's just too damn good looking to be str8) Yeah, I have the same shallow curiosity, but I won't go out of my way to find out if someone is gay (only if I might have a chance with Clooney ).

Now, I am not a celebrity but I have been pretty out on many parts of my personal life, whether involving nudism, interracial marriage or gay and bi issues. In the '80s and '90s I wrote a lot of articles on these very subjects that were published in magazines and newspapers and now are referenced online (Yahoo Search Rob Boyte). But that is me, more politically active on these issues. Not everyone wants to be so open with their personal life and I respect their right to do that.

 

in the big picture of things.. my opinion is that an actor has no obligation to share anything personal with the public if that's their choice. their career is to entertain and play roles and etc.. why that means they should be representatives of their demographics or get up on a soapbox or etc etc is beyond me.. they deserve privacy just like any other member of the public.

as far as the small pic, in this case jodie foster.. i don't know anything about her or have heard any quotes or interviews so i don't really want to comment on it

 

Can't she just be who she wants?

 

This is true. But the whole "coming out" process was long and misleading. I can remember going to a gay bar with a lesbian friend back in the late 1980s, and Jodie was being interviewed on television. She had recently been photographed at several events with a well known male actor. So she was asked if the dude was a romantic prospect. Her response was that he was just a friend, and that she was not seeing anybody special. In fact, she was so busy with work, that the last thing on her mind was a serious relationship.

Several lesbians at the bar rolled their eyes (including my friend). I asked my friend about this, and she told me that it was common knowledge (in the lesbian community) that Jodie had a female partner. It would be several years before she made any sort of public statement about this. So she was willing to talk about her private life -- as long as it kept the myth alive that she was straight and single. Why pretend to be something you are not? That can't be a healthy way to live.

--QP

 

I sensed Jodie was gay after seeing only two or three of her movies. And this was while she was still a teen. As the years went by, I thought it was odd that she was photographed with attractive men, but always claimed to be too busy to get involved with anyone. Her work came first. I actually began to think my own gaydar had failed me. Big time.

But once I started meeting up with other gay folks -- everyone was telling me that Jodie Foster was a lesbian. And she did not want the public to know. She finally came out very late in her career. Anyway, I have been out of the closet since the age of 23. I told my family. I published poems about gay subjects. I joined queer groups. And if anybody asked me how come I seemed to prefer the company of men -- I told them it was because I was gay. I felt no guilt or shame. And if I lost a friend or two, then they were never a friend to begin with.

Also, I lost some opportunities to get my poems published, but I thought it was more important to be honest to myself and others, instead of living a lie. My main reason for this was because I remembered what it was like to be a 14 y/o queer, and not having any gay role models to emulate or look up to. It's a very isolating experience. Now we have plenty of GLBT folks to admire and look up to. But it's all still fairly recent. And it's only because of those first few queer celebrities -- willing to go out on a limb for the rest of us. I both appreciate and admire that. And it will make things much easier for young folks coming out in the future. So in that sense, it can be perceived as a political act.

--QP

 

do you assume that only gay people can be role models for other gay people? when i grew up my heroes were (and are to this day) Napoleon Bonaparte and Bruce Springsteen among some others. They're straight. i didn't need my heroes to be gay. such a thought never occurred to me. what matters is what the person does with his life, who he is. sexuality has nothing to do with it. a gay youth can look up to Bruce Springsteen as much as Ian McKellan. their sexuality is completely irrelevant in this aspect.

 

what matters is what the person does with his life, who he is. sexuality has nothing to do with it. a gay youth can look up to Bruce Springsteen as much as Ian McKellan. their sexuality is completely irrelevant in this aspect.--meridianwest

Sorry, but I strongly disagree. When I was growing up -- Truman Capote and Lance Loud (from An American Family) were the only other gay folks I saw/heard anything about. And they both were laughed at and ridiculed. Since I was an effeminate youth myself, this only served to make me feel even more freakish and apart. In fact, both my straight brothers warned me that I better watch my step, or I'd wind up like Capote and Lance Loud. I didn't know what the hell they were talking about.

If there had been other openly gay folks (for example, I was a big Elton John fan, but he was still in the closet), then I might have felt like less of a freak. My younger brother also was heavily into Elton John's music, and I could have pointed out to him that Elton was gay. So being gay is obviously not a terrible thing. But there were very few visible gay folks during my youth.

BTW, I also listened to Springsteen's music. So it's not like I'm saying gay people can only have gay heroes. All I'm saying is it's nice to know that gay folks can become successful -- and are not just freaks to be laughed at. And forty years ago, queers were often treated like a joke. Both on television and in real life. Things have changed considerably. And a lot of this is due to so many folks (famous and obscure) coming out of the closet.

--QP

 

yes, things have already changed. so why are we still talking about ancient history? you're starting to sound like an embittered old man.

gay youth have just as many possibilities to become successful as straight do. we've established that. but whether one becomes successful or not depends on his personal traits; intelligence, talent, willpower, among others. those traits have got nothing to do with their bearer's sexuality. if you're a young gay guy wanting to become a musician, then you'll likely have some musicians you look up to. and the reason why you admire some musicians more than others -- as our hypothetical gay youth -- is because of the kind of music they make, not whether or not they swing your way.

we're all human beings here. straight, gay -- the human element remains the same. thus the lack of necessity for a role model to be of the same sexuality as yourself. unless, of course, a guy's sexuality is of paramount importance when forming an opinion about him, which is so for people who usually have some unresolved issues with sexuality themselves.

 

I thank you for the insult. You are very kind. But just remember this: If everyone had lived as you would like them to (in a very dark closet), queer folks would still be treated as little better than criminals. It is only because of people like Harvey Milk, Quentin Crisp, Elton John, Ellen, etc., -- that the GLBT community eventually began to be treated with dignity, instead of scorn. If you choose to believe their contributions are "ancient history," I truly pity you. I have nothing but respect for my elders.

--QP

 

I can see the QP's point of view here. And I also agree with the MW that the playing field has been pretty much levelled for many professions and careers.

We should not really forget that many people grew up (or are still growing up) with the societally imposed notion that there is something wrong with being gay. Many of these guys are scared shitless, and some of them tend to think that they are inferior to the str8 males in every way. I have never felt that way but I still very clearly remember how thrilled I was when I discovered, (at the age of 14), that one of my Dad's business associates who was a very, very successful man, was actually gay.

If he made it big, why would not I do the same?

So, yeah, positive gay role models are very much needed to help gay youth overcome their fears, problems with the low self-esteem, and continously reassure all of us that gay guys can be, (and are) as successful as everyone else.

All of this however, does not go on to say that anyone should be compelled to become a (gay) role model against his or her will. People are successful because of the unique talent they possess and the necessary amount of work they invested in promoting their talents, AND not really because they are str8, bi or gay. If JF or anyone else chooses to keep their sexuality to themselves for whatever their reason(s) may be, this ought to be unconditionally respected, too. She did not get big because she was gay. She owes gay folks per se nothing...

KD