Jealousy to Arousal - with wife

Hi everyone! New here and this is my first post. I am 30 year old male who is very happily married to a lovely 28 year old woman.

I met my current wife when she was 21 and she had told me that she had been with a lot of different guys. I come from a very conservative Middle Eastern background so this used to make me feel jealous and insecure, despite the fact that our sex life has always been amazing. She comes from a very liberal white household so sex has always been positively talked about. I realized that this was completely my problem and not hers so I decided to work on it.

Fast forward a few years and I realize how lucky and enjoyable it is to have such a sexually experienced wife! We have sex almost daily and her having been with other guys makes me for some amazing dirty talk and skills haha

I’m not sure if many men feel like this but it’s amazing once you not only embrace but also encourage your wife or gf’s promiscuous side

 

Yes, I totally understand. I came to realize this later in life

 

That’s wonderful to hear! We are lucky men indeed

 

The real test comes, when you can watch her with another man. A feeling like no other.

 

My wife and I practice “Compersion”. It is reciprocal and based on ability to allow your spouse to enjoy their individual sex life with others. It allows one to to experience a more fulfilling sex life without the jealousy aspect. Only joy for each other.

 

Twenty years ago, I set up something with a friend of ours. I left the room and watched through a door with a video camera. Unfortunately, part way through, she panicked and it never developed into a full-scale episode, but it was heart-pounding (as evidenced by the camera movement) to watch the kissy-kissy, then undressing, then with her naked and him bent over her sucking her breasts (her favorite) and stroking her body. She told me later she 'was afraid you'd catch us'. I hadn't let her know it was ok. Rats.

 

I was always jealous with my first live in GF, and she was even more so with me. My now ex wife I didn't feel jealousy, even though she had a frequent lover. Current wife I never felt jealousy.....until our first MFM. So totally turned on during our for play , but when he started fucking her......and how much she enjoyed that first orgasm with him.....jealousy hit me. When it was my turn I felt better, and we kept going. When I came in her and he just kept fucking her, jealous and insecure in a big way.

 

Blow it off, man. Think of it as, 'that's the way I used to do her, now I get to watch'.

It's not about a particular guy, it's about the fact that some women, once in full sexual maturity, are like a bucket with a slow leak that can't ever be filled. No matter how often or to what degree one fills it, the level drops. My ex, years ago was like that. God, that woman could FLIRT, to the point of sitting on laps, laughing and letting hands roam. It took awhile, but it 'broke' me of that jealousy BS. If they want to be with you, they will.

 

I guess I was among the lucky ones.....never experienced a pang of jealousy when seeing my wife feel the thrill of another mans cock for the first time in years .

Only excitement and enjoyment for her .

 

In honesty, I have seen a couple of guys with big dicks, get jealous seeing their women enjoying another guy please her more than they can. A real shock to their ego. Most guys with average size, enjoy their women enjoying themself.

 

We have found a twinge of jealousy adds a bit of spice, especially in the build up. It's always is a sort of balance, jealousy mixed with an intense desire to see her with th other guy. That balance is part of the thrill.

 

An intense desire to see her excited and satisfied by another guy . . . .

 

I would absolutely love to be with two men at the same time and have my man give me that freedom and encourage it and just let me enjoy being a woman.

 

Yes, I understand. I was really jealous when my future wife was dating other men in college. After we married and she was totally mine, I found myself getting really turned on when she told me about having sex with those guys in college. I still enjoy it after many years.

 

Knowing a few guys who consider them self the world's greatest lover. Have a hard time dealing with it. I was happy my girlfriend, opened up to me and told me she wanted to experience other men. But felt strange first time seeing her with another man.

 

"...But felt strange first time seeing her with another man...."

After 12 yrs of marriage I set up a thing with a friend of mine with my wife. Oops, forgot to tell her it would be ok, so it didn't go all the way to penetration. Still, it was interesting to see, from another room, them kissing deeply, then him undressing her, stroking her naked, then bent over her sucking her nipples, while her hand stroked his back. But when he started rubbing her pussy, she got scared they "might get caught" and called it off. Rats.

As was said, it felt strange, but interesting. I probably could have handled it if he'd gotten her legs up and slipped into her. Our activity had dropped off a lot, so it was good to see her turned on and enjoying a man again. That was 21 yrs ago and am considering it again. Have brought it up and her responses have not been negative, just, "Well, we'll see."

 

The "Well we'll see " is a good start though .

 

As has been said.....that is the best compliment that can be paid to your wife !

 

True, Pyth and MM, in many respects. One can be the best husband, helping w/housework, kids, and all the other societally expected things, and even the physical/bedtime things when they need, while denying oneself. But there's a deeper understanding of the particular females never-spoken-of urges that can be sensed and addressed by outside-the-established methods. Re: mine above.

 

Maybe you should have told her it was ok. In my case I was not jealous, I had no right to be since I was playing around. But yes I could tell she was enjoying it. I did wonder if I would be able to satisfy her again.
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