Hi all, My girlfriend and i had been together 6 months and were very much in love but then she broke up with me 3 days ago, for a few reasons... telling her family, and the other is she will not forget and leave my past behind us. I had a holiday booked and paid for with my ex and a few friends and i still went on this holiday but came home a week early just didnt feel right being there, but now my girlfriend says she cant forget this and it hurt her my gf works with my ex aswell so she is constantly reminded of her and r rship, she keeps bringing her up alot, and it was making us argue alot! Iv told her this girl did not mean anything and she is my world bcoz she is...How can i help my gf to forget wat ive done and my past? How can i get my girl back, she is my life and before all this started controlling her mind and making her insecure and jealous we were perfect and so happy? please help me!
Sorry to hear of this problem Claisha. It sounds like you have gone pretty head over heels with this other girl. Part of the problem, it seems to me, is that your ex and gf work together. That is never a good thing! Good luck on your situation, sorry I have no advice...
Sorry about ur situation. In my relationship we had problems at first and I mean really BIG problems. But tbh it just sounds like building the trust in the relationship E.g ur gf seems like she doesn't trust u 100% because of the holiday and I know working with ur ex doesn't help, but all u need to do is gain her trust and hopefully things will work out.
I just think that you need to have a serious conversation with her saying that you want to be with her and that you are a faithful person(if you are?). Just be honest with her and explain. I think that your ex is a major problem in this when at work,she may be saying some things about you to make her mad etc. So maybe you need to talk to your ex about that And I believe that you should never had went to that trip, how you feel if it was the other way around, I know you would of been hurt also. So I don't' blame her getting mad. But since you came back one week early she should take that into consideration.
Even going on the vacation planned w/ the ex and friends probably made your current gf very insecure. She had to trust you to be alone at least at times with your ex, whom she apparently knows from work. Is it possible your ex is still into you? Even at all? Or could she be putting ideas in your gfs head?
Dear Claisha, I am sorry to read that you are having issues such as this with a girl that you are evidently very much in love with. I will try to give you some advice as best as I can though what others have already commented with i.e. your girlfriend and the ex-girlfriend being colleagues at work, makes it pretty difficult to find some strong ground to base it from. The thing is, your girlfriend feels insecure about the whole issue of you going on the trip, and furthermore, she will be unable to forget it easily if at all because she works in the same place as your ex-girlfriend. My opinion is that despite the fact it was all prebooked, it may not have been a very good idea to continue with the trip alongside your ex-girlfriend, especially as your current girlfriend was not invited, and furthermore, when left alone, would have felt insecure knowing that you are away with someone you used to be romantically close to. I can see it from her point of view. I think that as far as she is concerned, it felt like disloyalty to her. I am not pointing fingers or trying to stir up a dust cloud, I am merely trying to be as open and neutral-standing as possible. Here is my advice to you. You and her need to talk and on a comfortable level. What I mean by this is take her away from any areas that she may associate with the problem e.g. workplace, a particular bar. Instead choose a cafe that neither of you have ever been to, somewhere where the place is like a 'blank canvas' and no feelings hang in the atmosphere. Make it a date if you wish. Then try and console her about the whole issue, tell her exactly how you feel and how this whole situation is making you feel. I'd suggest firmly highlighting that you came back from the trip early because you didn't want to be away from her, and also because you realized it was wrong not to be with her. If you make it as clear to her as possible that you really love her, that you know you made a mistake, then you may be able to resolve things. The whole 'telling the family' situation should not be thought of as a 'here and now' scenario. Indeed it can be done gradually and with thought and careful planning her family will be able to have the time to come to terms with it. This is the last thing that either of you should be worrying about because at the end of the day you are who you are, and whether or not everyone accepts you both, you two are together, and can support one another. It's always scary contemplating it and I know how she must be feeling but she mustn't worry herself with every minor detail of it. She should just focus on you two and then, once you two are strong you can support each other through that process. I really hope this helps in some way. Good luck to you.
