go way far out of your way to make your unhappy partner happy or to enjoy them and watch as they figure things out and go with the flow whatever the future may bring?
I disagree with the above at this point in my life. Ex wife was the type who expected me to make her happy. It gets worse. She didn’t listen to a good friend with a level head and it took her a good while after I left her to figure that one out. If a person expects you to look after their happiness, fuck them is what I say, it’s not worth it. To back up my comments, another friend had the same issue with a girlfriend. Those are the kind of people who don’t get it until later it seems. So, do you want to take a chance, invest and live with that and see how long it takes to change or not?
I meant when making someone happy becomes an obligation. Like "What have you done for me lately" type stuff.
Like manipulative shit, well some is OK, but most of it just says they only care about themselves, time to skidaddle.
I suppose it depends in what context it is taken. If people do it because they want to within a healthy relationship, for sure it is a pleasure to make your partner happy. But with someone who takes it for granted or expects it to be your job, hell no. That was what I had at the time My fwb was something else. We gave and gave to each other but it was mostly sexual. Some dates and little things like meals
There is no duty to it. You have to want to. Not by force but by desire. Desire to see the one you are attracted to succeed. But there are limits on what you can do for your partner. The adage of leading the horse to water but not being able to make him drink applies here. Go as far as you can to make them happy then sit back and watch as they try to figure things out. Maybe they will, maybe they won't. The key to it is not letting yourself be swallowed up into that hole your partner is creating. If your partner told you to jump into the abyss they created, would you? There's the dividing line. Step over it and you have become just as unhappy as your partner when there is no need for that. So if you have led them to happiness and they refuse to accept that they can be happy, you have done all you can do and know it's time to let go. Blaze your own trail in life with vim, vigor, and gusto. Setting this example may have your partner want to join you. If so gather them up and head on towards happy times and adventures. If not go your own course and have a ball doing it.
