Is any one else this blank?

Discussion in 'Men's Issues' started by Jedi, Aug 29, 2005.

  1. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    Now, I don't mean to say that I am not attracted to women but at my college- it started again this semester... there are plenty of scenarios where 'us' guys look at women - although they do, somehow I am not. Now I am not sure why. I am not gay,thats for sure because I am not attracted to men, but it is bothersome when someone says "oh look at that chick" and when I look, I don't feel a thing. I feel blank, why? when I say I don't feel a thing, there is this surprise that I am some how lying. At work , a coworker asked me if I have a girlfriend, I said "no", then all of a sudden she started to ask me if I have a boyfriend and then I said "no". What the hell is that? if I don't have a girlfriend I am some how gay? I told her I am not gay and she said she doesn't believe me. what the hell. How do gays act? do they act a certain way? I dont' know .
    What the hell is wrong with me, why am i not feeling anything.

    or is it that no guy really feels anything when he sees a girl but everyone just acts that way out of peer pressure? huh?

    Actually my boss also started thinking I was gay for some reason - I had to push some cart full of stuff down the aisle .. it turns out that he was in the way and the cart rubbed off of his side. I didn't think anything of it, yet there you go!- All the factors add up in his twisted mind some how and I am considered gay. I don't get it, I just dont' get it.
     
  2. tigerlily

    tigerlily proud mama

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    well... i guess stereotypically guys are supposed to be more visual, but i think that's bullshit. and i'm the same way, btw (though a girl) and when anybody points out anybody good looking (which is mostly girls pointing out "hot guys") i never feel anything... i've never been one to "check out" ppl... i don't really notice looks until somebody's talking to me, and most importantly, smiling. although, i have found many ppl attractive in my lifetime, i don't see it until i get to know them somewhat... even if superficially
     
  3. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    well thanks, but some how did anyone cal you a lesbian for not noticing or is it that you just act as if you notice it.
     
  4. tigerlily

    tigerlily proud mama

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    lol nobody called me a lesbian... i'd just say oh yeah, they look nice, or, nah, they're not my type or whatever... i can still comment on how a person looks without "feeling" anything... know what i mean? but it's not something i notice on my own.

    are you attracted to guys? sometimes ppl jump to conclusions.. or try to push buttons. it could have been either. are you somewhat flamboyant or effeminate? *shrug* i have no idea why ppl would think you might be gay.
     
  5. tigerlily

    tigerlily proud mama

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    although i must say... women are more noticable to me... so maybe i am a lesbian :) lol but the "hot ones" are usually putting themselves on display, which is why they're considered hot right? .. or something like that
     
  6. tommyboy487

    tommyboy487 Member

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    Why should it be a bad thing...?
    Consider yourself one of the few blessed people in the world who's minds dont automatically resort to prejudism.
     
  7. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    actually i wear all colors- red, blue, green, yellow etc. I am not sure if I am considered flamboyant. and yes you can say that I am very friendly with people - sort of like a "people person" but I am not effeminate! just because you try to make friends with everyone does not make you weak or feminine in some way!


    nevermind then.
     
  8. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    easy to think, hard to do with all the stupid idiotic thoughts that I am having because of this. I don't know why I am acting gay , how does a gay guy act?
     
  9. tigerlily

    tigerlily proud mama

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    lol sorry i couldn't be of more help. none of that makes you weak or even feminine, you're right... i just wouldn't worry about it. i don't think there's anything wrong with you, but if you feel pressured, comment on the person talking about the visual and not your physical feelings
     
  10. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    yea you are right, fuck this - I think I am thinking too much of this already.
     
  11. tommyboy487

    tommyboy487 Member

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    your effeminite.. i cant tell and i dont even know you:)
    ... manly guys dont use exclamation marks!! :p
     
  12. Green

    Green Iconoclastic

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    Now, I don't mean to say that I am not attracted to women but at my college- it started again this semester... there are plenty of scenarios where 'us' guys look at women - although they do, somehow I am not. Now I am not sure why. I am not gay,thats for sure because I am not attracted to men, but it is bothersome when someone says "oh look at that chick" and when I look, I don't feel a thing. I feel blank, why? when I say I don't feel a thing, there is this surprise that I am some how lying. - Thats because your not horny. If you go without masturbating you'll become horny.


    At work , a coworker asked me if I have a girlfriend, I said "no", then all of a sudden she started to ask me if I have a boyfriend and then I said "no". What the hell is that? if I don't have a girlfriend I am some how gay? I told her I am not gay and she said she doesn't believe me. what the hell. How do gays act? do they act a certain way? I dont' know .
    What the hell is wrong with me, why am i not feeling anything.- Nothings wrong with you. Your co worker is dumb. If somebody says they aren't gay then they aren't (unless theres some reason for them lieing, but anyway).

    or is it that no guy really feels anything when he sees a girl but everyone just acts that way out of peer pressure? huh?- No, some guys are just horny and share it with their friends.

    Actually my boss also started thinking I was gay for some reason - I had to push some cart full of stuff down the aisle .. it turns out that he was in the way and the cart rubbed off of his side. I didn't think anything of it, yet there you go!- All the factors add up in his twisted mind some how and I am considered gay. I don't get it, I just dont' get it.- Its not like you slapped his ass. Don't worry about people thinking your gay.
     
  13. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    Congratulations my friend, you just got exclamation cooties from me.
     
  14. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    "No, some guys are just horny and share it with their friends."

    Yep thats true, its too bad that we can't keep things to ourselves.
     
  15. chegzy

    chegzy Member

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    are you not just more attracted to a persons personality than their appearance?
    That would explain why you have no feelings when someone walks past because you done know their personality??
     
  16. Jedi

    Jedi Self Banned

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    damn lucky guess... yea thats true
     
  17. mynameiskc

    mynameiskc way to go noogs!

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    unless you're looking at the guys and thinking to yourself "hell YEAH, baby!" i don't think you're gay.
     
  18. dawn_sky

    dawn_sky Senior Member

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    My boyfriend dealt with a lot of that crap -- having to put up a false front or have everyone call him gay -- around the people he went to high school with (including several years after graduation, when he would hang out with them while in town to visit his mom). He's not the type to hoot and holler at girls, he hates strip clubs, he has pretty much never come on to a girl. He is most certainly not gay.

    I can't say how he feels inside when he sees a "hot" girl (well, now he better not feel anything, dammit! ;)). But, seriously, he's never been one to get all worked up over random women. He has never had, nor considered having, a one-night-stand -- not because the option never presented itself, but because he has no interest in having sex with someone he doesn't like and respect as a person.

    I don't know if this helps. But I don't think you're that unusual. I think the difference lies in how much you respect women as people versus how much you objectify women as sex objects. And, based on the men I've known, a LOT of those comments stem from the guy's own insecurities, needing to put on a show, rather than any reaction he would have if he didn't have an audience.
     
  19. Green

    Green Iconoclastic

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    I usually don't respect people, but when I see a hot girl I want to be respectful of her, but then I get a bit of her personality, and I don't care any more. I tend to enjoy using girls whos personalitys I like but aren't so attractive in sex fantasys than girls whos personalitys I hate and are very attractive. Its just a respect thing.

    When you say nothing you have nothing, but you don't have anything bad. When you say something you immediately go onto judging scale in my head, and if what you said made me really not want to respect you, I wont respond.

    Thats rare though.

    I interperet people on how they act, and I'm not very judgemental. You wont hear me say "Oh, shes a bitch" or whatever about somebody.

    If I have a bunch of respect for somebody and they do something I don't like to me I feel awful.

    If I have no respect for somebody and they do something I don't like to me I don't care.
     
  20. white ginger

    white ginger Senior Member

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    Your boss thinks you are gay because
    1. You think so much about it when the idea is presented
    2. you get tense and upset/irritated with the idea of being gay

    I'm not saying you are gay or you're not... but really it doesn't matter unless someone's asking you out..
     

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