Installing a wife

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by Just_a_woman, Apr 5, 2014.

  1. Just_a_woman

    Just_a_woman Member

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    Copied from the Internet to amuse you.
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    Dear tech support,

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6
    I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

    Thanks,
    Troubled User.. (KEEP READING)

    _____________________________________
    REPLY:
    Dear Troubled User:

    This is a very common problem that men complain about.

    Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

    You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

    The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

    However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

    Known incompatabilities exist with Woman Friend depending on version and on GUI/Look and feel of the Woman Friend application. You may have to uninstall Woman Friend to be compatable with Wife 1.0.

    WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is no t supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
    _____________________________________________
    End of copy and paste

    There's the Husband 1.0 on another thread.
     
  2. KingWilly

    KingWilly Member

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    lol, this is hilarious! Good post
     
  3. TheGhost

    TheGhost Auuhhhhmm ...

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    :rofl: Loooool
     
  4. lunarverse

    lunarverse The Living End

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    Haha!

    Super awesome!
     

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