She was sitting on the corner, hiding from the world. those who walked by, they looked at her with sad eyes. they saw she had no home, saw she was all alone. there were never anyone there, to see her tears no one to feel her fears no one to say her name Impilo, Life. a hand, help, a girl Impilo... (Impilo, means life in a south-African language, can anyone help me find out what the language is called??) I hope you all like it, i wrote it when we had something called OD at school. we collected money to people in africa..
I liked the first stanza most, as it had a little more specifics that I could grab onto. You also have a really good feel for flow, you’re line breaks occur in all the right places. Also, impilo means life in the zulu language, according to google, at least
