Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by fluttersteke, Jan 24, 2011.
Having and orgasm usually help alot before penetration, relaxed muscles and lubed to the max.
I also have this problem. I've just started seeing a new guy and when we have sex it is incredibly painful. I am quite tight and he is quite large.. I feel so bad because he's great at foreplay and is always so concerned when he sees me grimace in pain. We have tried using alot of lube and also tried alot of foreplay before hand, but its still very very painful for me.. Any suggestions would be a great help!
Haha, guys that think girls can't be too tight are lacking much experience. I laughed at a couple posts here. I had a couple girlfriends who were too tight. One when I was young. She literally was too small to so we used oil, and then we didn't feel anything. With her it was too difficult and we split. She was Mexican. With the other, we spent a number of years together and as we grew older this problem disappeared because we grew together. She was Asian.
They make better lubes than when I was young. Try the intense arousal stuff. I hear it's pretty good.
Condoms - use lubricated.
it could also be a medical condition. i forget whats its called but it has to do with painful sex. but then again you seem to be more in the complaint that you Hulk his condom right off with you vag muscles. i had this problem with a few of my ex's....lots and lots of foreplay. also if they go in and just let it sit there. dont thrust or try. just relax and let your vaginal muscles loosen and sort of mold to his size, it can help. also may i suggest using Trojan Ecstacy condoms. i swear by them. best ever. also are you clenching down more during an orgasm or just in general? i tend to squeeze super hard during a climax. which is almost impossible to stop lol
Sorry for the long post, i don't know how i landed in this thead but i'll try to help!
I'm a man, and my problem has nothing to do with yours (i've had several contractures in my back, my shoulder and my neck, i even had some knee injuries while doing sport) All my problems were solved after reeducating myself in the way i move, i sit, i stand up and the way i live and i achieved all of this after learning to relax....and learning how to stretch out my muscles and voluntarily learnt to relax those muscles when concentrating on them. My problems were related to stress from working too much and raising my small kids while my wife had a depression...
So, back to your problem, take pilates or yoga, and relax! Do some stretching at home! Try another style of living, Please believe that you can improve your own life!
And for your specific problem, learn to relax your muscles! try it while masturbating to master the technique! try to use bigger dildos than your boyfriend's dick, be sure to be fully aroused and willing to try! Relax, enter the tip, press it and push it as hard as you can for some seconds, and then relax your muscles, feel the stretch feeling, learn to associate it with pleasure not with pain, pain will always make you tighter! introduce a bigger portion, and repeat it...until you can learn how to relax your muscles and enjoy the feeling. And then be sure your boyfriend is also relaxed to achieve with him all what have your learnt!
Kegel exercises will help you how to control your muscles and how to relax them1
Also consider anal sex.... i was once with a girl that was in pain always when i fucked in the vagina, but it loved it in the ass. Try it yourself while masturbating, use one finger to circle and press it with lots of lube... and if you like it, use the same technique i wrote above, but be patient and be sure to be very aroused... All the girls i've been have enjoyed to several degrees, some of them have taken me fully, but all of them have cummed hard with a finger in each hole! Always after nice foreplay and guided by intuition, never really talking about it beforehand!
If you take a look into a thread call anal only, you will see that some girls in this forum had pain in their vagina everytime they had sex and swithched to anal after checking that it was not painful for them and they enjoyed more than the other way!
Why i write down these techniques? because i've learned them by myself, i love anal play, and i can take 7"girth dildos if i relax and adapt to it gradually! My wife has used that 7" dildo on me and it's even better but she has need to learn to be patient..... what works for the goose should work for the gander and viceversa!
I think it could be a lubrication problem. At the beginning, there is friction between your vagina and the condom and his penis and the condom. When he climaxes, there is less friction between his penis and the condom, because of his sperm, but there is still a lot of friction between your vagina walls and the condom.
If you use a lot of lube, the condom will glide in and out of your vagina, instead of being gripped by your vagina walls.
He also should use smaller condoms.
Another thing that could help is foreplay. Lots of foreplay would help you relax your vagina before intercourse.
I still have this problem with anal: if there is no foreplay, like when I do it with my husband, my anus muscles aren't relaxed and it is complicated and painful. With men who give me lots of stimulation, mainly by playing with my clit before anal, my anus is relaxed and I have anal without any pain at all. They can just come in. My husband struggles for several minutes till he can get inside me.
My wife can get very very loose when soaking and that's when I slip out of condom. I definitely think regular condoms are not for average girth. Regular condoms are 6.4" girth plus where as according to statistics the average girth is 4.6". Im 5.6" and I've learnt to hold it around base of cock when pulling out or even when fucking.
OP 2011 Wonder if she has same problem today? If soo she sounds like a keeper.
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