I'm so lonely...

I didn't know where else to post this, so I'll just dump my mindgunk here.

To all who could give a fuck:
I'm so fucking lonely...
I don't have any close friends living nearby. (A couple of guys who are kind of like friends, but no "real" friends.)
No girlfriend.
No nothing.

My whole life I've been more or less lonely. It's not that I can't make friends, it is just that it seems like every time I manage to get a close friend, they have to move for some or other reason.
Having a far above average level of intelligence, I can't really relate to most people. I get along fine with most everybody, regardless of age. I can easily strike up a conversation with someone who is 60 years old, and equally easy with someone who is 6 years old. The problem is, finding people who I can truly relate to. I find it hard to find someone who I can tell my thoughts on something, with them actually understanding what I'm talking about. The thing is though, when I do find someone who I can really talk to, we seem to instantly become great friends. I have a few of these friends, there is just one massive problem. Not one of them live nearby. It seems like every time I make a great friend, they move away.

To make matters worse, my dog, whom I loved dearly, died last year. This dog was with me through half of my life. (I'm 18 now, and had the dog for more than 9 years.) If it wasn't for my dog, I wouldn't have made it through a few periods in my life. I still occasionally see her in my dreams.

On top of this, I have never succeeded in getting a girlfriend. Admittedly I haven't put much effort at all into doing so, but the right girl just hasn't shown her face to me. I know this is something I cannot force anyway. I cannot ask a girl who I like out on a date without meeting said girl...

Sometimes I just wish I had someone I could talk to and share my deepest feelings, or someone I can hold when I feel insignificant in the world. I long for human contact with such ire that I feel like I am going to burst. Most of the time my mind is occupied and I don't notice these feelings deep inside of me. I have learned to deal with these feelings, pushing them to the back of my mind so that I can focus on the task at hand, and not fall back into the depression that consumed me earlier in life, but I cannot remain invulnerable. I just want love. I just want to be appreciated. I just want someone who accepts me as I am. I do not think that is to much to ask for.

I have been waiting for someone to come into my life and love me for a long long time.

I am lonely.
I am sad.
I want love.
I want to be held.
I want to feel the warmth of another person close to me.
I feel like I'm missing someone whom I am yet to meet...

 

I understand how you feel. Keep hanging on, that person will come to you. If you feel like you want to meet some new people, I suggest you just put yourself out there. Take a risk.

I don't understand what you mean by this.

 

this is becoming the new RT theme.

 

The hipforums always cures any sort of lonely I'm feelings.

About 90% of my social interactions are online. I'm fine with this, I'm not lonely.

The internet is a wonderful place to meet people and chat.

 

What I mean is, since I don't get the opportunity to get out much, I don't meet girls. If you don't meet girls, how can you possibly ask one out to a date?
And when I do get out, it seems like every guy in the entire town had the same idea as I had, on the same night. I swear I get to a place and find 6 guys for every girl... Maybe my town just has a very weird gender demographic. I don't know...

I do homeschooling (I'm in my final year, so moving back to a public school isn't an option, and it never really was one either. LOOONG story...)

 

The internet is far to impersonal to me. I need something closer.

 

I met the most important person in my life on the internet, on the hipforums actually...

now we've been together two years

 

dude your awesome..keep on keeping on..thats all i can really say about that

 

I feel the same way. People are put off by my raw sexual energy and my insatiable lust so I don't have many friends or people to just talk to about what's been inside me

 

You’re right it’s becoming the IN THING to do

If they wish to express themselves there’s always True Confessions or the Whiner thread



hotwater

 

Yeah I'm pretty much in the same boat at you OP. My girlfriend works from 10am to 10pm and I have no friends, it's mostly my fault because most people annoy me. I can't stand superficial people who only care about themselves and I'm fed up with being screwed over by "friends". I've tried to have new friends several times but they never seem to be at my level if you know what I mean. They either make me feel like a freak or a complete idiot.

 

Sounds like you had some real good friends, unfortunately they moved away. This happens to everyone. Happened to me and I now realize how good they were and how rare that is. Be happy you've still got contact.

If ALL you do is wallow in this, you're not going to attract much, and it's not going to be any fun.

Well perhaps maybe you should shut off this ego-induced thought of yours first. Might make a better first impression this way.

So can anyone else desperate for conversation - this does NOT make you smart. Trust, I'd almost write the same thing 5+ years ago.

Most COMMON relationships are NOT like this. I suggest stop dumping your whole philosophy on people, and work on finding the similarities first instead. Other people take more time to warm up, but you'd be surprised of their loyalty once you put the time in.

I am similar. I am pretty open. Can connect well with others if they are fairly open too.

Sorry about your doggie. On the brighter.. side, despite your great depression, you're only 18. It may feel like your whole life at that young age though..

Shit is HARD work - especially if you want a good one.

If you're holding out "for the right girl," on top of not putting forth effort upon your own admission, then you're literally running in oppossite directions. You're being lazy and raising your standards higher at the same time.

*It'll get more positive here 'cuz this is where I felt my experience can relate...

Everyone has their own cerebral life, their own wants, needs, their own ENTIRE life inside their head. For you to want or expect everyone you meet to take yours in with arms wide open IS too much. I'm learning this as I grow older, but you have to be your own company when it comes to that stuff.

You should not ask someone else, especially strangers to burden your very own human existence.

Everyone is capable of feeling all these things. You gotta learn to suck it up and carve your own way of living. Also, I'll credit ya if you're smart, stop thinking too much. It rarely ever helps.

I don't know, life's tough, but I can tell you the sooner you deal with your own problems on your own, and just meet others within MUTUAL comfort zones, the better relationships you will START to build.

You can't expect everyone you meet to be Jesus, ready to caress and pamper your human-conscious wounds.

Peaceness. :daisy:

 

This is the random thoughts thread, people can say whatever they want here. Why do people bitch about which thread goes where even in here? Just ignore it then.

 

I'm exactly the same way. I'm in a long distance relationship so I'm alone at home most of the time and my friends are all flakes. Too bad you're in central Fl, we could have been buddies (I'm near Miami). I'm not exactly antisocial, but most people aren't like me. I'm ridiculous sometimes, but I can balance that with being intelligent instead of being just stupid or just too serious.

 

I used to live in Miami about 6 months ago, but it was freaking crazy so I moved back home. That sucks cuz you seem like a really chill person. Feel free to PM me and chat anytime I'm always online.

 

Hotwater

 

Will do

 

1) who was bitching?

2) don't people notice the irony of making a post whining about people making posts whining about other people's posts?

 

I think I'm going to have a baby so I'm not so alone I will name it shue shue boo boo suger

 

I'll be your friend bro