Im a loser.....I think

Ok, here we go. Trying to put an old head on young shoulders. I recall, fondly, the many mentors in my life who tried to do the same to me, when I was in my teens.


It is first of all vital that you do not - under any circumstances - consider your nature - which I read to be kind, sensitive and considerate - to be flawed. You are not a loser.

You are going to make mistakes with women, and you are going to get things right. More often than not, this happens without any conscious effort on your part. Sometimes you will try everything you can to 'woo' some maiden, and it will not happen. Then, you will equally see that things sometimes just work out, despite making some blunders that would normally send women running for the nearest exit.

Women can be the most wonderful things on this planet.....and they can also be cruel and ruthless to an extent that will leave you bewlidered. They are people, and people can be good or bad. They DO, however, share certain characteristics that you ignore at your peril.

Number one. A large number of women are attracted to utter bastards. Actually, many women deny this, even to themselves! Why? Bastards, assholes, etc have that magical factor 'confidence' in abundance that some female members of this forum have already mentioned. Bastards and Assholes do not care, seem always in command of any situation. Of course, after a while, women leave bastards who, needless to say, dont' make the best partners, but they then go and do it all again. 'This one will be better' and 'I can change him' are some of the good ones women come out with, when their exasperated friends ask what she 'sees in that asshole'.

Number two. Women can spot a nice guy pretending to be a bastard from a mile away. Don't even try it.

Number three. Women are put off by anything they see as a weakness or perceived weakness in a man. There is not a lot you can do about this, because this varies from woman to woman.

Number four. Women want to be swept off their feet. The world can be a very dreary, ordinary place. A man who stands out as exciting or 'slightly dangerous' ie a bastard is irresistable to a lot of women.

Number five. Women 'categorize' ALL men very simply into 'friend' and those they are attracted to ie. want to sleep with. Women like to believe men do this, too, but of course, we don't....do we boys?

Ok, so where does that leave you? I am afraid that this girl you are interested in sees you as a friend. Whilst it is possible to change her opinion about you, it is very unlikely. You must be honest with yourself, and use your intuition (Women also believe they are the only humans with this ability. They're not) to gauge your chances.

My advice is to play on your strengths. Sensitivity, Creativity, Kindness, Consideration ARE strengths. Be friendly, smile as much as you can and always LOOK GIRLS IN THE EYE. This comes across as a very confident thing to do. It shows you are interested in them, that you are not a frightened little rabbit. Talk about music. Learn to play an instrument, if you don't already. Gain knowledge from libraries and the internet. Have a good sense of humour and always take a 'knock-back' from a girl with good humour. It is their loss, and there are amny, many, many fish in the sea!

Good luck, and remember, success comes from experience, which comes from making mistakes.

Go for it, Tiger.

 

thank you very much, thats the best advice i have ever gotton in my life about ne thing at all. thank you dude, and for the record, i play the guitar.