If Animals Could Talk

What do you think they would say ?

 

They do talk, they just don't speak any Human languages (or at least not much)

 

Good point,

Then let me rephrase the question; If animals could speak a human language, what do you think they would say ?

 

Why can't I eat what you're eating?

 

Id think theyd be basically the same as any guy..the most common phrases would probably be


feed me....

can I stick my face in there?

let me outside I need to take a leak..

your crotch smells good

 

and "rub my belly please"

 

I forgot "what's for dinner"

 

LOL!

That's hilarious

 

"Stop talking to me in that stupid voice"

 

"do you have to dress me up in these stupid clothes again!?"

 

lol, I'd give you some rep for this, but I'm not allowed too.

 

My mother used to do both of these things to the family dog when I was a kid, and the dog didn't need to talk, it's eyes seemed to say "please for the love of God kill me"

 

lol.

 

I'm almost positive my cat has engaged in unspeakable actions during the periods where he disappear for weeks at a time, only to return covered in dirt, blood, smelling like shit and with large patches of fur missing. I doubt he'd speak of these things even if he could. Thinking rape and murder.
Only a matter of time before he trots off into the sunset for one final time, never to return.

 

There's a few cats in my neighborhood that just look mean as hell, even the neighborhood dogs don't seem to mess with 'em.

 

my dog would say,. "you squeeze me to much"..

 

I think a lot of them would complain about their names. Like, all the animals out there with names like "mittens", "lucky", "spot", "buddy". Animals probably have their own non-human names that are much cooler. They'd probably say, "what's with the fucking name? You know there's cats out there named Nanadandu, how cool is that? And you have the nerve to name me 'snuggles'?! Fuck you!"

 

If my cat could talk, she would never have been allowed to sleep in our room...she has seen too much

 

I can't have animals around whenever I'm doing something sexual. It weirds me out too much. The animal is just as conscious as we are, they just sit and stare. They'd know what's going on too, that's the weird part.

 

"if you don't let me outside in 2 mins im going to eat someones shoe and you wont find for a few weeks, then you wont be pissed because its to late."

Im curious what my dog would say when she barks. She is a perfect guard dog. Bark is nasty sounding.