I want to change how I see and think..(help would be immensely appreciated)

Yes, and the author is "Eckhart Tolle". I also recommend my books. Ultimately, start reading all you can, and listening with your Conscious heart. All truth is confirmed in your heart, you do not have to seek confirmation from another.

 

Live deliberately. As we grow up we are taught to react to certain situations in specific ways. In order to erase this and change the way your mind processes events and subsequent reactions, stop and think before reacting. Think about qualities that you find to be admirable and make a conscious choice to possess those qualities.

This may sound lame, but writing in a journal has always helped me to change the areas of my life I need to change. When all your thoughts are in your head, they can get muddled. Putting them on paper allows time for reflection and it allows you to see flaws in the way your brain processes stimuli, information, and emotions.

 

For me it's been forcing myself or being forced to do what I fear the most.

Everything changes when you conquer a fear.