Alright hear is the deal. I'm really stressed about this. Okay my dad is driving me crazy. I am 21 years old and he is constantly wanting to know where I am who I am with. Like still trys to take away my car when I bought my car and it is in my name. I mean I have to admit I did put my parents through hell, I've been to jail tons of times, me and my brother have stolen from them, lied, everything in the book. BUT in the past year i have cleaned my act up gotten a job, gotten into school, paid my bills, and not been all strung out on drugs all the time, just smoke some nug every now and again, and now suddenly he doesn't want anything to do with me. He hasn't talked to my brother in three years and he has a grandchild and won't even talk to his own grand daughter called my brothers wife a fat mexican bitch, and now he doesn't want anything to do with me. should i feel bad or not. he said that as long as he doesn't talk or have anything to do with me or my brother then he doesn't have to hurt any more i just don't know what the fuck to do.
Oh, well then I'm confused. How can he threaten to take your car away if you don't live with him? You don't have to answer to him as to who you are with or where you are. Really, sometimes it is best to cut ties. I haven't spoken to my father in about 8 yrs or so because of the way he treated my brothers. It pisses me off that it had to come to that, but in the long run, for ME it was for the best. Maybe you should just chill out with him. Don't try to talk to him for a while and let him cool off.
Ok, I am confused to. You say that he is trying to control everything you do but then say he doesn't want to have anything to do with you. Anyway, when people change they automatically expect everyone else that they have screwed over for years to turn around and praise them. It doesn't work that way. Trust and respect are earned over long periods of time. If it is that he is trying to control you, you are an adult and live on your own. He only has the control you give him. You can't force him to get over hard feelings and he can't force you to inform him of everything you do.
It just may take some time to show him that you've straightened up your act. He sounds like he is angry and bitter in regards to his children and their families. In can be hard to earn trust and respect back in any case - and especially once a parent has taken on this kind of attitude. The only thing you can to is try, it's up to him to accept you. I'm sure it will hurt if he wants nothing to do with you, but at least you have done what YOU can.
He's your dad. He's allowed to worry. You'll realize that when you become a parent. If you've been in and out of jail and were a hellion, he has full right to worry about you and ask questions. Maybe you should think about apologizing. Did that ever cross your mind? You should show him you're responsible and adult enough to make the first move.
