I kissed a girl....was my bf's reaction normal?

Long story short: Last weekend a group of us went camping. It was: My boyfriend of 3+ years, my neighbor(girl) & her kids, and my neighbor's friend (girl). We got really drunk and I ended up laying on the ground kissing my neighbor's friend. Boyfriend walks up, sees us kissing and gets pissed. It made the rest of the camping trip extremely awkward. To top it off, i found out the next day that even though she has a bf, she is bisexual. Anyways, he says I cant hang out with her anymore, doesnt even like me going to my neighbors house cuz "what if she came over" etc. He's being crazy jealous about it and the fact is: I have no attraction to her at all. It was something fun to do while wasted. I honestly didnt think he would care.

side note: i think it would be fine for him to kiss a guy, and i would think that me kissing a girl would be fine for him too. Its only when its guy-girl that bothers me.

SO....how would you have reacted?

 

He sounds a bit insecure

I would of jumped in the middle and or grabbed a video camera. Just don't turn into a lesbian because of him, that would be scarring.

 

I would be aroused but I don't know if I would join. I wouldn't be mad though. But a guy would get hurt if I walked up.

 

3 somes are awesome whats wrong with the guy----not normal IMO-----thats a total fantasy that sometimes gets to come true--my ex girlfriend was bi and she had to cut me off cas i always paid too much attention to the new girl--oh well shit happens---never got jealous of another girl--maybe im the weird one?

 

i would have been pissed if my gf kissed anyone, regardless of gender.

 

unless the two girls asked me to join in, in which case it's a-ok

 

I didn't ask him to join, I was pretty out of it. But I woulda been down with a threesome for sure if he woulda came over happy instead of yelling.

 

So what.. it was jest a bit of fun he needs to get over it. I think he totally overreacted

 

The problem is not his reaction to you kissing her, but your reaction to his reaction, now. Do you feel comfortable in a relationship where he tells you where you can and cannot go?

 

Perfectly normal.
It's still cheating even if it's with another female to many males.
Without asking (or otherwise knowing) his feelings on such a subject first, that is NOT something a girlfriend should be doing. Just because Katy Perry sings about it, doesn't mean you're boyfriend won't feel hurt and betrayed by it.
You cheated on him. (Note: I'm not saying this would always be cheating, it depends on what your significant other thinks of course)
If you acted like you seem to feel on the subject, like you did nothing wrong, I would have definitely dumped you. Fuck three years if you can't even treat me with a little respect.

Now, how he is acting now; all controlling and insecure; you have to be able to understand a little bit. You broke his trust, you hurt him bad, and you seem to have hit him deep where his insecurities lie.
However, you can not allow this behavior to go on. You should be apologizing your ass off, you should be telling him you didn't know he would mind, and in retrospect you know how dumb that was to assume, but you have to tell him to lay off, that it won't happen again, that you aren't in love with her, that you aren't drawn by her, it just happened - kissing is fun - and you didn't realize it would hurt him. But he can't treat you like some dog or child if he wants the relationship to continue.

 

I totally understand his reaction, for one I wouldn't care if it was a boy or a girl, I would've been pissed especially if it wasn't an open relationship. I can understand if he knew you liked girls and knew before hand that you might want to fool-around with a chick, but it sounds like he had no idea at all until he caught you. Yeah cheating is pretty fucked up, you were drunk but still not a blameless excuse. Alias he will just have to get over it or end the relations, because he can't tell you what to do.

My $.02

 

yeah i think he totally overreacted! he should have understood that u were intoxicated and shit happens when ur drunk. he shouldnt have taken it so personally. and i think its bullshit that he is telling you where you can and cant go and who you can or cant hang out with. it's ur life and ur choice. tell him to grow a pair and get over it.

 

I wish every girl was this understanding when men cheat.

 

Cheating is cheating, it does not matter who it is with. He is mad at you because he assumed you and he had a monogamous relationship and you betrayed his trust.

 

He has no right to tell you who you can hang out with.
Is he your boyfriend or your parent or your prison guard?

 

Duck is RIGHT ON. I kissed a girl and I'm in a 4 year straight relationship, and yes, we were all drunk, but I made absolutely SURE that it was okay with my boyfriend. I really REALLY think he oughta dump your ass, because obviously you don't care about how he feels about the situation. You don't deserve him.

 

yet another case of a guy not knowin that he has hit the girlfriend goldmine......I would have checked both your drinks to make sure they were full and sat down to enjoy the show...he sounds like the kinda guy that will eventually forbid you to even make eye contact with a waiter or store clerk....wish ya luck...

 

Perfectly normal reaction by the boyfriend this day an age methinks.

And sounds like the OP might have a winner there, a guy thats a bit more clued into women than the type thats going to try get you to put on a show for him and his mates.

In fact I'd probably take a guess that the OP's boyfriend more clued into women than the OP is

 

:cheers2:
Just the replies that have agreed with her so perfectly illustrate the difference between someone who actually cares for their girlfriend and someone who sees her as a sex object. That she is upset that he's not the latter floors me, and makes me wonder why she's even in a relationship.

 

I think he over reacted.