I just Cant achieve vaginal orgasm..

Like many women i cant come through intercourse. This may be a long post, but please hear me out.

I am 20 years old and have been sexually active for about 18 months. I'm in a happpy longterm relationship but the whole no-orgasm thing is really getting to us. I'm extremely attracted to my man but even when im really into it and as horny as hell, i cant achieve the big-O. I can only come with stimulation of the clitoris (oraly and manualy).

i do enjoy intercourse. I like the pressure i feel, i DO get stimulated but without peaking. I seem to feel a sudden increase in pleasure during sex, but then the pleasure just seems to get "stuck" and doesnt peak. The same happens when my man stimulates my G-spot with his fingers. (yes, we have located the G-spot, but i think it's on strike!! LOL) Plus while getting fingered, i feel a strong urge to pee which holds me back. Some sex positions help me get more stimulation, of course.

Naturally i have discussed it with female friends. One said she has had a vaginal orgasm when her partner fingered her. Another said she simply comes during sex and was actually surprised when i said i was unable to do the same.
All the people i've shared this with say its simply psychological. True, your mental state plays an important role, but it cant be the sole reason im not getting all i can out of sex.


Is there anyone who has been in my position? Did you overcome it? How?
Any advise would be greatly appriciated. xxXXxx

 

It's not uncommon for woman not be able to come through penetration. I can, although it takes a lot longer for me to reach that point than it does through clitoral stimulation? My vaginal orgasms are very intense though. It takes patience and time! My bf cannot give me a vaginal orgasm with his penis because he does not last long enough for me to get there. He lasts longer by going slow and soft and loving, but then I can't come because he is not going hard & fast enough. I still enjoy our lovemaking very much though.

He can make me have a vaginal orgasm with his two middle fingers. He stimulates my g spot and I will squirt when I come. I taught him how to do this.:love: It does take patience to get it right though. Do not stop or hold back when you feel like peeing! Just let it go. I make a mess, but my bf does not mind, he likes it. I can also get there when he uses toys on me also!

 

I can't

The closest I got was when I was high though.

 

There are some women who can just think about having an orgasm and they come on the spot. There are women who can cum from just being fucked, and women who has to stimulate themselves to get off. And then there are women who can't have an orgasm at all! I have to stimulate myself as well during sex to have an orgasm. No one has ever been able to get me off by themselves, I always need to help. So honestly my only advice is that everybody orgasms differently, try to find a way that works for you. Just because you're not screaming on his dick like some fake titted porn actress doesn't mean you're doing something wrong.

 

You may require a bigger cock, or simply someone that can fuck you better. Yes, I'm serious, it has worked for many.

 

It's a curious thing, honestly I don't know but I think it's got something to do with the way ur 'layed out' if you get what I mean? To clarify I wasnt able to get a virginal orgasm until after I had children, now it's no problem, maybe it's just because things have 'shifted' a bit inside...otherwise I have no idea except not to worry about it, all of us have used a helping hand when it was needed

Shayla x

 

That strong urge to pee you describe says to me that you are probably a squirter waiting to happen! Let it go when it is happening and you my just get that orgasm you are looking for with a little extra treat.

 

I have the same issue and I'm also 20. Been active for 3 years. Except I feel like I've been preventing myself from getting them and im just now realizing it. In certain positions the pressure feels way too intense, and I literally start crying involuntarily -_-. It's not painful at all, just too much along with feeling like I have to pee. I'm sure that if I kept going then I'd orgasm but I simply just can't handle it and always have to stop. One day I'd like to actually go through with it, but the only guy that has ever gotten me to that point is my ex-boyfriends who I have absolutely no sexual attraction to anymore, no matter how hard I try. It sucks because all of my friends have had orgasms as well, yet when I describe my situation to them, none of them have had the same reaction that I get. I feel your pain OP.

 

I thought that might help cause i got really close when i was high too!!

 

Same here. Maybe marijuana helps.

 

Actuau i think my mans cock is just perfect..The length is excactly as much as i can handle, the girth is fine too plus it curves upwards so it does hit my G-spot especially when im on top....I can feel it hit the spot, i just dont climax...

I have no intention on finding a new cock

 

hhmm....it's the same for me...when he goes fast and hard i can feel a form of climaxing..i know i could cum if he carried on like that but then he cums :/ So i guess fingering is the way to go..Im kind of afraid though cause i feel this urge to pee when he fingers me....does that mean i'm a squirter??

 

I think we just need to get passed that "i want to pee" sensation....i always stop my guy too cause it's too intense....but i WILL go through with it ! I guess you just have to shut up and take it

 

I never expected my sex life to be like a porn movie and thank the gods it isnt! I'm quite hapy with the way things are,i just really think there is more to it...And i would be happy to explore my sexuality....

I'm just greatful i can cum in general, whatever the means!

 

You really should give it a try and let go! Talk to your man and tell him that you are going to let it go. I am sure he will encourage it and you will both be happy with the results. One of the best things my lady ever did was just let it go when it felt intense and she had the peeing sensation. It was like opening up the flood gate and there has been no turning back since. I really don't know how any guy would not be happy his lady is a squirter. Fun for all involved.

 

Two things comes to mind:

Fully relax. I think as penetrations get really heightened, it's easy to tense up. If you fully relax, orgasms might cum easier.

When you get that pee sensation, don't let that make you hesitate. That is a common feeling when the orgasm is going to be powerful, and you might achieve squirting.

 

^agreed

 

Hi the description you gave at the begining It sounds like you and your man are almost there in getting you an orgasm through sex. But get your man to really connect his pubic bone onto your clitoris when he's going in, thats whats going to get you off. Sometmes smacking into it, sometimes rubbing against it, sort of squshing it. See what works for you. This doesn't do anything for a man, which is why some don't do it naturally. It isn't down to having a massive cock, its how you use your whole body.

Ladies please don't shoot me down here, but I've had a few ex-gf's tell me that they can't orgasm through straight sex with a man. I'm talking woman in their mid to late 20's, some were mothers, some weren't, some had been in relationships for years, some had different partners but they were active for many years without getting anything from a man, and I've always manged to make them cum sooner or later, normally within an hour of fun and games.

The great news is once its happened once, I've found these women to be the most receptive to sex, they cum in like 10mins flat after the barriers have been broken.

I'm not saying that the woman who can't orgasm with a cock doesn't exist. But all the ones I've met who were sure they couldn't do it, did! with a little patience and the right techniques.

 

Some women don't experience vaginal orgasm until well into their 30's, some never do. Like most things in life, success comes with time and practice. Like most things with regard to sex, you'll probably achieve it by yourself, before you will with anyone else. The greatest gift any lover can give to a woman, sexually, is complete and utter acceptance, comfort and trust, but you have to practice utter acceptance, comfort and trust in yourself before you can truly accept it from anyone else.

 

My guess would be you are a squirter. Put a towel underneath and tell you bf he's in for a surprise if he hits your spot just right. Men love the fact that we can make you squirt.