I just became...

A REVREND! all legit, and everything from the Univeral Church of Life, and now I can preform Marriages, all legal and everything. I'm even gonna go as far as to get the little offical plastic card that says I can legally marry people!

So anyone wanna get married?

 

can I confess my sins to you?

 

I may need you to preside at the scattering of my ashes.

 

Everyone and their mom got one of those.

 

Woot! My friend is ordained through that same church and we're going to have him perform our marriage ceremony. He doesn't know we've chosen him yet, but he'll cry tears of Jedi joy when he finds out.

 

can you marry me to this delicious mug of chocolate almond milk? I LOVE IT!!

 

Not my mom, she would totally think that's a sin.

Woman are suppose to be Revs or Priests or Ministers or whatever, so fail!

 

Jedi Joy, haha good stuff!

 

Fail for women?

Yes indeed.

Fail for you for having a dumb mom?

Yes indeed.

 

If you really want to, but I'm really not into the whole screen room thing, and giving you a penance or whatever....

 

oh no I insist.

 

Everyone was raised differently, she can't help it that she grew up in a strict catholic family. She she tired to do the same thing for me and my brothers, needless to say it didn't work out so much with me.

 

LULZ

 

before you try to marry people, there have been mixed results in legal cases due to questions regarding the qualifications of a universal life church minister/whatever in such matters

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Universal_Life_Church#Statements_about_legal_status

just saying

 

She gotta persevere.

 

ministers so unreliable these days

 

Thanks for the info, I gotta slight feeling I'm probably just gonna end up maybe only doing like one or 2 rainbow marriages anyways

 

Psh. Like wikipedia is real...

So. You gonna scatter my ashes or not?

 

Where do you want them scattered Zooms?

 

Lets just say you get a paid weekend in Monterey, CA...