Seriously, I think my memory is going. My thinking faculties are getting impaired too. I think I'm becoming an automaton. I don't remember shit I did last week, and barely remember yesterday. Ok, now I remember playing a billiards match --- but it feels like 10 years ago. And when I remember shit from 10 years ago, I can't BELIEVE I did this or that. Like, I don't know...I can't believe I actually had sex, or went to the Eiffel Tower, or got into a drunken brawl in this bar or that, or gambled away all my money, or had a gun pointed to my stomach, or had a girlfriend for 3 years, or stayed in bed depressed for 2 years, or drank and smoked 3 packs of cigarettes everyday for a year straight, or moved from place to place 13 times in life, etc etc... How did I survive all this? Any of you feel like that sometimes or am I just getting old?
Yeah, I think I'm losing my grip on reality. Thanks to all of you from the bottom of my heart!! :biggrin:
you're getting old. sorry, but it's true. it only gets worse from here. but when you surrender to that and decide you don't give a shit, then it starts to get better fast! one thing I just can't believe I did was marry my 1st husband. stupidest thing I ever did. We totally didn't go well together, I wasn't in love with him, we had a bad sex life, and he screwed me over pretty bad in the end. so... what the hell possessed me to do that shit? insanity, yeah I think that's what it was.
I think it's all predetermined and choiceless. It's not like you do this or that and thing turns out well or not. I've taken so many risks, and look at me. Healthier and stronger than I've ever been.
What was the weirdest job you've had? Shit, I did some crazy shit. I remember passing out once shoveling rubble from this underground demolition site on Bleecker St. I was 18...The dust fucking just blacked me out. The night before I spent drinking my ass off and smoking marijuana and had like 2 hours sleep. I was not the same person I am today.
My first wife never cooked, cleaned, had sex with me, and felt it was my turn to babysit since i'd been out all day (working). Needless to say, that lasted 7 months. hehe. So I hear what you's sayin, blues. It was pretty stupid. Not sure why I did it. I was 21 and we were in vegas for my birthday. uugghh
I'm only 22 and my short term memory is already shot. I'm probably going to be in a nursing home by the time I hit 30! lol
Wow. That reminds me, I was once engaged... Whatever that means, anyway. I guess it meant something to both of us back then...so.
well let's see. once I helped out a friend in her adult lingerie and novelties store. we had some Menonite customers, funny enough, and I'd frequently get requests by them to "model" the lingerie for them. LOL! I've had all kinds of jobs... anywhere from nurse's aid to insurance underwriter and business analyst.
You know what happens too? Sometimes I say things like, "I would NEVER do this or that" only to remember that I have already done it years ago. Fuck I'm old, I'm telling ya.
I'm reminded of the Meatloaf song. I would do anything for love. I was semi pathetic at 21. Thought I was all manstyle and needed me a wife. Boy, was I wrong. In the end, it all worked out just right, though. I'm a happy guy nowadays.
It's hard not to appear pathetic to the eyes of experience. I think I will realize how pathetic I am now in 10 more years, if that. I'm really just a young punk!
