I feel kind of bad for this...

Ok everyone, I was thinking about this lately... Of course we'd all feel very sad/angry/frustrated or whatever if our girlfriends or wives cheated on us. But did you ever think how you would feel if she cheated on you with another woman instead of another man? I thought about it, and I really wouldn't feel nearly as bad, and it's not because I like lesbian-stuff or anything, because lesbian stuff doesn't do much for me. I feel very confused though, why would I be kind of "OK" with it if she cheated with a woman and not a man? o_0


Now obviously, this question was geared towards male, but girls are free to post their thoughts on the subject too.
Anybody else ever thought of things like this?

 

Maybe it's because men are more aggressive than women, generally. Another man would be a sort of competition for you. If she cheated on you with a guy, she could leave you for him, where as if she cheated with a girl, it is most likely experimentation. The idea of women on women is kinda subtle/gentle, because there isn't much penetration, just kissing, licking, etc. Men on women is more of a real kind of sex. Penetration: penis in vagina is a little more extensive and rough. Hell! It's another penis in YOUR girlfriend's vagina. It's very different with another girl...

 

Girls just can't give her the same thing we can buddy.

 

you don't mind it much because of absence of penetration.

 

Well don't lesbians/bi-sexual girls use strap-ons and stuff like that? It's still penetration... and what about fingering, oral sex, and stuff like that? I'm one of those types that gets aggressive over the thought of another male simply touching my girlfriend.

 

Anthropologically it comes from the fact that if a female cheats on a male with a male and if she gets pregnant, then her mate doesn't know who the father is, where if she cheats with a female, that simply isn't an issue.
Outside of anthropology you could logically argue that the risk of transmission of STDs is so low with female-female sex that it is much less risky for you than if she cheated with a male.
Many people also think it is "not something they can provide" therefore making it non-threatening.

 

Personally, it's all the same to me. Especially when she could probably just ask...

Cheatings more of an emotional thing for me then just sleeping with somebody else.

 

Well, cheating is cheating. If you fuck a guy it's the same mental sort of thing as fucking a broad, just with different physical aspects.

If I was in a relationship with a bisexual guy, I wouldn't really have much of a problem if he wanted the occasional boy-toy, because I understand that I can't satisfy his need for a male. I would expect the same kind of treatment.

As long as all parties are fully aware of what's going on, then it's all good.

 

Well I've thought about it from many points of view. I guess it's just because I have that whole "male competition" thing... weird though, because I'm not normally that type of guy. I guess it's all different when you feel a "threat" towards losing your mate to another male. o_0

To be honest though, I wouldn't want her to cheat at all, but I doubt she would. I just wanted to know if anyone else has ever thought about this stuff.

 

Ask for a threesome!

 

No.

 

Makes sense enough to me I guess. You think that women are on average more homo-sexual than men are? I see lots of bi-sexual women these days, or more and more women who just want to "experiment" to see what it's like to be with another woman. Maybe men do it just as much, but are ashamed to admit. Their "Manly reputations" being at stake and all.

By the way, I noticed you live in Knoxville. That's not very far from here, and I used to live there. I think that Tennessee is kind of boring, how about you? Cool sig pic by the way, I love Zelda, Super Nintendo and the other *ahem* things in that pic.

 

ha! yeah, snes is awesome. i'll kick anyone's ass in mario, anyday. and the thing about women being more openly bi-sexual, IMO, is very true.

about tennessee, it is very boring compared to the western states (i know this from experience), but in knoxville, there is always something going on. we have a huge park in the middle of the city (the world's fair park, have you heard of the sunsphere?), and they have event there all the time. i really like it here if i ignore all the southern bullshit.

 

some good points made here already, so i'll just explain my point of view
if it was sneaking behind my back, thats cheating & a lack of trust & i'd be upset based on that
however if there was open communication, i'd be more likely to be ok about it with a womn then man simply because i know women can give eachther something men cat in general
however i would want to have open communication, & meet the person just to set my mind to ease that it wont be someone who is intentionaly hurtful
the situations never really come up though so its al theoretical or how i think i would want to react in the situation..the only time anything close happened was my most recent ex started making out with 1 of my closest freinds whosa lesbian, right in front of me & it felt allittle strange for just a momment & then was fine..but thats as far as it ever went
the only other 2 times turned into pretty loving 3 way relationships, but unfortunately that kindathings hard to keep together
nut they did last maybe 4 months each & i'm still freinds with 2 of them the other 2 moved overseass where the 1 girls from (as freinds not lovers)

ok i'm rambling..not sure what my point was

 

dave went ahead and gave me permission. he does travel quite a lot, and i typically prefer sex with women. i've got a man, he's perfect. competing with that would sorta be worthless. but women...women are art, beauty, nurturance, sex incarnate to me. i can't help that. thankfully dave understands the difference. however, he can't have sex with other women when i'm not present or aware of it. because a lotta women are selfish bitches and will want to keep him.

 

lol, ok, but would you let him have sex with a guy while he's away?

 

sad to say, i don't know. my ex enjoyed sex with men, and i realized tha the only thing that really bothered me about that was that he was SUBMISSIVE to them. i was unable to witness that and stay aroused. now, if he were the dominant male, it wouldnt' bother me, in fact, it's incredibly sexy to me. but submissive men are not really my thing. they make me evil, and i don't like that.

 

I can totally understand where you are coming from. I think it has to do a lot with male to male competition and testosterone. It's like, we as males have this natural instinct to take care of our woman, to be the hunter-gatherers. Women generally tend to be more nurturing. Another woman doesn't seem as much of a threat because of these basic natural instincts. Also, a woman cannot procreate with another woman, so that threat is removed. Then there is the whole mechanics of it. Since you are, I'm assuming, a hetero male, the female body turns you on. So the thought of a naked female body all over the one you love, is a lot easier to deal with than the thought of a naked male body all over her, penetrating her, etc.

Being cheated on sucks. I have had it happen to me, and I think it would have been a lot less traumatic for me had she cheated with a girl instead of the deuschebag it was. Either way though, it would end the relationship. I like honest communication, and fucking anyone behind my back isn't really that. I would rather her talk to me about it beforehand. And go from there.

 

a lot of us would probably just be mad if we didn't get to watch.



/what?

 

I'd be just as upset either way, cheating is cheating, who the other person is is irrelevant..