I don't really know anymore

you might want to try checking out acupuncture for the pain.

I also hear that qi gong can be good

there's a story about a qi gong gransmaster who messed himself up really badly in a car accident, but through diligent practice, he was able to recover

you might want to see a therapist. maybe also there are some vetran's benefits available to you?

hope that everything can get better soon!

 

I read your post too,
I usually get bored and never read till the end, you are different.
You say you know 'hippies' well they don't beat the shit out of anything other than themselves I believe..

You have led a diverse life you have wisdom to share on many levels welcome to the forum ....

 

I've triedd acupuncture, and it didn't get anything out of it. As far as the VA is concerned, they don't want to admit that my "special unit" were in the areas that we were, and that we may have been exposed to stuff that apparently is screwing me up. How can several people from the same team each have degenerative disc disease in their backs, overwhelming muscle and joint pain, as well as degenerative cartilage in most of the more well used joints. You know, like your knees, hips, elbows, fingers, pretty much everything. Did I mention the blinding migraines, bowel spasms that feels like someone just sucker punched me in the gut? My intro actually was me in one of my more "up" moments. Getting up in the mornings is my worst time though. So, I've become kind of disillusioned with the VA. Well they do keep me pumped full of drugs, and rated me at 80% disabled. You wouldn't know it to look at me though.

Thanks Dancing til Dawn. I've been on here for a few hours now just reading things on all the forums. I will have to say, I'm feeling better. I laughed so hard at some of the stuff I read, I needed that. So I don't want to just come on here and rant, I guess I've just had it all bottled up for so long, I needed a release, and blowing it here helps a little.

 

Reading the forums is great but dont be afraid to join in on some of the converations.

 

Scrapper, first of all, you are very welcome here :seeya:

I'm glad you DID post rather than hit delete ... because you sound like a really great person who always wants to give of himself. That makes you pretty special :mickey:

There was one thing you said which really worried me, and that was when you said that you had thought of taking your life but weren't brave enough. Now I'm gonna tell you something that may come as a bit of a surprise; but trust me. I've been there and I know. And the thing is, that actually taking your life isn't the brave option. The brave option is facing up to whatever it is you need to face up to, and carrying on no matter what. And, from the sounds of it, your ethose is to carry on no matter what until you've achieved your objective. So, to me at least, the fact that you didn't go through with it makes you LESS of a coward, not more.

However, the fact that you've been thinking that way is worrying; and while I generally don't like the idea of just throwing medication at problems to make them go away, you might like to think about taking some St John's Wort. It's a mild natural anti-depressant which you can buy over the counter (well, you can here in the UK, anyway) and it just about saved my life when I was trying to get off the ADs (I was one of the Seroxat guinea-pigs: nuff said!)

Pain is a different matter, though. Constant pain is totally debilitating and you need to find a way to be free of it if you are going to function effectively. If weed is the way to achieve that then I'm not gonna judge you for it (not that I judge people anyway :mickey: ). Bowel spasms are a really issue ... but have you considered that they might be brought on by a dietary intolerance? A coupel of years back, after quarter of a century of indifferent health punctuated by five different seriously debilitating conditions (yes, including depression and debilitating bowel spasms) I chanced upon several differnt writings which between them identified each of my five major conditions as having been linked to gluten intolerance. I took gluten out of my diet and things improved no end. There was still a secondary intolerance to be identified (which had been masked by teh gluten) and I soon identified that as cow's milk. So I took that out of my diet too and now I'm MUCH better.

Dietary intolerances are a pain to identify - you have to do it largely by trial and error - but when you do, and once you've adjusted your diet to cope withthe lack of whatever you have to leave out - your quality of life can improve immeasurably.

There - I've rabbited on even longer than you. But you are most welcome here. Stay and chat. There's lots of different people with lots of different takes on life, and there's very little judgementalism. :mickey:

Oh, and there's more than a few veterans with issues of their own who may understand where you're coming from FAR better than those of us who have never served ourselves.

I hope you find whatever it is that you're truly looking for.

Peace & hugs.

Becky

 

I believe the word 'degenerative' in the diagnosis implies a breakdown of bone and cartilage as a result of aging. That would release the Army (government) from liability.

 

but you have begun, you found your way here, joined and bared your soul, and you'll find friendship and understanding amongst good folks.

 

i think that journey has already begun for you,cos now your talking ta people bout how you have been really feeling.welcome to your world scrapper.enjoy the journey.

 

You're correct "outthere2" But this started when I was 23! I really think, and I'm just shooting from the hip here, but most 23 year olds don't have a severe degenerative problem going on throughout their bodies.

 

I did...

 

Welcome. I read your whole post, honestly. We all have our demons and issues that we have to face everyday, some worse than others. I hope that you find what you are looking for wherever it may be. Good luck in your future, look forward to getting to know you better.

 

Hey thanks for all the positive welcoming energy.

I am new to the forum as well and have a couple questions because I'm frustrated:

How do I join groups, create my own signature, upload my own avatar, and post a new thread?

Do I need to pay for all for these functions?

I appreciate your help!

 

I am kind of new to all of this also but from what I am gathering, you have to make 20 posts and be a member for 5 days and it will allow you to do more. I know some of it you have to pay for. On the forum list there is a forum that answers all these questions. Scroll down from the top, it is not far down at all. Good luck!

 

You are very welcome Keep on keepin' on in the quest for Peace!

Thanks for the kind words