How can I get along with my sister?

I need some advice on how I can have a better relationship with my younger (16 yo) half sister. I got along well with her before she was a teen, but we weren't raised together. I see her about once a year for a few weeks if that. And we always used to get along. When I'd call or come to visit she'd get really excited and want to spend time with me. And that was great to me because she's my only sister (I have 3 younger brothers.)

But in the last year or so when I call she doesn't seem to care. And now I'm at my father's visiting and she seems like she could care less that I exist. She ignores me completely. I'm staying in her room with her and the most she says to me is goodnight when we go to sleep. And I admit I don't talk to her much either because I don't know what to say because we're so different. And I just get the feeling that she doesn't like me. My brothers don't act like that...I get along very well with all of my brothers. They are much more down to earth like me. My sister and I are opposites and I think that's a big part of the problem. I'm pretty much a hippie. I tend to be very serious and intellectual and quiet. I'm Hindu. etc. My sister on the other hand acts like a typical blonde cheerleader type person. And she considers herself a Christian. And I hate to say this, but to me she seems arrogant, selfish, and rude. We're opposites. We even look completely different. No one can believe we're sisters.

I would really like to get along with her and be closer to her. But its just so hard. She's the type of person that I'd avoid if she weren't my sister. And I'm hoping I can help her see the light a bit too. She's so caught up in the material world and it saddens me. So, how can I get along with her and get closer to her when we're so different?

 

Perhaps yal were really close, and then when you went away, you left her with a empty void, and she has some type of grudge towards your or just a plain ol broken heart from you not being around like you were.

 

Buy her a suitcase full of various dildos and a carton of Lucky Strikes and you two should be good to go!

 

That only works with my sister.....

 

I know. I bought her already.

 

I was never around a lot. I was raised by my mother in one state and she was raised by my father and stepmother in another state. So, that's not it. I think she just hates hippies!

 

You........................... paid for a whore? You really are stupid huh? lol

 

Is she a full blooded sister? How much time HAVE yal spent together before she began this shit.

 

Sounds like she's just acting 16. Try not to take it too personally, give her some time to grow up.

 

Or just beat her fucking ass.

 

Your more like friends than brother and sister (imho) friends don't always get on .. it maybe that you just have not seen each other change in personality..while your apart....do you write or email each other..??? if not ... try too keep in each others lives even when your not together.

 

Just treat her like one of the guys! You could also: Pick on her, take her places, smoke up with her (if you're comfortable), just basically be her friend... It may take time, but it will be worth it.

 

She's my half sister; we have the same father. As I said...we weren't raised together. I lived with them for 6 months once when we were kids, but since then I see them for about 2 weeks a year and I talk to them on holidays and other times on the phone. I e-mail her but she hardly ever writes back. When she does write back she doesn't seem to care about me, she just talks about herself. Argh! She's just so self-involved!

I guess she is being a typical 16 year old, but this is not easy to deal with. It doesn't help that I'm horribly jealous because she was raised in a 2 parent household and has always had our dad around. And she gets to live in a beatiful house, has a BMW, and gets whatever she wants. I never got any of that. I was raised in poverty by a single mother. We have had completely different lives. And she sits around here complaining that her life is crap and she wants this and she wants that. It makes me want to scream! I want to show her that she should be thankful for what she has. When I was her age I was taking care of my mother who was mentally ill and raising one of my brothers. And my sister's biggest worry is how to do her hair each day. She just doesn't get it. I try to tell her that she should be thankful for what she has. I tell her she should be nicer to our dad and brothers because family is so important, but she doesn't listen. That girl hasn't had a taste of the real world.

I don't know...I'd like to have a close relationship with her, but it takes two to make the effort. I'm just going to hope that this is just a phase.

OK...I'm done venting now.

 

sometimes siblings just are two different people


btw (not saying ur the bad guy) its really annoying when people do things like this

"I try to tell her that she should be thankful for what she has. I tell her she should be nicer to our dad and brothers because family is so important, but she doesn't listen. That girl hasn't had a taste of the real world."

at night just start asking her lots of questions about her life ask her about drinking, sex, drugs those are good teens things to talk about and after asking alot about her maybe tell a story or two about one of those things that happened to you

 

just buy her really ugly clothing and stop trying.

 

i understand where you are coming from, i have a step-sister and same thing, she spend much more time out of my life then in it. i understand the want for the relationship that sisters have, but sometimes you just have to realize that just because there is some kind of relation it doesn't mean that there has to be a relationship. i'm not saying that you should give up on her, but don't push it. like you said, you never really got to spend much time with her, maybe she resents you for that, even though its not your fault. just don't worry about it, people change and if you two are supposed to become friends then it will happen aslong as you are open when she comes to you.

 

Maybe it is annoying when someone tells you to be thankful for what you have. But at the same time...my family here has no idea what my life was like growing up. These kids don't know what its like to go hungry or go without anything for that matter. I think they need to understand that not everyone has it so good. And it upsets me when I see my sister not appreciating things...it reminds me of my past. And frankly, I don't want to remember what my life was like at her age. But when that girl complains that she has to drive our brother somewhere in her freakin' BMW it drives me insane. I am sick of hearing that stuff. So, I said something to her about it once because it was upsetting me and I want her to know that it upsets me.

And I'm sorry, but...sex, drugs, and drinking are good teen subjects?!?!?! I don't even know where to begin with that one. And besides that she's a virgin who hasn't touched cigarettes, booze, or drugs. seriously. She's a goody two shoes. And I don't want her to go down the same road as I did anyways. I am proud of her for being so good in that way. She's making some good choices.

I just can't find any way to relate to her. We're so different. blah.