How Can I Broach The Subject Of Cumming In My Girlfriend With Her?

Hi all. I've been with my girlfriend for just over a year and we have a fairly good sex life. She was fitted with a Mirena IUD a couple of years ago that appears to still be intact and functional, and so we have sex without a condom sometimes (but I always pull out) and sometimes with if I want to finish inside her. She doesn't let me finish in her without a condom because she's worried about the risk of pregnancy (slight as it is) and is a little grossed out about it. I'd love to do that as it's kind of a fetish for me and I've never done it before. I don't know if it's even appropriate to call it a fetish since I think it's fairly common to enjoy the feeling of cumming in a vagina?

I've always done my utmost to give her pleasure. She's kinky and I'm kinda vanilla so I went out and bought ropes and other toys that I could use to keep her excited. She likes to be dominated - also new territory for me - but I've done my best to act the part and do most of the work. I spend however long it takes, sometimes a few minutes, sometime up to 2 hours, to give her the most intense orgasms she's ever had. I feel like I deserve some reciprocation but the problem is I feel it will take a bit of insistence on my part to get her to agree to this, and I've never been very good at asking for things that people don't want to give me. It makes me very uncomfortable and anxious. I feel like I need to have everything planned out, such as: What if she does get pregnant? We're not looking to have kids right now, so even though it's very minor risk, I'm still basically asking her to risk putting her body through a potentially traumatic event just for my momentary satisfaction. Not to mention the cost of having an abortion, should it come to that. That makes me feel even guiltier for wanting this. There's also the less important but still significant issue of cleaning up. She finds cum kinda gross so I'll have to have an effective clean-up protocol in place before the fact.
Does anyone have any advice? Thanks!

 

Make sure you are both on the same page with what is going to happen if she does get pregnant.

Use a spermicide in conjunction with her mirena device.

Shower together during or afterwards for cleanup.

 

Why not just use condoms all the time and cut the risk/clean up bit?

 

Just ask and tell her you plan Yo use spermicide or something. The worst that can happen is that she says no.

 

umm hello (-: ! I'm probably younger than most people on this website but hopefully this helps....

you could use a spermicide with her, or just pick up some plan b at your local pharmacy. if you don't know what that is (pretty sure you do but if you don't) it's an after morning pill, and it's like taking a whole pack of birth control pills at once. it stops the sperm from fertilising the egg

you can get pregnant from pre-cum as well, so you're taking the same chance by pulling out as you would be when cumming inside of her

I have really bad anxiety too, I have a bit€h of a time telling people what I want without feeling so anxious I'm about to have a panic attack. take a couple deep breathes, and just ask her to go on a walk with you, in a place where there's no a lot of people, it helps with anxiety rather than sitting her down at home.

tell her what you typed here. You would like to cum in her, and you do a lot of new territory things to please her, so you feel it would be fair to have her do something new to please you. Don't be arrogant about it like how I said it, but just casually bring it up. talk about the possibility of pregnancy, what you two would do if you had gotten her pregnant, talk about the options, and reassure her about everything.

talk it out. if you don't tell her and talk to her about it, she'll never know just how bad you want to do this (-: hopefully that was helpful, sorry of it wasn't.