he gets turned on too easily, too quickly

and he says its from not.. like.. non use, lack of erotic feelings, so he gets mega turned on, fully erect by cuddling and talking about regular things, and he doesnt know what to do. neither do I. What can we do?? (we dont have sex or w/e so I need sort of prudish suggstions)
thanks guys

 

erm...make use of his "problem"???
but you said you didnt have sex...well, perhaps that's the reason he's got a permanent boner...
well, if you dont have actual sex, why dont you do other stuff, perhaps it's as rewarding as sex itself...well, try something, you can't let that go to waste!!!
just kidding, if it's bothering him so much, he should try masturbating ...or see a doctor if it's affecting him (and you).

good luck

 

sounds like he might be trying to pressure you.

but I dunno?

 

he knows I rarely get turned on, etc, and he said " before I get any pleasure I want you to be happy, it's always about the guys in the relationships, as if the girl is just there for him. I want this to be equal." bla bla

 

well, in that case... I dunno, maybe give a little, you know compromise, because hes horny all the time and youre not, so thats not equal in itself, you just need to meet eachother somewhere in the middle. Sounds like to me.

I hope that whatever happens, youre both happy, good luck

 

Maybe you should tell him not to worry about it. If he gets hard that easy he could probably recover and go again in the time it takes to cum. What's w/e?

 

w/e is what ever
as far as your boy goes geting hard...umm...theres not much you can do about it. you're releasing phermones constantly which he picks up the scent of, and triggers a natural reaction of getting horny. its nearly impossible for guys to cuddle and not get sexually aroused if they didnt just get their rocks off
also i find i get way hornier when im not getting any, so perhaps an occasional helping hand would stem the problem...but like you said if your not willing to do that...then you're jsut gonna have to put up with the natural reaction of the male body.
a boners a bitch but what cha gonna do?

 

Basically, if hes 16 to, he could get a boner looking at an apple. So, there's not a lot you(or he) can do about it. The best thing to do is just accept it, and try not to make him uncomfortable about it.

The less of a deal you make of it, the more likely he'll be able to control it. BAsically, with age, he'll get better about controlling it, but the occasional uninvited boner will always raise its ungly head.

Peace

 

umm...and the problem here is?

 

The best medicine is thinking about something really really really disgusting.When I wake up with a morning boner and need to pee I often imagine Barba Streisand naked .Comes very close to puttin' the boner under cold water and is (physically)less painfull.

 

The fact that you effect him so strongly is a testament to how intensely attracted he is to you. The fact that he isn't trying to pressure you in spite of the fact that he's got to be near insane with lust is a testament to how much you mean to him and how much he cares about you.

I can't say I blame him for getting turned on by you. Lets face it, you're a major hottie. If I had a girlfriend like you when I was 16 I don't know if I'd ever calm down. I'd be in a perpetual state of heightened sexual arousal. The fact that he's not humping the couch says a lot about his self-control.

 

Hon, there is not much you can do besides help him with it or ignore it....But don't ignore it. That would be a waste!

Holly
btw this is my 300th post! Yay! Go me!

 

Yeah, there's really no problem here. I would rather my boyfriend get turned on all the time with me than never at all...lol. He doesn't seem like he's trying to pressure you or anything. If it's really that big of a "problem" then tell him to masturbate more...or help him out if you're ready for that. But really, this "problem" isn't worth being too concerned over.

 

if he is 16, and you dont fool around, theres a good chance he will jump at the opportunity if someone else will....

 

you could always give a hand job. unless your ready for oral sex.

 

Sounds like he gets turned on like boys his age always do. He's normal - that is, his hormones are raging and it will be a few years before he learns to really deal with it. That's the way it is. It seems to make you uncomfortable. Aren't you turned on by him? What do you do then?

Have you considered that his idea of your being equals is that he hopes someday soon you will be as hot for him as he is for you, and then you can do something about it? He's trying to be patient about it because he respects you and wants to give you time to become comfortable with the idea. However, make no mistake, he'd really like to get some sexual release from you, one way or another. He just want you to want sexual release from him to an equal degree (and he is quite willing to supply it).

If this isn't going to happen, and you have no intention of 'going there,' then I can give you some advice:

Don't put yourself into situations where he will get aroused. Hold hands, give him a peck on the cheek at the door, and don't let it go any farther than that. If you have to, take a chaperone whith you everywhere you go. That should turn down his flame.

If he breaks up with you, don't take it personally, he obviously likes you a great deal, and I assume he respects you since you haven't said anything about there being any pressure to go further. However he is not entirely immune to the call of his libido. This is why older dating customs were so puritanical. You can't have your cake and eat it too. Intimacy sparks a desire for further intimacy. That's how it works. So either be intimate or don't. This in-between stuff is just torturing the poor guy.

 

lol kelticman! *shy smile*
Uhm, he is, very in to me, and I like him back, but I honeslty have zero interst in sex. Like I can say that truly, I've never WANTEd sex from him, or him to toush me or anything. I'm pretty much dead inside. theres a whole mental thing too, that i cant get into right now, but to sum it up, I'm too distracted mentally and lack the capacity to be turned on by a boy. I'm never horny is the bottom line.

 

I'd suggest therapy. For both your sakes. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE see a professional about that! I can't stress that enough.

Until then, stop with the physical intimacy entirely. You really are just torturing him. It isn't fair to either of you.