I terribly miss piping in the haggis to Burn's 'A Man's A Man Fa' All That'. "Here's to the lassies that love us. Who know all the worst about us, And despite the damning and incontrovertible evidence, Steadfastly refuse to believe it." Slainte!
One year, a mate of mine who was a bit of a poet in his own right, was dating a vegetarian, who he brought to Dinner. After the recitation of The Address, we did it all over again, with full pomp & ceremony, this time with a can of vegetarian haggis formally carried in on a silver trencher. He then stood by, and delivered his 'Address to a Vegetarian Haggis'. At the penultimate moment, instead of ceremoniously slicing into the haggis with my piper's dirk, he reached over and, with great flourish, popped the pop-top of the can. It was absolutely brilliant.